• Member Since 20th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

Foals Errand


Guess whose back?!

E
Source

Scootaloo, an orange pegasus filly. A cutie mark crusader and a wiz on her scooter. What else is known about her? Nopony is certain of where she came from and why it seems that she and her mother Clear Skies just vanish sometimes. What if the truth about Scootaloo is even more unbelievable then anypony thought. What if in reality there is no Scootaloo.
What if, what if the flightless pegasus...
Was somepony everypony loved and respected.
How would everypony react if they knew the truth.
About the alicorn in pegasus coating.
The Alicorn named, Celestia

Awesome artwork done by my talented friend!
Otto!

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 85 )

This is great. Looking forward to seeing where this goes. Kudos to you and your writing partner. :pinkiehappy:

5210977
Thank you! From both of us it's a lot of fun to write!

I can't wait till the next chapter. And if I'm right, I wouldn't be surprised if this got featured.

Him interesting. We get to see what happens if Celistia was actually Scootaloo. I wonder if there's going to be a kind of chapter where you know Celistia would reveal her identity to Applebloom and Sweetie Belle after the events of Twilight's Kingdom.

Hey wow, look at that cool coverart. Where'd that come from? I'd like to meet the kickawesome cephalopod that made that.

I really like this so far and I'm very interested to see where you go with it. :pinkiehappy:

Omg my upcoming story was similiar to this...but with an oc Alicorn that wanted to experience something she's unable to.

It has an interesting premise and is well-written, not to mention the prologue has me wondering what will happen next, so I'll definitely be following this. Keep up the good work. :pinkiesmile:

I like this one. So far it's turning out very interestingly. IU'm gonna keep an eye on it.

I'll see you at the next chapter.

MIND. BLOWN. EVERYWHERE. PLEASE CONTINUE.

The real question here is "How in the world did Celestian learned to ride a scooter!!?"

5213084 Why is so strange? I mean, she have more that a thousand years, she could have years to try

5213116 Do they had Scooters one thousand years ago?

5213123 Who knows, maybe they have UFO's a thousand years ago and now they use carriage because they like it more.

Even so, if let's say, they found the Scooters ten years ago, in ten years she could find plenty of time to try it

I am interested how will you pull this out. Celestia has many duties and in the show Scootaloo is going to schooll every day and spends lot of time with her friends. We mustn't forget that few times we saw Scootaloo and Celestia in one room.
I see in this universe Luna wasn't victim of parasitic life form called Nightmare but went crazy and wanted murder whole planet.

Does this mean Celestia is responsible in part for releasing Discord?

Ooo, I'm looking forward to where this is going! I eagerly await the next chapter :twilightsmile:

Quite the premise, and the writing is quite well done. I dare say that you have my attention and interest.

~Crystalline Electrostatic~

“Okay, then. Here… we… GO!”

Interesting concept... And considering all of the "Scootaloo is Celestia's daughter" fics I've seen, this is certainly more original! Good luck having constant updates. X3

Other than some dialogue that feels a little forced, and the fact that Princess Celestia wouldn't have time to go crusading every day, this is pretty good.
If you were to take this and use it as a guideline to rewrite the chapter --really just manual copy and paste-- I think you would largely fix your word choice issues. Overall its a good first draft. (It takes crazy talent to get a story right on the first time through)

Interesting idea you have here, I can't wait to see what you'll do with it.

This is going to be great; I just know it.:scootangel:

-Spirit

5215965 And Scootamom is, well WAS a good one to:fluttercry:

by the way, NICE cover art:pinkiehappy:

you should do a sequel with how she met the crusaders.

5218227 did you notes that story is mark as incomplete that means they maybe more chapters for this story

*My two favorites characters fused into one.*
I am interested.
Please continue.

5211096 Coincidence trolls all the time. :trollestia:

Clever concept. I feel sorry for Diamond Tiara now, she has NO IDEA who she's about to bully. Who all here thinks she'll wet herself if she finds out she's been repeatedly bullying the bloody princess of Equestria almost everyday and hasn't been severely punished within that time? I'd say her face would pale greatly.

Hmm. I am interested, although the premise will certainly face some challenges from canon.

I have not read this yet, but suddenly I am struck by a terrible familiarity about something with a similar premise...

Oh, right. The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo (By defender2222), Chapter 14: Applejack.

Anyways, should prove to be an interesting read at any rate.:scootangel:

Now I have read the prologue. It is indeed familiar, but who cares? I like it! :rainbowdetermined2:

Also, my first comment on this story seems to have appeared here. This one's third. Oh well.

OH MY CELESTIA THIS IS SO GOSH DARNED CUUUUUTE!!!:yay:
...what the hell did I just write.

Tracking... Now!

5312955
Heh in fact it is based on that chapter with permission I promise! I hope you continue to enjoy!

5312986
I thought it might have been something like that.:pinkiehappy:

Very well written.....
Though for some reason I don't like it.
I don't know why, I just don't.
I think it's the fact it kinda breaks apart when the y first met, messing with the main canon, or the fact that scoots is Celestia, which I think is impossible, because I'm sure that I saw a scene in the show where scoots meets Celestia.....
I dunno.
Still gonna read it though, makes for a very interesting idea.

5313019 I agree with you. However, I suspect there is going to be a memory wipe of some kind to make it cannon. Also off topic, but If you got time I would like to hear what you got to say about my story, just don't read chapter one, I have no clue how I'm doing. No one has told me. I'm desperate for actual input.

If only she and Big Mac actually had a chance...

CCC

One wonders how she will possibly find time, between her other duties, to regularly attend Miss Cheerilee's school...

And now this puts a dampen on their relationship until the episode where Apple Bloom realized Scootaloo doesn't have a cutie mark.

The part with Celestia recounting what she had to do to Luna seems a bit out of character to be honest, but I like the idea and the writing seems to be of decent quality. I do believe I will stick around and see where this goes for now.

I can tell that this will be good. I will watch for updates. I'm not saying it isn't because it is really good. I know it can only get better from here.

See, I wish you guys would PM me links when these go up! I would have read it A LOT sooner had I known.

Will check it out tomorrow and give you my review.

Looking at her brother and how close he was getting to Clear Skies, she could guess another reason he wanted the fillies to clean up. “Uh huh, sure ya do, brother. Wouldn’t have nothing to do with that pretty mare ya been talkin’ to all day now, would it?”

Kids are more perceptive than most think.

5313019

Well, at the very least, you're being civil instead of simply raging at the author or the fic as sadly many people do.

5685086

No problem, you're well within your rights not to like the chapter, we all are, but there is a difference between saying you don't like it and why, and simply saying quote unquote "Boo this sucks." Before I go off on a long tangent, I'm just glad you were willing to explain why you didn't like it in a perfectly civil manner. Have an magically mustached reptile.:moustache:

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