• Member Since 8th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen January 2nd

Vinyl Scratch289


As the world around you moves you stand there motionless. Unable to talk and watching as the world around you collapses. Such is the way of life.

E

After I arrived in Ponyville from Manehattan I meet everypony there thanks to Pinkie Pie. Really I wanted a place to live in peace. I meet her friends Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack. I quickly fell in love with Rainbow Dash.

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 58 )

I like this! It's a cool theory that Dash is with him

Yeah from Dr who. Daley caan.:derpytongue2:

I like this story!You better finish it or I will force you to!:twilightsmile::pinkiecrazy:

I'm going to give this story a chance because I like it so far. I do suggest though, if you don't already have one, to get a proofreader for this story.

I don't mean be a bother but when is the next chapter coming out

Aye how's the story coming along

4249271
I have chapter two just waiting on my editor to give me the ok

4249280 I see I see well can't wait to read it:pinkiehappy:

4249388
Thanks I'll get it soon (I hope anyways)

If your proof reader hasn't read the chapter yet I'll gladly do it for him

4288515
Actually this was my fault I didn't get time to get to put it up yet I've been really busy he has sorry I'm gonna put it up right now.

Good chapter,some grammar errors,lots of romance,and overall I give this chapter an 8/10

Definitely want moar:pinkiesmile:

So badly written and poorly thought out that it is entertaining...

4297359
I know you a damn troller dude

4297373 I wasn't trolling, I was serious.

This fic is so bad that it is entertaining. I am not trying to be a dick or anything, but the grammar is subpar at best, the plot is incredibly rushed and disjointed, and the spelling errors are quite prolific. You misspelled 'Zecora' for crap sakes.

It is still entertaining though, I would say it is almost like watching a train crash into a fireworks factory while on fire...

4297395
Dude right now I'm not in the fuckin mood for this even if your not I have a friend wanting to commit suicide right now.

Comment posted by Vinyl Scratch289 deleted Apr 27th, 2014

4297406 Believe it or not, I have talked down many of my friends who have seriously considered suicide. If you want any help convincing them that life is worth living, I could provide some advice.

But back to the original conversation before you changed the subject; I am not trying to be mean or anything, I was simply giving my honest opinion. Your decision to take offense to the voicing of my opinion is your choice. I was simply providing honest feedback supplemented by my feelings towards your fanfiction.

If you choose to take offense, even though I do not condone it, I will not, as I have not, try to insult or agitate you.

4297432
I know that I'm just sayin. I'm really just not in the mood for anything. I know its your opinion and I respect that. I was just simply fair warning you not to really say anything to me right now. Please.

I have to agree with 4297395.
This story is very rushed and many events feel contrived.
One thing that really got to me was how the Main 6 dropped everything they were doing just to visit a freind of his.
And Deathwing just moved to Ponyville, and he is already visiting a friend in Manehatten?
The interaction between Rainbow Dash and Deathwing is rushed, contrived and emotionless.
Spelling and grammar errors.

These problems stand out to me, and can be fixed without much diffictulty.
I recomend getting a proof-reader.

4297442
Then visit the critisms we leave at a later date, they will still be here in a few months.
Just because you are not in the mood for critisism, does not mean you are an exception to it.
Also, hope you talk that friend out of suicide, would hate to see another life wasted.

4326706
Its not in manehatten its Canterlot.

4327151
Woops, my mistake.
But still, is it really that hard to spell 'Canterlot'?
You misspell it in the story and also misspell it in your comment.

4328336 why do you care so much if you see it's annoying to him than why do keep trying to fix everything. If you enjoy the story than shut the he'll up and enjoy the damn story. If he wants you to criticize everything than I'm sure he'll ask

4328336 how do you spell it then if it's wrong

4337089
I spell it the correct way in my comment.

4337086

If you enjoy the story than shut the he'll up and enjoy the damn story.

I belive you wanted to say 'hell'.
I want to enjoy this story, Deathwing seems like an interesting character to me. But in it's current condition, this story is hard to enjoy.
Just because an author did not ask for critism, does not mean that he is exempt from critism. The only way to become better is to take critism into consideration and accept they might have a point.

4337950 sorry I type fast and you spelled it the same way he did so why did you correct him

4337982
He edited his comment.
I believe he originally spelt it: 'Chanterlot'
He also spells it that way in the chapter.

4337950 I understand what your saying but if he dosent ask for it and you see it aggravated him than maybe you shouldn't give it

4338007
He does not have to read the comments we leave right now.
When he calms down, then he can read our comments and perhaps make the story better.
It does not matter who you are, what you are or what mood your in, you will always get critism.

4338015 i know your very much true but is a such thing called keeping your opinions to yourself or say it in a nicer way

4338047
There really is no nice way to give critism.
Other than opening my comments with "I know this will seem harsh but..."

4338140 let's just stop this obviously isn't going anywhere so let's just call it what it is

And yes there is

4328336
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH:trixieshiftleft:

4297395
Just so you know, you probably has a wonderful life going on. I feel bad for this writer not you. So please, if you want to be a good sport, and you have nothing nice to say, then shush.:trixieshiftright:

4618800
What is this supposed to mean?
To stop talking?
I stopped commenting on this a while ago, you are only bringing me back.

4618989
Psshhh! Whatever. You can't change me or bring me down. So go ahead and talk.:twilightsmile:

4619036
What do you mean?
All you did was reply to an 8 week old comment and tell me to shush.
I am coming back to figure out what you mean.
I don't know what you mean by "you can't change me" "so go ahead and talk."
So please, explain.

4619080
Sorry, just repeating what.my 5th grade teacher said to when somebody is trying to bother you. Over done with gone man.:twilightsmile:

4619118
You still have not answered my question.
What did you mean by shush.
You told another commenter to do so.
So please, explain.

Great story Pinkamena, but why did you decide write this?:applejackunsure::trixieshiftright:
You deserve a fav from me, my friend:twilightsmile:

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