Fluttershy had seen something shoot across the sky, and crash with great force and velocity. When she went to investigate, she found Luna amongst the crater. When she got close the crater gave off a bright light, and switched Luna’s and Fluttershy’s consciousnesses. After the switch had occurred, the object had disappeared. Now Luna and Fluttershy have to figure out how to get back to normal; while conquering their profound situation.
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Interesting story sir. let's see where it goes.
-RD
I DEMAND THEE TO MADE MORE OF THEE STORY
3010991
Holy smokes man, I wasn't expecting a comment so fast. I guess you are the fastest flier in all of Equestria! Thank you very much for the comment.
3011026
Oh dear...high demand and no supply. I'm in trouble. Seriously though probably won't see another chapter for like two weeks to a month. Thanks for the comment though; it really means a lot.
You seem to have mixed up their and they're. But otherwise I didn't notice much.
Also, since you've gone from the present to a memory, I suggest putting a separator of some sort to distinguish between them.
Like,
I assume the memory starts off in the second paragraph I've quoted, so I put the hyphens right above that to distinguish between past and present, otherwise it might get a little confusing.
Anyway, i'll move on the next chapter, I like this so far!
>confidentially
I think you meant confidently xD
Confidentially has a whole other meaning to it.
But I eagerly await more!
3055339
Thank you very much for pointing out my errors. I've gone ahead and changed them, and used your suggestion for the break in the beginning of the story.
I'm pretty disappointed with myself that I missed those; but perhaps it's because I re-wrote the entire first chapter three times.
I also do recall when I was writing out the part of the story using the word confidentially instead of confidently. The spell check came up and said it was spelt wrong; so I just chose the first thing on the list of suggestions. (I write everything in MS Word.) Also it was probably four in the morning ha-ha.
Seriously though thank you very much. I probably wasn't going to re-read it any time soon so that's a big help. The fact that you pointed out my errors, gave me a favorite, and your following me, means a lot. So again, thank you.
Have super-duper awesome fantastic day!