Greetings and bienvenue, I am Michael Ravencroft. Writer and artist. From the obscure, to the known, from Comics, to Tokusatsu, nothing eludes my creative eyes. Hark the Raven.
Crossovers10,954 stories ·7,367 members
The Writers' Group56,467 stories ·9,300 members
HEROES 863 stories ·363 members
Completed Story Compendium21,069 stories ·1,703 members
The Shameless Self-Promotion Bureau49,306 stories ·5,462 members
Beings with Super Powers1,125 stories ·1,532 members
The Marvel/DC Co-Fan Club563 stories ·717 members
After being freed from their bonds, the Emotional Entities seek out a world where they can live in peace and harmony. What better place to live than Equestria, a land which embodies the very powers of will, hope, compassion, and love. But can the entities of the Emotional Spectrum fit in with the pony race? And can they truly escape the turmoil of the universe they left behind, or will a new War of Light be ignited?
Edit: New cover art, courtesy of myself.
Page generated in 0.206 seconds
Total duration
766 users online
727,227 hits today, 2,364,530 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
and I shit my pants.
Use a spell checker. "Prolouge" is not a word.
green lantern of Equestria and it's Ion. Winning? though earler it seemed rush no offense.
lol, Adara x Scootaloo? I like it. again feels a bit rushed at that ending but then again I think it fitted for the moment. Also Scootaloo and Adara sitting in a tree house. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
3122260 Thanks, corrected it! I was in a bit of a rush when I posted it.
3122298 If you are referring to "The Winningverse" this is unrelated to that. Ion is the Emotional Entity of Willpower.
Thanks for comments!
3122346 Yes it may seem like a bit of an odd shipping, but I'm happy with it.
man, I wish they could translate Indigo. oter than that nic job.
please tellme the other entities will show up. I somehow imagine greed hitting it off well with D.T. or maye that's fear? Anyways look forward to more stuff... please tell me no black lanterns wold be involved?
Please, please, please, PLEASE don't tell me RD was going to say marefriend. That has been done to death, brought back, killed again, then had it's corpse molested by hormonally imbalanced teenagers.
3122452 Other Entities will come in due time. As for the Black Lanterns....
......
3126384 you sick fuck... guess Spike would learn of real zombies eventually. Fucking GENIUS!
@Michael_Ravencroft...
1. Being a long-time (or "old", I grew up with just TWO [Color] Lantern Corps and zero Entities...) Green Lantern Corps fan, I really like your CrossOver premise.
.
Some literary advice & critiques...
2. Keep the story centered on your protagonist(s). The great thing is that the Entities are broadly defined, so this gives you a lot of creative room to work with. But as with any good story, it is important to maintain focus on your protagonists, especially when you have so many of them (7).
3. DON'T bring in the various [Color] Lantern Corps. You have the myriad of MLP:FiM cast to work with, interacting with seven titan-powered CrossOver characters. Bringing in the other [Color] Lantern Corps would fatally dilute your story because readers' focus would be spread too thin (and that kills reader interest quick). And personally speaking, Hal Jordan and the other human Lanterns in Equestria would just ruin everything.
If you "have" introduce ring-slingers into Equestria, then I would suggest using MLP:FiM cast members (more towards the supporting &/or background pony cast (meaning do not use The Mane Six). But I would advise avoiding that too, if possible.
.
4. Cosmic Beings can be flustered/stymied by Mortal Concerns. While this falls more under Slice of Life, there are plenty of entertaining scenes can be written at how the Entities try to blend in and integrate to mortal pony life and society, as well as trying to maintain a modicum of a "secret identity." The Entities may "feed" (loosely speaking) off of their emotional portfolio, but now that they have taken corporeal (mortal) form, what kind of joys and quirks will they experience when they try eating food? What will sleeping be like? Bathing and grooming? (or preening for pegasus) What will it be like if the Entities find out their pony forms have un-intended side-effects that even they could not have predicted? (unicorn magic, pegasus weather control, earth pony nature-bond, etc.)
5. The characters you have given Lives to, do not take it away from them. Notice I said "lives" not "life." You have given the entities corporeal forms (pony or other MLP:FiM race) and a sentient sense of self-awareness, so it would be counter-productive if they wind up possessing an MLP character (or otherwise) and being regressed into their previous passive symbiotic/parasitic roles.
6. Hamburger vs. Steak. While they are naturally drawn to strong sources ("steak") of their particular emotional portfolio, The Entities can feed off of ambient emotions in the greater whole ("hamburger") to both survive and to recharge their energies. So while they do draw strength and recover more quickly from individually strong emotional sources, they do not require it to survive or (eventually) replenish themselves.
7. Prologue means One Chapter. While I have enjoyed your individual introductions, your use of multiple Prologues is improper literary format. A Prologue chapter should be short and deliberately vague &/or ambiguous to pique the reader's interest. I would advise simply removing the "Prologue" tags and number-label the chapters you have. If you want an Prologue example, it is given below.
~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~
8. I think "Prose" would have been a more fitting nickname than ". 'Lyte." for Proselyte. Yes, I know the pronounciation of Proselyte is different, but "Prose" would be ironically fitting given the linguistic nature of the Indigo Tribe's secret-language.
9. An important aspect to remember: the Green Light of Will is the "center" &/or "lynchpin" of the Emotional Spectrum, as written in the comics, and even evidenced by your cover image. The other six Lights not only become stronger and more synergized in its presence, but they also evolve and develop as a result. This is the (comics) explanation to why the darker-themed [Color] Lantern Corps have been able to evolve towards more positive (if not "good") developments. This is the (comics) explanation to why Red Lanterns could become anti-heroes, Larfleeze could be brought out to fight in times of need, and that even the power of Fear (Yellow) could be harnessed for (somewhat) heroic deeds.
This is not always beneficial to the Green Light of Will &/or Ion, however.
In that specific regard, only the Blue Light of Hope returns the synergy by greatly empowering (and sometimes overly powering) Will. So it will be interesting to see how you play out the meeting(s) &/or team-ups between Ion and Adara.
.
10. I look forward to seeing Predator meeting Rarity; the way you have her (Predator) written, I think it will be a very interesting (&/or entertaining) scene....
[Rarity]: You know what this means, darling...?
[Predator]: (enthusiathic tone) Yes, but I love to hear you say it...!
[Together]: To the spa! *Aloe & Vera appear*
That, or possibly Predator and Trixie, since both seem to have a taste for showmanship (or just showing off).
.
11. Example Prologue (for above comments)...
.
12. I look forward to reading more of your CrossOver fan-fiction
.
Exhume is possibly not the word you are looking for friend. Exude maybe?
I love Green Lantern and the lore behind the emotional spectrum and it's entities. Adara as a filly seems fitting because who has more hope than a child?
I love it so far, cant wait to see the other entities.
Proselyte VS Angel Bunny, who would win that one I wonder?
Predator is one of the most unpredictable of the entities so this ought to be interesting...
3127132 First off I greatly appreciate your lengthy comment, must means I'm doing something right.
Anyway I like some of your ideas about Predator meeting other ponies like Rarity and Trixie are good, I was trying to think of some embarrassingly random antics for her to get into, and those two, among some other pre-planed things, will be included, thank you.
Yes I do know Prologues are a single Chapter, but I needed to introduce the four main character Entities into the lives of the specific MLP cast members. Also it would be one lengthy chapter.
Fourth, the Entities seem to wield their own power. While Hope does empower Will, Adara has shone and other Entities have shone that they have great power. When Adara possessed Michele Morrison she was able to wield its power without the need of any other Emotional Light.
Let me clarify something to all who are reading this. This is about the Entities, at least the four for now, and their interactions and relationships with the ponies they are drawn to.
THERE WILL BE NO APPEARANCES BY ANY OF THE OTHER CORPS. MEMBERS FROM THE GL UNIVERSE (a.k.a RING-SLINGERS).
Thank you all for your comments, and I promise updates will come soon.
3140990...
You are correct, Blue Lanterns' rings can only use minimal functions on their own (solo). This is usually is limited to:
- 1. flight/interstellar-travel (self only)
- 2. protective shield-aura & life support (also self only)
- 3. sensory scans
- 4. communication
Besides some other minor functions, this meant no constructs, no energy blasts, no healing, no prophetic visions, or other major powers/functions. Only in the presence of the Green Light of Will do Blue Lantern rings unlock their full functions, and emerge as the most powerful Lanterns of the seven [Color] Lantern Corps.
You are also correct that Adara (or her host) and her Guardians (formerly Ganthet and Sayd) can use the full range/functions of the Blue Light of Hope without needing to synergize with the Green Light of Will, but only at a "standard" power-level of a Lantern ring-wielder. This holds true, for the most part, for the other Entities and their respective Guardians. However, the synergizing effect of power-boosting between Green & Blue also still holds as well, as it is a passive effect.
It is also a good call to not involve any ring-slingers, particularly the human Lanterns. One of the things that put me, a long-time GLCorps fan, off with the GL series in recent times was how everything became overly centered around the human Lanterns, particularly Hal Jordan (many fans derided that the GL comics may as well be re-titled "The Hal Jordan Show"), and all the other non-human Lanterns served to be disposable casualties (the dreaded "red shirts" to Hal Jordan's Captain Kirk).
~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~
You are welcome to use/adapt any creative ideas &/or suggestions I freely provide
.
Of which, here are 10 ideas for you:
#1 - Ion &/or Proselyte meet the sea-ponies while in their natural forms; Ion in his cetacean (whale) form and Proselyte in his cephalopod (octopus) form. Comedic interaction ensues (and possibly a musical number...
), as well as adventurous actions under the seas as the water-themed Entities prove their worth to them. The end-result is that valuable allies (if not friends) are gained for use much later in the story.
#2 - Adara seeks out Ion; either for counsel, guidance, &/or assistance. Unfortunately, the synergizing effect between the Blue and Green Lights being in close-proximity to each other causes problems for both Entities trying to maintain a low profile; their synergy-boosted energies cannot be properly contained by their mortal pony forms, bleeding out across Ponyville. This causes various effects such as ponies having prophetic visions or moments of enlightened insight (blue), or perhaps kickstarting the wing-development of a certain struggling-to-fly pegasus filly (blue+green), or even a certain mint-green unicorn to form dextrous-fingered constructs (green) much to her meme'd delight, or other various dramatic &/or comedic effects...
#3 - The Predator is approached by an unlikely, but surprisingly earnest (as the twist), supplicant in becoming a member of the Star Sapphire Corps...Queen Chrysalis.
Or the reverse, Queen Chrysalis and the Changelings attempt to feed upon The Predator and her Violet Light, only to find they have bitten off far more than they can chew. Chrysalis thought she had found a potentially endless fountain for her hive to drink from, only to find to her horror that she has instead put the collective Changelings' face directly in front of a fire hose locked open on full-blast. The story-twist result is that Princess Cadence & Shining Armor find themselves racing to save a knees-begging desperate Chrysalis and the Changelings from the darker side of The Predator.
Or the inverse, The Predator discovers the Changelings, and finds a species in dire need of her Violet Light more than any other race she has encountered. Sharing her Violet Light with the Changelings gains The Predator adulation, gratitude, and an army (for use much later in the story).
.
#4 - Ion is unable to avoid or restrain himself from acting as a Green Lantern would in protectorship and heroism for those in need. This compounds the burdens of his "mundane" Equestrian life by having an additional secret identity to maintain (cosmic entity, "normal" earth pony, super hero), but also gives him a strong sense of humility in the value of having a "normal" mortal life.
#5 - The Ophidian attempts to exert control over (but not possess) Spike...and fails miserably (perhaps even comedically). Spike has girded himself emotionally and mentally against the influence of Greed since the events of Secret of My Excess. Other dragons, however...
#6 - The Butcher attempts to gain dominion over the dragons, seeing their raw destructive potential and symmetry in their breathing flame (or other breath weapons, if you go the D&D dragon-breath route). Unfortunately for The Butcher, this brings him into conflict with The Ophidian who has parallel (but obviously different) goals, but through Avarice. The clash between the two "factions" give cause for the benevolent Entities to become involved in a microcosm version of The War of Light.
#7 - Parallax finds a femme-fatale ally, a mutual attraction, and a deadly rival, in Nightmare Moon (who is an parasitic entity much like Parallax, according to the MLP:FiM comics).
#8 - Princess Luna (or perhaps even Princess Celestia) become smitten with Ion after seeing him in heroic action, compounded that they also see him as worthy paramour who understands immortal longevity.
#9 - The Entities each experiment with wielding the magicial nature of their chosen pony races, with various results, effects, mishaps, &/or consequences. This is compounded and complicated by the fact that the Entities and their Light are vulnerable to magic (according to DC canon).
.
#10 - As was mentioned before, the other Lights synergize and evolve when in the presence of the Green Light of Will, even if their Light is detrimental to the Green Light. Yellow Fear, Red Rage, Orange Avarice, these Lights may weaken, burn away, &/or drain the power of Green Will, but they still wind up evolving simply by being in Green Will's presence for extended periods.
However, the reverse holds true too.
It was hinted at, and briefly confirmed by Geoff Johns (not going to dig through the internet for the link/article/tweet) that Ion and the Green Light of Will had evolved as well from The (First) War of Light and The Blackest Night; in that Ion could now draw upon a second source of emotion to empower his Light, giving him a powerful Ace-in-the-Hole and kept him ahead of the other Entities/Lights. This emotion was still "Green" since it still functioned in overcoming Fear, Rage, Greed, and other negative emotions...
Ion could now draw upon Courage, in addition to Willpower.
Sadly, this storyline angle was cut off before it could take shape due to the DCnU reboot
.
@Michael_Ravencroft...
1. Never a need to apologize for Real Life busy-ness delaying you (though mentioning it for explanation generally helps
). Indulging in your brony-dom takes third (3rd) place before work and school. For me, it is more like fifth (5th) through seventh (7th), after full-time work, full-time parent, other family tendings-to, active MMO guild-master, etc. etc.
2. A minor correction, amid some other minor technical errors...
error:
correction:
There are some other minor technical errors as well, but this one was nagging at me for the rest of the read-through for this chapter (5). I would advise going back over your work for detailed clean-up at some point (not "now" but an definitive "later").
.
3. Not bad for a build-up chapter (5). Felt a bit choppy with the time-frame divisions, but otherwise it got the plot across.
4. I am not certain if, by DC canon, the synergizing boost-effect between the Blue and Green Lights being within close proximity to each other can be suppressed, but that is a minor passable detail. However, it should remain a consistent and regular story-factor for both Adara and Ion to keep in mind when together and trying to maintain their secret identities (or keep a low profile).
5. A creative suggestion, not only for the current story-arc but also to set things up down the road of your fan-fiction...
At the action-climax of this particular story-arc, Adara and Princess Luna confront the nightmares which have broken through Luna's dream-gate in Scootaloo's mind-/dream-scape. Unfortunately, the collective strength and numbers of the gathered nightmares prove almost too much for even the duo ( [badly injured Luna]: "Adara...just go...").
However, the tide turns in favor of the heroes when Ion enters the fray. Perhaps Ion was concerned about his "little sister" and come to check upon her progress, OR perhaps because Adara shows her own wisdom and foresight by asking Ion be her back-up before the confronation upon the dream-plane [Personally, I like the latter]. With the synergy boost between Hope and Willpower, and even an additional boost of Courage from Scootaloo herself (perhaps spurred from words from Ion, Adara, &/or Luna, to overcome her fears & despair), the protagonists are able to vanquish the collective nightmares before another Nightmare Moon (Nightmare Scoots?) is created.
In the direct aftermath, Adara feels a closer, more personal, bond with her "big brother," something beyond the synergy of their Lights. In other words, an excuse to write out an unabashed "D'Awww!" moment between the two Entities, to show that they are learning to form their own personal mortal bonds, even with each other.
In the (long-term) foreshadowing, Ion secretly begins the self-evolution process of tapping into a second source of "green" emotion (Courage) able to be used to replenish himself and empower/strengthen his Light. This self-evolution not only increases Ion's power and versatility, but shows his own personal character evolution. It shows that even as a cosmic-tier Entity, Ion is not just...*shades*...a one-trick-pony... (yeeeaaahhh!!!)
Finally, in the (mid-term progression) romantic drama, Princess Luna may be smitten with Ion after seeing him standing strong and beacon-bright (like one might say...a Lantern...) amid the engulfing darkness surrounding the heroes ( [Luna]: "Would that I had such a strong and stalwart stallion in my life before I succumbed to the Nightmare...
").
.
6. I look forward to the next chapter.
Dang it Cliffhanger!
I love this relationship your building between Adara and Scootaloo, there's just so much adorableness
totally epic, can't wait for more
Curse you and your cliffhangers!
Don't leave us hanging like this! The drama is almost too much, what's going to happen next?
3517005 Currently working on part two, if I had kept going then this chapter would've been longer than I wanted it to.
But so sorry for the cliffhangers
3518180 Curse you trollestia!!
Slight nitpick as the Blue Lantern oath is slightly wrong. It should begin:
''In fearful day in raging night'' you currently have it the other way around.
Otherwise I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter.
3555534 Fixed
I can't believe I did that! Me, the guy who's memorized EVERY lantern oath!
3560006 Don't worry it happens to the best of us.
nice and very well done. I look forward to more
Applejack and Ion = adorable
Predator should be interesting, but I wonder if The Butcher or Ophian will show up later on? Perhaps even The White Entity or even Black Hand (he is the black entity after all).
Nice. Just saw the update and loved the chapter. Please come out with the next one soon. You've taken a bold idea and have developed it into an interesting story. I can't wait for more. Cheers
Ions costume was a nod to Alan Scott wasn't it
3884476 Thank you, glad you liked Predator's chapter
3885882 Actually I didn't notice until you said something. To be perfectly honest I was just making that armor up, damn, did I my subconscious channel Alan Scott, the first Green Lantern, without my knowing!?
sweet chapter. Very dramatic
The drama and the feels!! I think I cried a little.
Holy s**t, Snowdrop?!?
AWSOME
Also that ending made it sound like we Havn't seen the last of her.
Also I LEGETLY had a dream of Snowdrop meeting the Enitys. though nyx was there too.
Fate, you are a mysterious bugger.
Are the other entities of emotions going to be in the story?
3950592
I will say that Snowdrop might, might return. How soon, I cannot say. But stay tuned to find out the answer!
3999178
Yes, the other three (Rage, Avarice, and Fear) will make an appearance. I can't say when or how less I give away the surprises to come, but don't worry, we'll see good'ol Butcher, Ophidian, and Parallax soon enough.
I loved this chapter, especially this bit:
It epitomises why I love the Blue Lanterns.
Great Chapter. I want to hear more about the Pony who made Scootaloo it's "Little Bird" and who gave her that disease. I also look forward to seeing the negative entities as well I bet they are really interesting characters. I also feel that there is more to Scootaloo than this. I feel her problems aren't over yet and that her nightmare pony and the story of her past are going to become focal points later in the story. Am I correct on any of that?
and the crying starts...
The rage guy is the one who did that to Scoots right
4002255...
1. Overall a good chapter (7). The word count alone earns you high marks. It was also the correct (literary) call to not split this into multiple chapters.
2. My only gripe for this chapter would be that, among all the previous chapters, this chapter (7) really could have really benefitted (storytelling-wise) from having multiple Entities in it. At the very minimum (with maximum storytelling effect), I think Ion should have had a presence in this story-arc chapter, not only providing his Green Light to synergize with Adara's Blue Light in curing Scootaloo and regenerating the damage, but also offering his own moral & emotional support to both fillies.
To paraphrase Atrocitus, Hope is powerless without the Will to act, even from its Entity.
To paraphase Saint Walker & Guardian Ganthet, Hope prays that all will be well, but it is the resolve of Willpower to see it come to pass.
Hope keeps the light of Life from flickering out into the Blackness, but it is the strength of Will that endures through pain and adversity to shine bright.
.
3. I look forward to seeing how you portray the negative-emotion Entities. I do hope (& advise) that you show them just as vulnerable (literarily speaking) to the different rules that govern the MLP-verse (particularly the high amount of magic in Equestria), as well as trials & tribulations for having taken on mortal form(s).
~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~
4005069...
4. It is highly unlikely that The Butcher inflicted the degenerative disease upon Scootaloo. Princess Twilight said that it was magical in nature, which the Entities are not (they are cosmic, not magical); if anything it is the opposite, the Entities and their Lights are vulnerable to magic (by DC comics' canon). Likewise, the magical disease was in place long before the very recent arrival of the Entities.
4002973
Glad I was able to bring that forth.
4004890
So yes, you are correct in some of it. Damn mind reader 
Yes there is more to her. Yes we will see who did this to Scootaloo, but I'm not telling when.
4005069
Scootaloo stories always make me have the feels, she's just too cute
4006415
. Derpy and Dinky are the exception of course, that was a life or death situation.
I do agree with your analysis of using Hope & Willpower to combat her disease. To be honest I struggled with the idea, I was caught in wanting this to be Adara's and Scootaloo's moment, it was already a big enough reveal to Scoot's about her powers and I didn't want to reveal more than one Entities power to too many characters, too many ponies secrets to keep track of who knows what
Also, in reference to Equestria's magical attributes. I have not neglected this, their magical energies will play a big role in this universe...how big a role is something between me and the Entities
4006415
The only real reason I think that The Butcher is the one that put the virus on Scoots is what better way to breed rage and hate. In a world as peaceful as this what better way to breed a rage so deep as to remove a child's greatest and only dream (you could say getting a cutie mark but what is that without her being able to fly). We have seen another of the Entities as a unicorn so maybe it was a bit of both magic and regular Entity power. But as I know next to nothing of the Entities or the lanterns you are probability right.
4006572 Not mind reader just very experienced reader who pays way too much attention to detail. I blame the excessive number of comic books I've read over the years. Especially the marvel comics which are darker and more complex than the DC story lines which forces you to think ahead of the story because they love their plot twists. Anyway good story so far, I've reread it a couple of times and enjoyed more and more each time. Keep up the good work
4006796 I have to disagree on that. I believe it's an outside force other than one of the entities simply because the way the story has been written the entities have been in Equestria for a short time and it's been hinted at Scootaloo was infected when she was a lot younger probably by the nightmare creature. If it was an entity behind the infection I would lean towards the Greed entity. The nightmare uses the phrase "My little bird" indicating it wants to own her, making her flightless would guarantee that she couldn't escape. Besides the rage entity and the red light embodies a particular type of rage. One becomes a Red Lantern only when they experience great rage over the death of a loved one. The way I interpret it is the red light is magnified by rage but righteous rage directed towards bringing evil to justice or at least getting vengeance.
4006923
As I am unfamiliar with the Entities I believe I have to agree with you. You make a very logical point.
4006923
Ah, a none evil Red Lantern! Then here's an oath for you!
The power of the crimson red,
Can lead you soul away from dread.
And heal the deepest wounds of hate,
Let no one else decide your fate!
4006972 I understand and have internalized the oath but their leader Atrocitus starts out by wanting to destroy the Guardians not because he thinks they are evil but he wants revenge on them for destroying his sector via the Manhunters then covering it up. Most red Lanterns are recruited based on a specific kind of rage and that's over the rage over a lost loved one not just hatred or rage for no purpose. They are evil in a sense wanting revenge for past wrongs but they as a Corps are slowly focusing their rage on bringing justice or more appropriate vengeance towards those who have committed crimes. They have a long way to go but are not pure evil. I'm just making a point.
4007597
My bad for lack of context.
Yeah I know, I just remembered this oath from the GL Animated series, thought it be cool.