Chasing Dreams

by Final Draft

Chapter Four-Clean Up At Register Six

Dream Chaser was pulled out of his fantasy by the sound of some pony clearing her throat loudly. He opened his eyes to see a mare looking at him impatiently, and he realized he was still standing in the door way.

“Oops, sorry,” he apologized, limping out of her way. She ignored him, turning her nose up and walking out with her basket of groceries. He must have looked homeless to her, what with the dried blood under his nose and a dirty trench coat that was too large for him. The doors closed behind her and Dream Chaser returned to his mission.

Taking the least-crowded aisles, he made his way to the pharmacy at the back of the store, still dragging his unwilling leg. The pharmacist pony he knew as Cotton Ball looked past her clipboard as he approached and nearly dropped it when she saw him limping.

“Mr. Chaser! Are you alright?” she asked, running from behind the counter to his side, trying to support him. She smelled of rubbing alcohol and latex, reminding him of his extensive stays in hospital wards and operating rooms.

“I’m fine, really,” he said, trying to walk on his own. “I’m just here to pick up my prescriptions.” She insisted on leading him to the counter, and once she was sure he was okay to stand, she darted to the back room of the pharmacy. He expected her to return with his meds, but before he realized it, she was dabbing at his bruised nose with a moist cloth.

“Did you fall again? Why aren’t you using the braces we gave you? You’re so skinny, have you even been eating? Do you need me to throw in some multivitamins?” she continued badgering him, acting like his mother used to. Once she had gotten the dried blood out from under his nose, she stared into his eyes, her light blue eyes full of concern. “And you haven’t been sleeping either…*sigh*…What am I going to do about you?”

She shook her head as she walked back behind the counter and disposed of the cloth. He could hear the sound of pill containers rattling as she rummaged through an unseen basket of prescriptions in the back room. When she returned, she held a large white prescription bag in her mouth and placed it on the counter.

“Let’s see,” she said, looking at the label on the bag. “Your doctor upped the Altrivin dosage at your request. There are refills here for the Dosanel, the Tovale, the Cinelin, the Gazinor, and the Onafloxdant.” He didn’t care about the last five so long as he had his Altrivin, the painkiller.

“Thank you,” he said as she slid the bag towards him. “Oh yes, can I get a basket too? I need to grab some other things while I’m here,” he said, remembering his need for a new bathroom light bulb. She dropped her head below the counter and came back up with a basket in her teeth. As he placed the medicine in the basket, another box fell in: multivitamins, tossed in by Cotton Ball. She smiled at him innocently as he grabbed the basket and limped away.

Keeping his head down, he made his way to the housewares aisle, listening to his uneven hoof beats against the linoleum floor. Where there should have been a fourth beat, there was the sliding noise of his horseshoe. It felt and sounded like he was dragging a ball and chain behind him. He thought about taking a few Altrivin right there, or even try a Cinelin, the muscle relaxant, to help quell the pain and try to get his fourth leg working again.

Best not to get doped up in public, he decided to himself, as he finally reached the housewares aisle. He scanned the shelves, reading the tags in front of the items, trying to find the one bulb that actually fit the primitive socket in his bathroom. At the end of the bottom shelf, under a layer of dust sat the box he was looking for. He dusted it off the best he could, and after making sure it was the correct bulb, placed it into the basket next to the multivitamins. He looked at them, then to each end of the aisle, making sure no pony was around, before taking the multivitamins out, leaving them on the shelf.

On his way up to the registers, Dream Chaser had to take a detour around two house mares who were taking up the width of an entire aisle, gossiping. He found himself in the produce section and felt his stomach growl. His breakfast of oats could only hold him over for so long and he wandered toward the fruit section. A mechanical display of an orange earth pony bucking an apple tree caught his eye and he walked towards it.

He watched for a few moments as the cardboard pony bucked the fake tree, causing the apples on it to fall a short distance, before being brought back up by the strings connecting them. A single bag of Sweet Apple Acres Apples sat in the bucket below the display. After making sure they weren’t bruised, he threw them in his basket. It had been a while since he’d had apples, and especially after the incident on the coach, he thought he deserved a little treat.

The checkout lanes were crowded and Dream Chaser stood in the one he hoped would move the quickest. Of course, he had chosen the lane with the trainee cashier and the mare redeeming a thousand coupons. He set the basket on the floor as his jaw grew tired and reached into his coat pocket for his coin pouch. The medicine was always forty bits, the bulb was five, and the apples wouldn’t exceed five bits, so he rummaged through the coins until he found a fifty bit piece. If it was less, he wouldn’t worry about the change – he just wanted to get out of there. The line finally began moving, so he sealed his coin pouch and tossed it back into his pocket.

Several ponies from other lines got behind him when they saw his line moving and he glanced back at them. They were typical city ponies, looking impatient and like they had better things to be doing than wait in a line. The stallion behind him made eye contact and cleared his throat loudly. Dream Chaser turned back around: he was finally at the register. A young earth pony with glasses and a face riddled with acne took the items out of his basket and ran it over the scanner. It beeped with each pass of the three items and the pony clumsily bagged them, putting the apples on top of the light bulb.

“Will that be all, sir?” the cashier asked in a nasally voice. Dream Chaser nodded and placed the fifty bit piece on the counter. The cashier hadn’t noticed because he was too busy pushing buttons on his machine. “All right, that will be eighty-four bits.”

Dream Chaser had been in the process of picking up his bag, almost dropping it when he heard his total. The cashier noticed the fifty bit piece on the counter and picked it up, staring at it for a moment, then looking at Dream Chaser.

“That can’t be right,” Dream Chaser protested, looking in his bag at his three items. “How much was my prescription?” The cashier pushed a button and his machine spat out a receipt.

“Forty bits, and uh, five for the bulb, and thirty-nine bits for them apples,” the cashier read from the receipt. It took Dream Chaser a moment to process what he just heard.

“No, that can’t be right,” Dream Chaser repeated, shaking his head. He could feel the ponies behind him glaring.

“I don’t make the prices, sir. I just work here,” the cashier replied as professionally as he could. He tapped on the counter next to the fifty bit piece, silently demanding more money. Dream Chaser thought about putting the apples back, but didn’t want to lose his place in line and have to limp all the way back to produce, so he begrudgingly reached into his coat pocket for his coin pouch. When he had put it back after removing it the first time, it had landed upside-down. This time when he went to take it out, the opening was facing down. As he took it out of his pocket, the pull-string loosened, emptying the contents onto the floor.

The sound of coins bouncing off the linoleum drew the attention of every pony around, and Dream Chaser felt the heat of their eyes on him. He threw himself to the floor, trying to stop the rolling coins, but there were too many. A few ponies that had already checked out walked over and tried to help, but he snapped at them.

“No! I’ve got it! I’m fine!” he shouted at them. They looked at him in shock and backed away. He spent several minutes collecting the coins, swatting at the hooves of any pony who tried to help him. Employees and customers just watched him with pity; a few whispered his name to each other. A cashier who had been on break walked over to the empty register across from Dream Chaser’s lane and turned on the dome light, silently beckoning to the customers who had been behind him.

He listened to the beeps of items being rung up and the quiet whispering of the employee-customer interactions. He watched the customers’ hooves tenderly step around his coin spill as they left the supermarket. Twenty customers had gone around him in the time it had taken to pick up all the coins. When he stood up, a manager had replaced the cashier who had rung him up initially.

“Sir, eighty four bits please,” the stallion said, not breaking eye contact. Dream Chaser slid the thirty-four bits he’d left out of the pouch across the counter. The manager dropped them into the till and closed the drawer. “Have a nice day,” he said slowly, still maintaining eye contact.

“Thank you,” Dream Chaser said quietly, grabbing his purchases and limping toward the automatic door. The pimply cashier, who had initially started his transaction, was now putting out wet floor signs around the pressure pad. Several soaking-wet ponies had entered the store a few moments before and had shaken off under the industrial fan.

“Watch your step sir,” the cashier said as Dream Chaser approached. He could just picture it: his hooves going out from underneath him, his bag flying into the air, the light bulb shattering on the floor, the apples rolling everywhere, his pill containers spilling their contents… just icing on the cake that had been his day so far. Fortunately, he didn’t slip and he made it to the pressure pad incident-free. As the door slid open, he could see that rain was now falling heavily; another perfect example of how things could always get worse for him.

He trudged through the streets, back towards the coach stop. Even if his knee had loosened up, there was no way he was walking home in this weather. He could see the coach stallions in their bright-yellow rain ponchos, taking a break under an over-hang, while the coach was being boarded; at least he hadn’t missed it.

The line to board moved painstakingly slow, as ponies fought over seating, none of them wanting to walk in the downpour. Outside the coach, he could hear the crying of foals, in addition to the general din of over-crowded public transportation. When he finally got inside, he carefully removed two bits from his pocket, dropped them inside the collection box and turned to look at the sea of ponies.

The maximum capacity for the coach was fifty; however, it was apparent that the actual number of ponies easily exceeded that. Those who could squeeze two to a seat did so, while the remainder of the ponies stood in the aisle, through the whole length of the coach. Dream Chaser thought about getting off and waiting for the next coach, but he’d already paid his fare, and wasn’t about to lose more money.

Even if there was a spot in the back of the coach, he wouldn’t get to it and he didn’t see any openings in the front. More ponies were trying to crowd onto the coach behind him, and he looked around frantically, panicking. To his immediate left was the handicap seat – a seat he’d never considered sitting in before. He never wanted to think of himself as handicapped, but with his leg as it was right now… Clearly, it would work in his favor to do so today. A capable-looking unicorn was sitting in it, trying not to look at Dream Chaser, obviously aware he didn’t belong sitting there.

“Excuse me,” Dream Chaser said, setting his bag down. The unicorn ignored him, pretending he hadn’t heard him. Dream Chaser decided to take a page from everyone else’s book: clearing his throat loudly and glaring at the unicorn, getting his attention. Dream Chaser silently motioned to the handicapped sign above the seat and the unicorn followed his gaze.

“Yeah?” the unicorn said, looking back down at Dream Chaser. “What of it?” Dream Chaser was holding up the line and growing angry at the unicorn’s ignorance, so he grabbed his coat-tail and exposed his mutilated legs. The unicorn saw the scarred cutie mark, and looked at Dream Chaser’s face with sudden realization. “Dream Chaser!” he gasped, his voice barely audible. He stood up as fast as he could and pushed through the ponies in the aisle, trying to get to the back of the bus.

Dream Chaser let his coat tail fall back down, grabbed his bag, and took his seat. The line behind him had cleared¬¬– the ponies behind him had backed out in order to wait for the next coach. The doors closed and the stallions struggled to get the coach moving, as Dream Chaser watched the scenery slowly start rolling by.

Apart from an occasional whisper or the creak of the suspension, the coach was quiet as it was led through the city. Dream Chaser rested his head against the window and tuned out the whispering of the ponies behind him. He breathed out and his breath fogged the window, obscuring his view. As he went to clear it, his hoof hovered for a moment then drew a circle, then a star, then several lines. Then, more circles. It was a pattern he’d traced a hundred times or more, much to Dream Catcher’s amusement. They used to just lie there; not saying anything, just enjoying each other’s company, and

Dream Chaser would run his hoof up and down her leg, outlining her cutie mark.
When he was finished, his hoof paused for a moment before wiping away the pattern. He watched as ponies scampered through the streets, trying to protect themselves from the rain, with some looking up at the coach in envy as it passed by, full of dry ponies. Yes, they may have been dry ponies, but they were ponies that were growing anxious with every passing moment spent in the confined space of the carriage.

They reached their first stop and more than half the coach emptied, making the suspension creak as it rose back up. Dream Chaser continued staring out the window, looking at the bright displays of the food district. The Alicorn Palace’s gold lettering was shining high above the roofs of the other restaurants; it was a place he had always wanted to take Dream Catcher, but they never had enough money. He sighed heavily and the window fogged up again.

“Hey, I’m sorry,” a voice from behind him said. He turned to see the unicorn he’d taken his seat from standing in the aisle.

“I’m sorry I made you move,” Dream Chaser apologized. “You want your seat back?”

“No, no, no,” he replied, a bit embarrassed. “Can we…just talk?”

“I’m really not in the mood,” Dream Chaser said in all honesty. The unicorn looked hurt at hearing his response and his ears folded back. The seat across the aisle had freed up and the unicorn took his seat there, looking out the window nostalgically, just like Dream Chaser had been doing. The doors closed and the coach lurched forward, leaving the bright lights of the food district behind.

“You know, I was there that day,” the unicorn said, staring out the window. It took Dream Chaser a moment to realize he was talking to him. “It’s not right what happened to you. Nova Star only won because he—”

“Enough!” Dream Chaser interrupted. The unicorn looked over in surprise, but Dream Chaser refused to meet his eyes, and instead, continued staring out the window.

“Sorry,” the unicorn said, looking back out his window. They stayed quiet for the rest of the trip, listening to the falling raindrops on the roof. When the coach reached the next stop, the unicorn got up to leave. He stood in the aisle and looked at Dream Chaser, clearly wanting to say something, but he couldn’t seem to find the right words. Other ponies were trying to get off the coach and they stood behind him impatiently, wondering what the hold up was.

Unable to find the right words, the unicorn just sank his head down and walked out into the rain. He looked up at Dream Chaser, stopping outside his window for a moment, and then disappeared into the crowd of ponies.

Aside from a colt and his marefriend getting a little too intimate in the back of the coach, Dream Chaser was the only pony still riding. He yawned and stretched his arms above his head, finding himself very tired all of a sudden. The handicap seat was a lot more comfortable than the other seats in the coach and he sunk back into the cushioning. His stop, the last stop, was still quiet a distance away and he closed his eyes for a quick nap.

Comments

[lordvad3r95]

Okay, here's my opinion: I like this story. Quite a bit, in fact. I like how the plot is paced, I like the main character so far, and the way it's set up makes me want to find out what happened at that race even more. Some of the sentences are worded rather oddly though, like this one from the first chapter:

But the competition did matter and it did exist and one by one the other racers passed him.

See what I mean? It feels kinda' choppy, and a little shortening up would probably do it some good, but on the whole, this a relatively small matter. You have earned yourself another stalker, and I look forward to seeing more of this story.

[Venomous Woe]

Well sir, you have my attention. :P

This story's actually pretty good. Outstanding even. It's mechanically solid, the imagery is captivating, the story's premise is interesting, and I enjoyed the interaction between the characters.

I usually have criticisms for the stories I read here, but I can't really come up with anything for this one. I bend my knee to you. Liked and favorited.

[Final Draft]

2834652 Wow great criticism, thank you! Yeah I see that and I'll fix it tomorrow. I'll do my best to please all of my Stalkers

[GAPDashie]

Props to you. Grammar is tight, plot and pacing are excellent, and you've made an intriguing OC. Other than some awkward phrasing in a few places, not much to complain about. Find more groups to drop this in, it definitely deserves more views.

Thumbs up, can't wait for more.

[Final Draft]

2854338 Thank you very much for the proofread! I'd like to address a couple points so it's a little less confusing and I'll get right on fixing things.

- Your story introduction is a bit long. If you want more people to take a look at it, you should make it a bit more simple and to the point, without revealing any plot (tee hee).

*I'm definitely taking this advice and I'll begin working on a new description right away. It was a bit difficult to describe this Story in so few words which is where I had a bit of trouble.

- DON'T EVER MIX THE SAD AND TRAGIC TAGS! I'm serious man, those two cannot mix after reading the story, I think the one you should put back is tragedy. The definition of a tragedy is when in the end of the story you feel that either somepony has failed in his task, or been treated unfairly, or had to make a choice which had an inevitably tragic end. I really don't like advertizing my own poison, but if you want a really good example of a tragedy read the fanfic titled “Royal Tears”. By the end of the story, the reader realizes that no matter what happened, one pony had to die.

*The Story is Sad so I guess I'll remove the Tragic tag. (Though I can't reveal too much about the plot, but you'll be surprised.)

- The cover image should be eye catching and relevant to the story (your's is relevant but doesn't exactly catch one's eye). There is a group on FimFic.net that specializes in giving stories covers, it's called "Art for Fanfiction".

Currently I'm waiting for money to transfer to Paypal and I'll be getting a commission from http://spittfireart.deviantart.com/ which will be anywhere from $75-$100 since I want a really nice Cover for the Story. The one that's being used right now is just a temporary until my money transfers to my Paypal so I can get the commission.

As for the Grammar thank you very much for finding all the mistakes! I'll get to editing right away

[TheRussianBrony]

2854338
$75-$100! Holy shit, that's like 9 bottles of vodka. That could provide me sustenance for a month. Damn, kudos though, that's dedication. I just put on my best "sleuth" impression and approach my female friend, who happens to be very talented.

--TheRussianBrony

[Final Draft]

2861040 I know a few Artists but the one I found is by far more talented. I have very high hopes for this Story and I'd like a cover that'd draw people who see it in. After this there are a few other Stories I'd like to work on. What do you think of Grimm Fairy tales with Ponies? :)

[TheRussianBrony]

2861377
Go for it.

--TheRussianBrony