• Member Since 11th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Nov 24th, 2013

CreepyPasta


T

Being a Pegasus that can't fly is no fun, at all. When a Lunar Pegasus guard confronts her about a choice she must make, she has to choose between her friends or her flight. Which will she choose? Will she go with the odd looking Pegasus and become who she wants to be as a flyer, or choose her friends over her desire. Only time will tell.

(There is some comedy in this story not all that much).

(First attempt).

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 5 )

I liked it:twilightsmile:

This is pretty good. Keep up the good work.

I's say the biggest issue with this story is that the writing flows like a river of bricks. Ideas are often unclear, and when they aren't unclear they're stated. Some other issues, like a lack of commas and no breaks between several paragraphs, don't help.

I have my interest piqued

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