Last Hope

by yoshiXII

Realization

Rarity smiled at her lover as they lay there drenched in sweat. She relished in the moment, even though she knew they would leave soon. She looked sadly as they both turned into black specks.

Once their entire body turned into the specks, it hovered there for a second before darting back into the white sky, vanishing.

Rarity opened her eyes.

“Dammit, Agent Gems, this was your last victim.”

She sighed. She knew what was coming.

Applejack looked to see that they were sitting in a table outside an eerily vacant restaurant that still had its staff waiting inside peering anxiously at them. The moon shone brightly on their position at the top of the hill. She looked to the table right next to them to see the stallions.

There were two of them sitting there while four ponies lay unconscious on the ground between them. Doctor Whooves and Prince Blueblood. They gazed expectantly at Rarity and Applejack.

Applejack glanced back to Rarity and was shocked to see her sobbing. “It wasn’t meant to be this way!” Rarity yelled.

“You knew fully well what the deal entailed,” the Doctor stated monotonously.

“I’m sorry Applejack,” Rarity said softly.

“Ah, I see you didn’t tell her yet,” Prince Blueblood chimed in.

Applejack looked furiously at them. “Ah ain’t gonna let you two hurt her.”

“This wasn’t part of the deal. You said that if I did your bidding, that my friends would be unscathed. Then you send me her.” Rarity waved at Applejack.

“After Applejack, we would’ve left you alone,” the Doctor said. “Think of it as a final test of your loyalty to us. And you were so close. All you had to do was keep silent for the rest of your life.”

Applejack looked between them in bewilderment. “What was the deal? And why are there bodies on the ground?”

“We dispatched these ‘bodyguards’ Rarity sent after us.” Prince Blueblood looked bored, checking his hoof. “I still can’t believe she wouldn’t tell you the truth. Rarity would you like to do the honors?”

Rarity shot daggers at them. Then, she turned around to look at Applejack. Her eyes were bloodshot and her mane was ruffled. “I’m sorry, Applejack.” She gazed downwards at the table.

“You see, I accepted the deal. I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t want my friends to get hurt.” Rarity’s words came out in a rush.

“Slow down there,” Applejack said, “What was the deal?”

Rarity winced. “The deal was...to kill ponies. I was their assassin.”

Applejack’s eyes widened. “Why would you do that?”

“I didn’t know better. They promised me that they would not have you guys killed. They needed me because they wanted a witness. I would go on dates with a stallion and the waiter would implant the poison in the drink. I would merely say that the pony had a heart attack. I was actually one of many mares to do this since they didn’t want it to be conspicuous.

“When I said that they contacted me a few days ago, that was a lie. It was a year ago. I’ve been doing this for an entire year. I’ve seen...twelve ponies killed.”

Rarity closed her eyes, knowing that Applejack would be repulsed by the mare she loved. But when she opened her eyes again, she found understanding in Applejack’s eyes. “Ah believe you, Sugarcube. What you did was honorable.”

Then her eyes turned steely as she faced the stallions. “But why did you guys want to kill ponies in the first place?”

“Applejack, there’s an entire business for this,” Doctor Whooves explained. “Rich ponies pay us handsomely to exterminate a select few ponies like you. Some stallions known as Flim and Flam want you dead because you are the leader of Sweet Apple Acres. With their primary competitor out of the way, they would take over the farm through various contracts and start a monopoly. Our industry is known to many ponies who know to dig deep for information. We have thrived for centuries this way. It’s what comes natural to us.

“But tell me Rarity, what were you planning on doing?”

“Since you signed me up for Applejack, I went into a rage. How could they sign me up to witness my own friend being killed? So I paid some bodyguards and explained my story to Applejack. I wanted help the rest of my friends too, but...I was afraid for Applejack. I should’ve known the bodyguards wouldn’t stand a match against you guys.”

Prince Blueblood smiled. “Ah, love. How blind it makes ponies. I remember spreading the rumor of Napoleon’s wife. Quite the impact, though not as much as I expected.”

Applejack stood up and walked to Rarity, holding her head against her chest. Rarity’s tears were dried by the hair. “Ah don’t get it. Why didn’t you just kill all six of us at once to get me?”

Doctor Whooves chuckled. “Believe me when I say this, Applejack. We actually have morals. We want to spare as many lives as possible.”

“Jus’ how many of you folk are there?”

The Doctor counted in his head. “Around forty.”

They stood there in silence, contemplating what it all meant. It seemed as though the nighttime creatures were quiet as well. It was as if time stood still.

“So what’s going to happen to us, then?” Rarity asked muffled, not wanting to know the answer.

“Oh, that. I suppose we’ll have to kill all six of you then. I brought this along with me.” Prince Blueblood pulled out a device with a red button in the middle. “It can activate the signal back at our headquarters automatically.”

“You can’t be serious. After all that I did. Twilight, Rainbow, Pinkie, and Fluttershy are innocent.”

“I’m sorry it had to end this way. But you two are too much of an inconvenience.”

Rarity drew back from Applejack. They looked solemnly at each other.

“So this is it, then,” Applejack said. “Ah just want to know that even though you made a bad decision, that Ah still love you.” Tears dripped silently down her cheeks.

“And I love you.”

They kissed.

Prince Blueblood pressed the button.

Comments

[Westbrook87]

I haven't read the story yet, but shouldn't this be an AU?

[Westbrook87]

Meh. The premise seemed to come out of left field...from a distant planet. The plot was as impenetrable and as opaque as plate armor. The technical aspects of writing were fine, but I'm not an editor.

All in all, I feel like I've read a mildly interesting story that felt too rushed.

[yoshiXII]

2721664 Thanks for the feedback. I may re-edit this in the future.

[Westbrook87]

2726550

'Kay, I'll make sure to read it again then. Good luck.

[Starswirls Beard]

This story has some serious flaws but there were some things I really did enjoy about it. I like the concept that Rarity is being put in a compromising position and will do anything to save her friends. The fact that she's willing to risk everything by telling AJ seems very genuine, and it's something I could easily see. The grammar and spelling are well done also.

However, it's easy to get lost while reading this. This story has the pacing of a freight train. In one paragraph the villains explain themselves and there really seems to be no rhyme our reason for their actions. There's no explanation of why these two love each other, and they share one kiss before the plot skips again. There's no particular reason that Rarity was targeted in the first place either. The dialog is a bit stilted and the characters repeat themselves often in the same senten. Perhaps condensing this into a solid story instead of chapters would be a way to break up the feeling that this story is disconnected.

With some editing I think you have the tools to make something very good and original, I'd love to read it again after some reworking. Keep up the good work!

[Rarijack4lyfe]

Whyyyyyyyy?