• Member Since 13th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

DbzOrDie


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Source

Something has been gnawing at AJ

It has been several months since she joined the rest of her friends as an alicorn. After having time to think about what this might mean for her future, she arranges a meeting with Celestia.



Contains AppleDashery and another ship I shall not name :p

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 9 )

huh, bit different.
but i liked it.

Nice to be able to see another Alicorn Applejack story after so long.

However, Applejack complains that no one is able to assure her of her love, but after a small chat and cry with Celestia, she's fine. It doesn't sit well with me. Also the fact that relationships change over time and one thousand years is a long time for one. Even 200 years is. Celestia should know this.


A nod to Gamer Luna is nice, but she knew AJ and Celestia were talking and interrupting even for her controller is a breach I don't see her doing. Maybe after Applejack left, but not during.

4151052
Yeah, I'm still not good at writing at drama and what comes after it yet. I didn't even plan on using drama, but it just kinda snuck up on me and I liked it.

And well, Luna doesn't know how important the meeting is, and they don't have to appear as just royalty anymore, now that Applejack also is a princess. Now they are equals, it makes it more comfortable to be who you are, instead of just a royal princess.

I didn't feel like this was much of a comedy. Slice of life, definitely. Comedy, much less so.

Let's see here...

Honestly I feel like the central weakness of this lies in the conversation in the middle of things. A conversation needs to... I dunno, evoke something. I felt like this just kind of happened, and I didn't really get the characters coming through strongly here. It isn't a bad idea for a story - Applejack worrying about her love going away, and Celestia talking about her own experiences with such - but it didn't feel punchy enough or well-delivered enough, and I didn't feel like the flow was nearly as good as it should have been.

4151304
Aaand, comedy tag removed.

“Always glad to help a fellow pony in love”, Celestia replied as disappeared in the hallway, leaving the door open behind her.

:ajbemused:She's... late for a date with Discord isn't she?:facehoof:

Cute :raritystarry: Finally THE MANE SIX AS ALICORNS :pinkiecrazy:

short sweet and to the point. had a nice lead up imo

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