This is beautiful.

Well, this turned out much better than the image and name might imply. It was the descriptions and comments that drew me into trying to read this, and I have to say I don't regret it :)

:D

What?! No one is being a sanctimonious asshole in the comments? Not possible! Come on people, you can do worse! Pinkiepony it up!

A rapefic with little rape? This is..unnatural... But it feels so...GOOD.

This was amazing!

WOAH

Am I dreaming???
Is this a rapefic I actually don't feel guilty reading?
YAY!

This story got me thinking about 'What would I do in that situation', and ultimately I decided 'I wouldn't have written that I wanted to rape Celestia into 4chan, so it's all moot.', but still, any story that gets me devoting more than a moment's thought is something I really enjoy.

However, the 'Anon' protagonist doesn't share my urge to think hard about his situation. He's portrayed as being completely indifferent to his plight, rising to the level of some sort of suicidal mental disease. He's fetishisticly self-sacrificing, and he doesn't have one scrap of emotion or one insightful thought to contribute to his heroic choice. He just does it like some sort of sanctimoniously moralizing robot. That's not interesting to me. It would have been easy to address too. He could have at least been a little scared. He could have thought about the liklihood that he might die, and what that means. Does he believe in an afterlife? Is he prepared for the end? What is he leaving behind by sacrificing himself for somepony he doesn't even know? He could doubt his decision after making it, he could even change his mind. He could think about why it's worth dying for, and none of these thoughts or feelings or cold sweats or trembles or whimpers or clenched fists or chattering teeth would have needed to change the plot. These details could have been added without having to rework any of the actual events of the plot.

Also when Celestia refused the hug, I was pretty amazed. I thought that a realistic, relatable emotion had entered the story. Of course she's not going to want to be hugged by a near-stranger; not the day after she got raped in the mouth. Nobody would want to be touched after that kind of experience. In fact, he was sociopathically rude for even requesting the hug.

But then, sadly, it turned out that, no, it isn't an example of relatable emotions. She's just grossed out by hands.

She goes on to voluntarily kiss a man immediately after being raped. This represents a pretty fundamental misunderstanding by the author about what rape is. That kind of juvenile portrayal is pretty common among rape fanfiction, which is for better or for worse. Honestly, a serious, mature treatment of the issue of rape is a completely different animal than this, and it's the sort of thing that can be uncomfortable to read, or to write. So I don't expect all stories to be that way. Sometimes this type of story is fine. Sometimes perverts just want to fap to a childish surface representation of a rape scene, and then call it a day, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that in my books :p

Truly, that one is a forgivable sin. Celestia was a flatly written sex object, but at least she wasn't outright boring and confusing, like the Anon.

The concept/situation saves the story for me. It's really interesting. It's a moral conundrum: Rape somepony innocent, or violence will be done to you. It's an interesting one, and a possible wellspring of interesting emotions and conflicts could spring up out of that, but the story adds another twist to the concept: Everyone in that room was the kind of person who cavalierly said on an internet forum that they would love to be a rapist. ! That brings up so much more room for internal conflict. What about the people in that room who didn't actually mean what they said? I bet they're regretting saying it. That sort of thing could ruin a person with guilt (if they go through with it because they're fearful for their safety) And there's even more juicy depth to be plumbed: Celestia knows that she's being raped under threat. She could have an internal struggle whether to condemn and hate her attackers, or to forgive them... that kind of thing could rip her up inside, and provoke some very interesting arguments, especially considering her status as a benevolent loving leader. But instead, that avenue got a really shallow treatment. Luna busts out street justice and starts summary executions, and Celestia does nothing more than waggle a forehoof, tell her she's naughty, and then forget about it forever.

Decent stuff, though. I think I might end up reading the other two chapters just to see where it goes from here.

Lol I love this so far let me check the rest

>No, wait. Ctrl-shift-T
first sentence to a rape clop fic and i learn something new! go figure....

>f5
holy crap this fic is just a treasure trove of keyboard shortcuts isn't it?....

>list of sites
>list of my sites
lol darn you.....

"After twenty-seven times there won't be much left to save for you."

....as if the previous lines weren't funny enough.....
"Twenty-six. When he starts she'll be after twenty-six times," sounded somewhere from the back. After a second of silence, the voice added "Sorry, I have OCD."
HO-LY FUCK DID I LOL......
.....
"I'm dreaming, that's fairly obvious."
"So we're all in a dream?"
"Only I am."
......OH GOD DANMIT , THIS IS ALL JUST TOO FUNNY HOLY FUCK......
"How is she? You had your hands on her."
"Plush. Fluffy."
"Smells like vanilla?"
"No, pretty much scentless."
"Drat. There goes my headcanon." He chuckled."
welp , i guess im not gonna get to clop to this tonight to due all the spontaneous laughter that keeps emitting from me as im reading this :/ .....

"My grin couldn't have gotten any bigger.
Well, Celestia didn't smell like vanilla. Luna did smell like cinnamon though."
D: ? m-my princess of the night doesn't smell like a gentle cool night's breeze , but freaking cinnamon???....

stupid comments can't reply to someone while editing them.....
3475597>> Mercury Zero i disagree , i think this anon not being a self righteous human makes him a more interesting and endearing character and not at all 'robotic' like you suggest.....

while i don't think i would be able to pull that off as i value my own life above all else not for any self righteous reason but rather i just want to be alive , consider one's self being confronted in person with another being who is several orders of magnitude more capable then one's self who influences a great deal more of other's lives and is able to alleviate far more suffering in this universe than one's self ever could , weather they be a mentally and thus technologically advanced alien species or a magical creature like celestia , if they were in peril would one's self be willing to do whatever it would take regardless of the consequences to free said being from said peril?.....

it takes a special kind of value system to be that kind of person , it has been done very well in other media in the past as well , the most notable example that keeps screaming at my mind is danel jackson from stargate , and im pretty sure he's considered to be the most emotional person in sg1 , not a 'robot'.....

uuuhh....don't princesses usually kiss the prince that comes to rescue them?....

also we don't know how much time passed since she was set free , i find it more illogical to suggest that a deity of a celestial body would not be willing to show affection of gratitude to a selfless act than.....whatever it was you might have been suggesting which isn't actually stated in your post.......

"Luna busts out street justice and starts summary executions"

....uuuuh when did this happen?....

"Sick bastards got what they deserved! I was exceptionally merciful leaving over two thirds alive! Even this one had... thoughts about you!"

oh woah wait a minute there , this has to be a mistake , i don't care what the next chapter says about ""I'd totally love to hug Luna."
"You do realize she just killed roughly ten people?" I raised my eyebrows." , by "I was exceptionally merciful leaving over two thirds alive!" she was meaning she wanted to/should have killed over 2/3rds of the humans , actually doing that would just be sick beyond comprehension.....

3476583

I actually don't have a problem with the chacarter's choices. The character's choices don't make him a robot. Being robotic makes him a robot. I said that in my first post too:

These details could have been added without having to rework any of the actual events of the plot.

I really enjoy the choices the character makes. They're meaningful and interesting, and they're fantasy fulfillment too. The guy did what's right despite the terrible risks and dreadful intimidation. The problem for me was that he didn't act that way. He had as much emotion as I use to eat breakfast. He put as much thought into it as I put into 'Pepsi, or Coke?' I honestly wondered the whole time if he was in a dream and he knew he was in a dream, because he was acting like a snarky version of Superman, impervious to all harm, and sanctimoniously blase. It was as though the author was intentionally trying to make me not give a crap about him.

As for this:

don't princesses usually kiss the prince that comes to rescue them?

Yes. That's why I have a problem with it. It's not just cliche and empty, but it also cynically trivializes rape. Like I said, though, I can forgive that one. The premise of the story really makes up for it.

As for what I'd do instead, I don't know if that matters? But strictly academically, I'll say that I'd just have her say no. She's not ready for that.

Then I'd have the main character feel really guilty that he was selfish enough to ask. I would have him realize that getting raped, and then rescued is not romantic. And it's juvenile and revolting to think that way. He would apologize deeply.

But that's just how I would write it :) Like I said, as long as we realize that stories like this aren't realistic in any way, then it's okay to write them and read them. They're just silly fantasies. That part is okay how it is. Having an unrelatable and wooden main character, however, is not nearly as forgivable.

http://cdn.smosh.com/sites/default/files/bloguploads/creepy-stare-cage.jpg

Ok, i enjoy this. I was skeptical at first due to the title and cover photo, but due to the description, I gave it a shot and im not dissapointed. So far this is amazing. Im going to read the next to chapters with even more vigor. Thank you.

Celestia: "but
I’m finding your species... particularly
unattractive. It’s your hands, they creep
me out a little. Actually, more than a
little."

lyra have a diferent opinion about that

This is amazing I love how you started it as rape, but turned it into something else, and... well... not rape. I like where its heading and will read on with a smile!

also: I very much agree with shadowx, (second to last comment on the bottom) and his reason for reading this. I don't think I would have if not for your description! very good sir!

In my headcanon Luna smells like black cherry.

This story is so meta but at the same time... not meta. It's cool.

fuck you victor your gay

Woona is adorable. So is Celly.