Humans Assemble: Equestrian Boys

by Mistershield

Chapter 6- Edited

Chapter 6

“Well, you look strange,” Sephiroth stepped up to Kratos. Both former demi-humans looked at each other.

“Indeed. If we run into the others, they will never recognize us,” Kratos frowned. “And we have no way to know if they changed as well...”

“Should we go back then? It seems that wandering around without a plan may prove to be difficult.” Sephiroth looked around, spotting that there was no signs of danger. Or a fire, which was a good sign considering Dan was around here somewhere.”

“Hmm...” Kratos looked around. “I think we should look around a bit and then decide. No harm in a quick scouting mission. It beats waiting around doing nothing.”

“I agree. We should change out attire though. If we run into the others, they may not recognize us.” Sephiroth looked around, and found a drama geek dressed in black. “Give me your clothes.”

Kratos wasted no time to confront a female cheerleader. “Surrender your skirt.”

“Why?!” The student asked, shivering a bit.

“So I may wear it.”

__________________________________________

“I told you this was a bad idea!”

“Shut up, you! He needs to learn this!”

“Oh, I think you are too hard on him...”

“Discipline! I know I don’t use it, but how do you expect him to learn to grab a truck and drive into an airplane?”

Teenpool looked over at the people arguing as he was supposed to be getting a driving lesson. Amazing though, that the voices arguing were coming from his dad. Over in the passenger seat, Deadpool had a map in one hand, and a chimichanga in the other. For once though, they were dressed in their civies. He was wearing a blue hawaiian shirt and a tutu, with tap dancing shoes. Teenpool was wearing his school uniform, blue blazer and pants as usual. Both had blonde hair, and Deadpool had not bothered to hide his scarred ridden face. The teen was going to school for once, so their red and black outfits were in the backseat, holding balloons. You know, for camouflage.

Deadpool turned to look over at his son, releasing a sigh. He loved teens! So rebellious, so anarchanitic, so anti-establishment! Where did he go wrong?! Why was his son such a goody goody honors student?! Well, at least his son relented and agreed to drive the family battle van. “Look son, you are never going to get a hang of the family business if you insist on following every single flipping rule in the book!”

“Seatbelts, dad...” Teenpool sighed.

“Tell me you got at least a handgun and a knife-”

“Move it!”

“Huh?” Deadpool and Teenpool both turned to look as a young teenage girl open the door to the driver’s side. A girl with purple hair and a look of rage on her face. “Twilight? Is that you?”

“Connor?” Twilight raised both eyebrows to spot father and son. “I thought you passed your driver exam.” Her look of rage was calmed a moment as she peeked into the van and spotted the balloons.

“I need to get a CDL license for the-”

“Okay! We are in the... van? Go Twilight!” Sokka called out as the other doors started to open, Little Strongheart, Samus, Lyra and Octavia jumped in, making any circus clown proud.

“Who are you, kids?” Deadpool asked, turning to look as the teens started to put on seatbelts. He decided to like them, why couldn’t his son go carjacking more? Upon inspecting them, he guessed they were cheerleaders. Well, some of them at least. Nice legs... Snap out of it Deadpool! Are you going to let these kids steal your livelihood? The only reason he let them live though, was he didn’t want to clean the van. Then there was that thing that they knew his boy. Come to think of it...“And, are any of you dating my boy?”

“I am!” Vinyl called out as she got in the van also. Deadpool turned to look at her, eyebrows raised.

“Hm. She doesn’t look wild enough. I refuse to let you date her.”

“Dad! We’ve been dating for over 3 months!” Teenpool called out, getting his mask to place it over his face. Something told him he was going to need it. Deadool got a spare mask to don on as well.

“We can talk about this later. Party time!”

“Wait, you don’t go to our school...” Samus turned to look at Vinyl. The DJ shrugged.

“Nevermind!” Twilight shoved Teenpool into the side with his dad. “We need to drive!”

“Wait, can you drive, Twilight?” Toph asked, pushing aside the balloons.

“I got a permit!” Twilight shouted as he revved the engine to life.

“But this is a CDL plate van!” Connor/Teenpool called out.

“Now this one, you can date. She has balls!” Deadpool smiled under his mask.

_________________________________________

“Where to, Bub?”

Both Travis and Terra were sitting down in the backseat of the taxi, settling themselves in. Travis had the great idea to grab a cab, and find a bus rental place. The taxi driver was a short stocky man, with a weird set of black mutton chops and hairdo. Weird things on his knuckles, but the assassin didn’t think to enquire or think twice about it. This place had weird skinned humans with strange colored hair, so who knows what else was up. According to the license, the driver’s name was ‘Logan.’

“We need to rent a bus, so-”

“Oh hey, you aren’t up to anything funny with the young lady?” Logan turned his back to look over at the two. He wore a brown jacket over a red shirt. “I’m not accusing you of anything, but in my line of work...”

“She’s one of my students, ok?” Travis frowned. “We just need to get a bus for our school.”

“Really? Don’t you schools book a bus in advance?”

“We had a-”

“Look, not like it’s any of your business, but our school doesn’t use busses.” Travis sighed, moving in to cut Terra.

“How do you know that?” Terra asked, turning to look back at Travis. The assassin raised his wallet and phone up.

“Been looking through my contacts and my wallet for any contacts or business cards for any numbers to busses.” Travis placed his things away in his jacket to look back at Logan. “Not one. Which means our school lost our last contract place-”

“Or you guys are from some schools that get those fancy shmancy charter busses with air conditioning.” Logan turned back to look at his wheel. “Some kind of emergency at school then?”

“I hope not.” Terra added.

“Well, you two seem like ok guys, so I’m not gonna pry anymore,” Logan smiled at them through the view lens. Thanks to them being from a different world, Travis and Terra were clean from blood and weapon smells. “Well, I’m in the biz, so I know a guy I can recommend.”

“That’s great, uh, Logan, right? We are a bit-”

“Get out of the way!”

“What the?” The people in the cab looked to their left, spotting Twilight driving the Deadpool van. Deadpool has his upper body sticking out of the driver’s seat, yelling into the air and making siren sounds. Terra and Travis looked at each other, eyebrows raised a bit. Terra mouthed “Was that Twilight?” Travis though, mouthed Was that Deadpool?“

“What the-” Logan blinked twice at the van.

“Logan, I can’t believe I am saying this- But follow that van!” Travis pointed out.

“You got it, Bub!” Logan called out as he placed his seatbelt on. Soon enough, the taxi took off.

_________________________________________

“What was that yelling?” Discord asked, lifting his left eyebrow? It sounded so girly... Vice-Principal Luna and Principal Discord turned to look out the window. Discord opened his mouth as it found out is was Soma, yelling like a girl.

“Pinkie Pie? Is she trying to get volunteers to decorate the gym by force once again?”

Discord turned to look back at Luna, eyebrows raised. What?

_________________________________________

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

“Come back! I just want to be friends!”

Soma desperately ran for his life, bolting through the emergency door leading out of the gym and into the entrance leading to the outdoor sport areas. Both of his eyebrows were raised, mouth open in panic as he screamed for his dear life. Dan was going to unleash unspeakable and unrelenting pain on his form. Dracula, the monsters of Castlevania, even Julius Belmont didn’t scare him. But they had never seen a furious Dan.

“Oh, hey, I’m sorry if I came on too strong!” Pinkie frowned, but easily still running after the teen. “Can’t we talk about this?”

Dovahkiin burst through the doors, looking around for them. He was not a fast guy, and those two took off like arrows from a bow. “Soma! Pinkie!”

“Dovah?” Ralph turned to look at the pair that was running. He had spotted the third, and approached him.

“Ralph? Where’s Phoenix?”

_________________________________________

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Phoenix yelled out, running through the park with a pissed off Rainbow Dash on his heels.

“Come back here!” RD yelled out, amazed how this bookworm was able to outrun her. And he had a nice butt...

“Phoenix?” Number One raised his head, turning to look away from the stunts.

“Rainbow Dash?” Scootaloo called out, blinking twice. The Cutie Marks and the Kids Next Door calmed down, turning to look at the couple. They turned to look at each other a moment.

“Adults,” Number Four mumbled under his voice.

“Yeah, we better save them...” Number Two added.

“We better lead them back to the school,” Sweetie suggested.

_________________________________________

“What’s going on out there?” Fluttershy asked, turning to look out the window. She stood up, and peeked her head out. Dan stirred a bit, hearing the yelling. Both of his eyes opened at once, and he sat up in shock to quickly look around.

“What is that-”

And stuff his face into Fluttershy’s rear, under her skirt. Still shock by what was going on, both of his hands moved to grab Fluttershy’s ass and squeeze, trying to pry her off her. Her small, firm, and squishy cheeks. Fluttershy went still a moment, her cheeks turning red before she finally screamed when she realized what was going on.

“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

_________________________________________

“The hell was that?!” Nate opened his eyes, looking up. Just a second ago, he had been tracking another yell, only to hear another. The plan was to escort Rarity to the park, but they stopped at the sounds of a scream.

“Fluttershy?!” Rarity called out, lifting her head up to look over at the window. The couple turned to look at a blushing Fluttershy as she released a moan.

“Dan, please! Not now!” Fluttershy pleaded. “This feels so good....”

“Did you say Dan?” Nate asked, mouth opening in shock.

________________________________________

“Vice-Principal Luna!”

“What now?” Discord asked, turning his head over to look behind himself. Luna also turned to look at the student at the door.

“What is it Applejack?”

“I was kissed by-” AJ suddenly spotted Distant Star, and blushed.

“Is this about the kiss you had with Dovah?”

“GOOTAGOCANTSTAYDIDNTCOUNTBYE!” AJ screamed out as she raced out the door.

“What kiss?” Luna asked.

_________________________________________

“Halt!” Wesker called out. His left hand was out, spotting a van racing towards him, with the right hand reaching for a gun that was simply not there. “Goddamnit...” He mumbled in a low voice. What was going to do, whistle at them really hard? “Stop, you crazy teen!” The van only honked in response. Everyone in the street looked around, shocked by what was going on in their town. Wesker had to jump and roll to the side, barely dodging the high speed vehicle.

“Sorry!” Twilight called out as she sped past the rolling officer.

“I’m not!” Deadpool called out. Somehow, he managed to get a sigh on top of his van that read “Student Driver” written in black marker.

“What the?” Wesker managed to raised his head, coming to a stop next to the curb. A taxi raced passed him.

“We got a van and a taxi going off at high speed!” Wesker called out into his radio. “Please advise!”

”Did you get the plates officer?” The radio responded. “Is anyone hurt?”

“I didn’t get the can, but the taxi number was 636,” Wesker frowned as he stood up slowly. “And no one was hurt, but I had to roll through the sidewalk to get out of the way...”

“Do not pursue, I repeat, do not persue. Unless you can get a vehicle. Now putting an APB on the taxi.”

“Roger,” Wesker called out. Not used to this weak body, he placed a bit of strain on the muscles. Thanks to the dancing, he had at least stretched. Who knew that would have saved his life? Huh? He spotted some vomit on the street. Gross.

Proofreaded by LyonAzakura.

Bonus:

“What is going on out there?” Sunset asked. Otacon shrugged, not sure what was going on either. Both moved to the window and looked out the window.

“Nate?” Otacon called out.

“Otacon?” Nate responded.

“Rarity?” Sunset questioned.

“Sunset?” Rarity asked, a bit bothered by the drama queen.

“Rarity?” Fluttershy timidly called out.

“Fluttershy?” Sunset responded.

“Nathan?” Dan poked his head next to Fluttershy.

“Dan?” Nate tilted his head to the side.

“Nathan?” Sephiroth asked as he walked in with Kratos.

“Sephiroth?” Nate turned to look at the two.

“Kratos?” Dan turned to look at the other guy. In the cheerleading skirt.

“Sephiroth?” Otacon chimed in.

“Dan?” Kratos turned to look up.

“Donkey!”

Extra:

“Thank you for not giving me any more jump scares, Stefano.”

“Stop calling me that, Pewdiepie...” Alucard responded from his dark portal. “And don’t thank me just yet...”

“What do you mean?” Pewdiepie blinked once, as Alucard laughed and vanished with is portal.

“What was that...” The youtuber turned to look around himself. He was in front of a high school. “What’s so bad-”

“Pewdiepie!”

“Fangirls!” At once, the Sweden was assaulted by his fans.

Alucard could only laugh. “Now for that judge thing.”

Author's Note:

It continues....

Comments

[Moongaze14]

Thank god for this chapter. The guys are joining together, Wolverine appears, Twilight is in road rage, a horny Fluttershy, a flustered AJ, and a pursuing RD appear. What more can a fan of this story ask?

[Dirty Bit]

This chapter was all over the place and I love it

[UNITLuna004]

I laughed my ass off reading this! Good job, man! Can't wait for more.

[TheGrimColt]

absolutely loved this chapter shield keep up the fantastic work XD

[ButtonMash]

This should update REALLY soon.

[The REAL Mister Pkmn]

The extra portion was hilarious. Pewdiepie deserves that hell. After all, he purposefully broke a Diamond Play Button!