This is Twilight Velvet's last time to have fun before she has to grow up. The Summer Sun Celebration is the perfect place to find herself. Everything goes fine, until a fortune teller predicts her marriage to somepony other than her fiancee. But when Velvet begins to fall for Night, she has to choose whether or not to do what she knows to do or take a chance and follow her heart. The story of how Twilight Sparkle's parents fell in love.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Oh, ye cruel fate, why can't you pair me with someone like you connected Twilight's parents!?
All in all, I enjoyed it - I don't think I have ever read anything about these particular characters so it instantly piqued my curiosity. Perhaps the ending is a little bit rushed - a sudden timeskip and Velvet's decision of abandoning her fiancée for Night didn't feel entirely right... but that's just me. The story would probably work even without Velvet being engaged from the beginning, but it was an interesting read nevertheless. Good job!
I like this. I've always liked Twilight Velvet and I like how she was presented here.
I do have an issue I need to addressed though.The bit with Velvet being engaged and then abandoning her fiancee really didn't seem to have a purpose. It's one of those kind of things that could be removed and it wouldn't affect the story what so ever. If you're going to include this tidbit into the story, at least have it serve a purpose. For example, I would've liked to at least see what happens to him and what his reaction would be. Does he find out she was seeing someone else? Do they talk it out? Which one initiates the break up and are they still friends after that? These are questions I was asking as I read the story and to have them never be answered just disappointed me and it held this back for me on what could have made an interesting conclusion with many options. My advice is to either build up on that or drop it all together.
That's just a personal nitpick for me though and in all honesty, I still liked it and the story seems genuine.
My rating: 7 yays out of 10
