Fluttershy was enjoying a stormy thunder filled night, when Pinkie suddenly came to her doorstep. Fluttershy decided to make it into a sleepover. Knowing the party pony surly they could have a lot of fun. Well, if it weren't for Pinkie being so scared. Warning: cuteness ensues, cuteness that is so cute it might just give you diabetes. Read with caution.
A cute FlutterPie fic based on my own phobia of thunderstorms. I hope you enjoy, I can't tell you how proud I am of this fic, and how excited I am to show it to the world! :squees:
The first story in my new story series, FlutterPie! Basically a bunch of cute stories of Pinkie, Fluttershy and friends as they grow closer and closer together.
(Please note, I have gotten someone to pre-read this, but am currently in the process of revising it according to his suggestions. It won't be anything major, just some adjustments here and there to improve the story and make it the best it can be 
That was a sweet story. My favorite parts were the thunderstorm game, the oatmeal, and the letter. There was surprising emotional depth for such a short, saccharine love story. There are lots of spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors but only a few that really affected readability, and I am of the opinion that they add to the charm of the story. I hope you keep writing.
3783448 Aww thanks, that was such a nice comment, really made me smile
I'm really glad you liked it, especially the thunderstorm part. That part has a special place in my heart, as it's literally where the story began. I just came up with that scene and knew I had to make a story around it 
And don't worry I plan to keep on making more sweet FlutterPie fics and some other types of fics too.
Oh and what did you mean by when you say that some of the spelling errors add charm to the story
I don't understand how they would.
I thought it was very good
3784285 Thanksies, I'm very glad you liked it
Love it And
3793920 Um what does that emoticon mean
Are you saying that the shipping is cute? Sorry I'm just confused, since you have a sad Fluttershy there 
This story was good, and I really enjoyed it. Fluttershy's comparison between Pinkie Pie and thunderstorms was great.
3794034 Haha,Thanks. Pinkie really is like a thunderstrom when you think about
heh, u were rite this was too cute; not enough to giv me diabities or whatever but, i enjoyed t fic very much anyways
. keep up t great work n' maybe i'll keep a eye out for ya in t future 
3796413 Haha, thanks a lot. I'm really glad you enjoyed it
Hopefully I can get an idea for the next story here soon so I can continue the cuteness of FlutterPie
Also thanks for the fav, apreciate it
3796506
? But, if not then i'll probally still lik it 
ur welcome n' is this next flutterpie gonna be a follow-up to this one or a entirely new one that's maybe will be a lil longer
HA! Pinkie is so random X3
3796595 It will be a continuation. I plan to make all my stories in the same timeline from here on out, so if you were to organize them in order of when they happened, it'd all from a straight line. I actually do plan to brake off in two different directions at some point, but all the stories posted before that happens (including this one) will be cannon no matter which direction you go. It will be a while before I brake off though, so until then let the FluttersPie cuteness continue!
3796663 Yup that's for sure
Where you talking in general about the story or about some specific part/s? I'm curious, as I can't really think of a moment where I thought she was being that random. But then again maybe it's because I wrote it, and I know the meaning behind some things she said that may not be obvious to others 
3796746 I specifically mean the part where Pinkie broke the fourth wall XD
3796751 Oh ya, she was actually being kinda random there. I wish she would stop doing that sometimes, she's gonna doom us all one day with her 4th wall breaking, but hey it was at least funny
, now please can you..
, is that seriously all you remember
kiss, and I was all like gasp
! But then I was like yay!
It was the best! Anyways I gotta go, see you later Crisy.
......
:sigh: Random as ever, Um ya, sorry about that, Pinkie just loves to intterupt what I'm doing for such silly things. Anyways glad you liked that joke, still hopefuly she doesn't do things like that too much more.
:Pinkie: Of coarse that's why I did it
:Crisy: What!? Pinkie go away right now, I'm trying to type.
:Pinkie: Oh who you talking to?
:Crisy: Someone on the internet who liked my story enough to comment
:Pinkie: Oh you mean that story where Flutters kissed me
:Crisy: Yes I,......Wait
:Pinkie: No, but it was the best part, I was like I love you and then she was like yay
:Crisy: Wait what?
3793929 Sorry mean a happy Fluttershy and i do like the shipping
3797188 Oh okay, I thought that was what you meant, but I just wasn't sure. But ya the shippings the most cutest ever. Afterall what do you expect when you put The cutest pony
and second cutest pony
together.Well, you get cuteness overload, and who doesn't love that
3797213 You don't what to ask that to few people i know
3797251 Well ya, there are some pretty hardcore shippers out there, and even the non-hardcore shippers still have there preferences. I don't really mind what shipping's people like, but my fav will always be FlutterPie simply because of the cute
3797299 I like this one TwiDash RariJack
So does this mean sequel?!?!
3796734
n' (2) 
heh, ok only two emoticons describe my feelings rite now on this awesome news: (1)
3805301 Hopefully, if my brain will finally start coming up with some good idea's
Also thanks a bunch for the favorite
3805847 Haha, I'm super excited to continue too. Just as soon as I can come up with some good idea's, but considering how I came up with this, I'm sure I can come up with some more
3799190 Hmm, TwiDash's pretty good
I personally don't see RariJack, but that's just me. Really though if it's a good story I'll read it no matter the ship
Soooo cute! I absolutely love flutterpie! (Or pinkieshy?) I absolutely love Pinkie Pie. So. Much. Cuteness!!!
4131612 I know right
you're basically taking the 2 cutest ponies on the show and putting them together, it's only logical that you get cuteness overload
) Pinkie is a good story, Pinkie Pie's my favorite
Then again any story with happy (as in not phyco
4134375 Pinkie is best pony!!
4134690 Haha, definitly
4134865 Filly pinkie is cutest!!! Unless you count fluttershy!
4135553 Hmm I actually think filly Rainbow is the cutest when their little
, then Flutters and then Pinkie. Also Rarity, but that's really just for her adorable little hair-do when she was smaller.
Still Pinkie was pretty awesome as a filly and her living on a rock farm holds so much potential for fanfics
And I'm sure the new-ish episode "maud pie" will hold even more fanfic material, man I just can't wait to watch it
4137337 I gotta agree with you there.
4137512 Agree with me on what
, I mentioned a lot of things there
4138610 Oops, well, everything there.
They're all just so cute!
4140163 Ya ponies were pretty much made to be cute
4141961 Yes, they're freaking adorable
This story officially violates the one and only Pinkie Pie ship, CheesyPie.
static.allmystery.de/upics/b03019_Orbital_friendship_cannon.gif
5267211 Haha, but it's worth it right?
……wait a sec 
cool! 
I've never had someone look at more then one of my stories before…granted I only have 2, and one's cancelled, but still 
Hey you were on my other story,
This is now one of my favorite stories...
... THE CUTE NEVER BOTHERED ME ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!
5267822 I do that a lot. If I'm interested, I'll read anything!
5272099 Well that's the best attitude in my opinion,
is same way
5369935 Hey, love and tolerate, right? Gotta have an open mind in this fandom.
THE GREAT KING BRONYCUS STRONGLY APPROVES THIS SHIP AND HAS MADE IT LAW THAT ALL WITHIN HIS KINGDOM SHALL LIKE THIS SHIP IF NOT IT WILL BE PUNISHED BY DEATH.
Hey so to all those who were hoping for a sequel, well um.....there might still be one
Since I did promise it, and it still sounds like a very fun idea, I will try my best to come up with something
But ya, as much as I like writting, I don't think I'll ever really be very skillled at doing more then oneshots, for one reason or another whenever I try it fails miserably. Oh well, I can't say that it bothers me that much, but ya I'll try
This story definitely had some good parts, but the grammar was very distracting for me. I'd see if I could find an editor if I were you.
There were some other things about it that bugged me, such as how rushed it felt and Fluttershy's character seeming a bit off, but it wasn't too bad. It was passable. If a 5/10 is considered average, I'd say this story is right on the five mark. Not great, but you still effort into it. I can definitely see you writing something great with practice.
I hope you heed some of my advice and use it to keep improving on your writing. I can tell you put effort into this. Keep at it, and you'll keep improving. Have a good day.
5957154 Thank you for the criticism. I actually did have a prof-reader, but we kinda started a friendship and I totally forgot about actually fixing the story, even though that's why I contacted him in the first place
Now that's all ancient history, but I haven't really touched on this story a lot. I certainly used to be more into writing back then, than I am now
But I still care about it, and I'm sure there are a lot of issues, grammar and formatting gives me headaches, I'm not going to lie 
) I did lose track of some of the original intentions, which I'm sure are responsible for some of the issues.
Ya characterization probably isn't spot on, and I do certainly agree looking on it now, that it is very rushed. I'm not sure if I care about writing enough now to try and fix the speed of it, but I do have plans to hopefully go back and fix some things in the future. During the long spread out process of writing this (way longer then it needed to be
But ya, rambling aside, I'm glad you enjoyed my story, despite it's problems
"Um well, I'd still like to play that game.”
Welp, i lost.
6038137 Haha, oh jese, The game.....You know, to even start that, you'd have to think of it at least once, so that never quite made sense to me
6038655
Yeah, but after you think of it you get sometime to get it out of your mind, so you can keep playing.
Dang it I lost again!