- Member Since 8th Aug, 2013
- offline last seen March 30th
Sand Storm
I am a big Spike fan, so most of my fanfics will have Spike and/or CMC as the main hero's. If you have come here for some logic than this is the wrong place...maybe
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This sounds like an interesting premise for clop, but – looking at the description – it doesn't seem like it'd be properly executed. Sorry, but I wouldn't give this a read. Not yet, at least.
EDIT: You should also put the Sex tag on it before the mods see. Not sure what they'll do, but it's better to be safe than sorry.
good job on it
Some help with the grammar is needed but I've seen worst and a decent first clop attempt.
Can't wait for the next chapter.
It needs a lot of work and that's for only reading the first paragraph.
it has some potential but you really need to push it.
A good idea, but it could use a bit of cleaning.
Otherwise, looking forward to more
If you want, I'll help you with proofreading.
I'll even do your description for you better.
Warning: This story may be bad so prepare, this is my first clop.
When the gang goes looking for Fluttershy after her transformation, Spike takes a wrong turn and ends up alone with a fruit vampire pony around. But does this end with two lover birds or bats?
not bad but needs a good shine idea = 10. clop and over all = 4 at the best
it needs better flow and more legth
They all say a threesome but it'll go on into a foursome, a fivesome, sixsome and the dreaded sevensome.
u know this isn't hav bad n' i do see t spellin errors that some people r talkin bout but, other-wise said errors aren't so bad plus u caught my interest
. So, can't wait to read moar 
You need very heavy editing for this story. And if you plan on making a part two, you are going to need 2-3 editors and a pre-reader. Otherwise, nice premise for a story, keep it up.
.....Ahem. There were a
few grammatical errors and such, but it was mos def an interesting premise, concept, and beginning of a story. I am on-board for more. 
Got to give it to you I like yours alot being a "flank" man myself lol (idk if it is because i am a "zebra" or not lol)
. But ether way it is nice to see someone write one that focuses on that aspect of passion lol.
will this be continued?
please?
for flutters?
I look forward to your eventual sequel
not bad few grammar errors but that can be fix up so ill give it 7/10
A fun little read, but there were a few errors early on that kind of ruined my immersion into the story