When a mysterious space alien crash lands in the merry and peaceful land of Equestria, will anypony, villain or hero, be prepared to face the horrors he brings with him… specifically his penchant for home-made alien booze…
Prepare for madness, prepare for insanity, prepare for villainous machinations and stratergizings!
Prepare for alcoholic beverages deemed illegal chemical weapons of mass destruction by all advanced civilizations!
Prepare for theonset of the occurrence of many various completely unrelated things, wherein stuff happens that sometimes will even make sense!
But mostly, prepare for a trollfic like no other...
(I was feeling extra-special insane this evening...)
Chapters (3)
Trollfics aren't gonna be held by the community. Unless some of the more famous people publish it. Not good. I recommend ejecting thyself with speed!
3482197
No, it isn't a trollfic. I'm quite sure Alondro is deadly serious. (even if he is calling it one. I suppose it's bound to get worse?)
Having said that, it's intelligently written, just stupid. How is that possible? I could not tell you exactly... It is a mystery of the internet as age old as time itself is I'm sure.
Now, my opinion on whether this is a good fic? Yes, I think it's 'good', which is purely a subjective word, mind you. Though, in this case I may be guilty of some bias... I am quite found of madness, after all, one could say I'm even a proponent of it.
Some other cover art would probably do you well though, Alondro. Comedic satire is all well and good but if your art is literally... well... sh**, most folks won't look far past it.
3482290
Fireball, cinnamon schnapps.
AWWW YISS
BLACK SINGULARITY POO HOLES AND ALCOHOL
Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters. Just remember that friends don't let friends blarg-face through space.
3482218 See: "Young Frankenstein".
Well-written farce is out there!
3482218 You miss the point.
That the picture IS the point!
I think... not sure... I was REALLY insane last night. Too many hours cooped up with an ABR machine that wouldn't work right.
3482218 Oh it's going to get worse all right.
Especially once I get into the shipping and villain love triangles...
This nigga is in a flying turd!
That's all I wanted to say. Peace.
3486030 Independence Day alien dude: "Peace... no peace..."
"What is it you want us to do?"
"Dieeeeeeeeeee..."
3486157 Say it with me:
Giant. Flying. Turd.
Giant. Flying. Turd.
Giant. Flying. Turd.
GIANT FLYING TURD!!!
KAKAROT!
3486177 Where did I get this muffin?
3482197 Have you read some of the abysmal serious stories on here? You know, the ones which are one step away from sparkly vampire ponies and filled with plot holes, terrible cliches, listless OCs, lifeless characterizations, idiot-balling with a wrecking ball, pointless angst... and yet receive acclaim from emo teens with no lives?
I'm rebelling against them! VIVA LE REVOLUTION!!
(This is only the beginning... )
Oh yeah... I need to make the next chapter of this thing.
First, I need to find my notes... which are... somewhere in the giant stack of notes...
3483179 what is the meaning of life?
4162535 Booze?
4162553 jesus bucking christ that was fast!
4162553 jesus bucking christ that was fast!
4162564 I happened to be on at the time.
wow, this borders on fics that should've never been published on this site because quite frankly, it feels as if ponies were added as an afterthought. I dont get it. Like I mentioned before there is zero underlying point, no effort to have it be funny, (this is about on par with a setzer and friedberg movie, or a pauly shore movie). quite frankly this story should stay on fanfiction.net
4621314 There is such a thing as the 'introductory chapter'.
You see, when writing a story properly, you must INTRODUCE YOUR MANE CHARACTERS and then send them into the preliminary or primary setting to establish TONE.
These are things one learns in basic creative writing... at middle school level.
Unlike most fanfics that just cobble together a bunch of random crossover nonsense, I am actually going to take the time to make this a properly constructed tale...
...despite the fact that it's going to be a crazy screwball comedy along the vein of "Blazing Saddles" and "Young Frankenstein"... which I'm sure you deslike because you're not clever enough to grasp the humor.
3486177 I don't get it.
3483336 What's an ABR machine? What does ABR stand for anyway?
5305544 Auditory brain response. We use electrophysiological responses to tones of different frequencies and amplitudes to study mouse hearing and how it's altered by certain mutations in the bone morphogenetic protein pathway via selective knockouts of the BMP receptors utilizing Cre-recombinase/loxP transgenic system for tissue and age-specific expression of the Cre enzyme which site-specifically cuts DNA possessing the loxP sequence.
Is that a shit ship...? amazing.
6902770 Nah, it ended up looking like one because of the lousy paint job and being twisted into a roughly turd-shape by interdimensional black hole cosmic comedic weirdness.
Although, if you're referring to the header image, yes. That is a poop ship. Some little kid posted it to the Interwebs at some point and I couldn't resist adding it... as a symbol of how seriously to take this story.
4622570 I find this absolutely hilarious.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
1:39_5/21/2016
At the moment, I'm reading through Starfall and still got several in my read list to whittle down, but I'm putting this on my future to-do list.
5308725
But have you ever considered you might get the same degradation to their hearing by just popping off a few firecrackers next to thier ears and/or playing them acid rock at concert-level volumes? It'd certainly be a hell of a lot cheaper than going through all that.
True, it might make the standard deviation a bit larger with the hearing losses not being consistent, but with the savings in money, you'd be able to afford a much larger sample population of mice that it would offset the drawback, as well as being able to afford a bigger lab in which to hold them all....
....sort of like going from the Very Small Accelerator to the Large Hadron Colider
3532292
Okay...Sorry Alondro, but I think you missed the point.
Those stories you're referring to which are one step away from sparkly vampire ponies and filled with plot holes, terrible cliches, listless OCs, lifeless characterizations, idiot-balling with a wrecking ball, pointless angst... and yet receive acclaim from emo teens with no lives? They're ALL actually trollfics.
But don't feel so bad. You're not the only one who's missed the point of them being trollfics--so did everyone who upvoted them
7568700 That'd be physical damage versus syndromes with a genetic etiology, which is what we're modeling in that experiment.
Besides which, the exact pathophysiology of sound-based damage is already known. It's a form of excitotoxicity combined with mechanical damage to the hair cells in the Organ of Corti from the pressure waves in the cochlea induced by high-decibel noise tearing them from their contacts
7568900 No... they're not all trollfics. I've read plenty from people who actually believe they're writing on the level of Hemmingway.
There are more than a few genuinely deluded fanfic writers.
7233853 Well, it's true. Too many bad fanfics simply throw a human or crossover character into Equestria within the first paragraph... and frequently NEVER explain how they got there or why, even a million words later. They characterization, if it's even attempted, is bare bones and generally (for crossovers) depends utterly on the fan familiarity with the characters. Someone who's never played "Diablo" (an example I chose because I read exactly one fic with that crossover and had no idea what the hell was going on) would end up utterly confused with the way characters behave and speak, and the references they make to the game's world.
Fanfics as a whole are guilty of this. Most FiM fanfics rely on our own familiarity with the established characters and never properly characterize them such that the story can exist independently as a complete work. This is true of fanfics in most fandoms, in truth. The goal of too many such stories is to rapidly introduce the conflict, throw in as many popular tropes as possible, and shoehorn in a desired climax without regard to how badly it clashes with characterization, cause and effect, and even, frequently, the most basic common sense.
One important thing (out of a list of important things to recall when writing) to keep in mind is this question: "If my story was being read by someone who'd never heard of "My Little Pony", would they be able to believe these characters are genuine and would they be behaving in a manner which plausibly fits their personalities, knowledge, and limitations?"
And two, a character's appearance doesn't mean a damned thing if they act like a cardboard cutout. WHO a character is is vastly more important and, ultimately, more interesting than WHAT a character is.
7569262 Ah. Rgr that.
7569265
Or are they just pretending to believe they're sincere??
(besides, I never considered Hemmingway to be all that great of a writer. Asimov, Braddberry, McCaffery OTOH...)
Well...this is true. There's the two of us, after all
Cheers dudette
122 people who read this fic voted for Hillary.
8236311
8593371 129 now.
8236311
Yikes.
9995012 Wait until 2020. The majority of the USA is now about as PO'd at the Dems as the UK was at the Labor Party.
9995272
Trump doesn’t have the same base Boris has. After impeachment, that’s a permanent black stain on him. Hell, he almost lost to Hillary, probably the downright worst candidate out there. Once all the democrats rally behind one candidate he’ll be gone faster then your head can spin.
9995357 You really haven't been watching the polls...
The majority now KNOW it's a partisan hit job.
Once they see through the lies, it's very hard to trick them again.
The Republican Party is more united than they've EVER been, even under Reagan.
Independents are now 60/40 in favor of Trump. They're FURIOUS at the moderates.
But you see, this was The Plan: to drive the Dems so far left and so radical that NO ONE can deny what they are any longer. And it's not over yet. I have more to do before I finally plunge the dagger into the Dem Party. I will DESTROY THEM UTTERLY, using their own arrogance, elitism, and blinding wrath against them. This will be my greatest troll ever, perhaps the greatest in history.
It's also quite telling that to get the moderate House Dems to vote for it, more than half had to be threatened with facing a primary challenge. Oh, wait... threatening someone unless they vote in the way they want... isn't that extortion? And they Dem leadership is ON RECORD as saying if they don't impeach Trump, he'll win again... so they're forcing their own members to vote for impeachment... to alter the outcome of an election.
See, I can play this game too. And that's just for the opening move.
They've actually handed me one today with Pelosi suggesting delaying the Senate trial. Oh that's glorious! They rush to impeach in the House on the most flimsy charges in history without a single supporting piece of physical evidence and no 1st-hand fact witnesses, then deny Trump his constitutionally-guaranteed right to a trial (which IS hard-set into the impeachment rules).
Plus, they've now given Republicans a solid-gold road map to getting rid of a Dem President on basically nothing whenever there's a Dem Pres and Repubs win the House. They've made certain the executive branch will be under ceaseless assault FOREVER.
Good work, jackasses!
9995680
Good troll. Lot of effort for something so inane and up your own ass.