Reign of the shy-pony

by The_Swedish_Horror

Blistered hooves

Buttercup was a yellow earth pony with a butter churn as her cutie mark. She was on her way to Baltimare to sell her own, home-produced butter to the townspoines in the big city. Her butter was the finest butter in the north east of Equestria, she believed, and many ponies would testify that she was right in her assumption. For Buttercup's butter was truly a very good and nutritious complement to the food, made from only the finest cow milk.
Now she trotted along the road, happily singing for herself. Her saddle bags were filled with packages of butter and ice packs to keep the butter from melting.
"Butter, butter. I like butter... la la la..." she sang, cheerful as only a very, very cheerful pony could be.

Suddenly she saw a sight that almost made the heart jump in her chest. It was light yellow pegasus, slowly limping towards her. The poor creature looked like it had been in some sort of horrifying accident; its wings had lost many of their feathers, its mane and tail were torn and frayed and it had a blackened eye. Slowly the creature focused on her with an unsteady, cyan-coloured gaze. It opened its mouth and spoke:
"Um..."
Buttercup, who had became nearly paralyzed by the chock of seeing a pony such a state, slowly came back to her senses.
"Oh! You poor thing... What in the name of Celestia happened to you? Should I get an ambulance?" she asked as she hurried to help the pony.
"Yes, please... And do you have a Band-Aid?"
"No... but I do have some ice packs in my saddle bags. Here, take this... Wait here while I run and get the ambulance! Soon we'll get you to the hospital..."
"Thanks, but... But the ambulance is not for me. There are two other ponies further down the road that are in much, much worse shape. They need it more. I'll just take the ice pack for my eye, and then I'll be going... Baltimare is in that direction? Right?"
"Wait, what? There are others too? Where you in a traffic accident?" Buttercup asked.
"Um... no, it was not really... an accident."

* * *

Meanwhile, but in Ponyville, a certain princess was hiding behind a tree... Celestia had managed to slip away from Granny Smith's ever watching eye for the moment and she intended to stay hidden for the remainder of the day. She didn't like apple bucking at all. In fact, she hated it with an intense fury.
"That old foal! How dare she order me around to buck apples? I am the princess of the sun! My subjects should fear me! Fear me! Fear... me!" she said, her voice fading to a frustrated whimper as she uttered the last few words.

Her legs ached from all the bucking and she had blisters underneath her rear hooves. It hurt really bad and on top of that she had stepped in some manure... Celestia was boiling with rage. How could her subjects so completely have lost all respect for her, the mightiest being ever known to ponykind? How had she become such a joke that even an old, wrinkled earth pony like Granny Smith dared to treat her like she was some kind of maid?! A couple of months ago, this would have been utterly unthinkable. But since then her reputation had taken a severe blow. And reputation, not brute force, was the only reliable foundation of power... Nightmare Moon and Fluttershy had never realized that. And as a result their reigns had been chaotic, brutal and short. Now she was temped to follow the same path, despite knowing how such an adventure would most likely end...

"Perhaps I'll smite the old goat..." Celestia said for herself, stroking her chin with a dirty hoof. "Perhaps I'll use just a little magic to gently send her to a much happier place..."
But deep down she realized that she would never do such a thing. Although she liked to fantasise about it for the moment she knew that she could never hurt another living being again... Those days were over and she was very thankful for that.

"Are you all right... your... uh... princess-ness?" a voice suddenly asked from behind.
Celestia turned around, quite shocked that somepony had managed to sneak up on her twice this day. They'd better not make a habit of this, she thought...
It was Big MacIntosh. The red stallion looked at her with his calm, friendly eyes.
"Yes, I am fine," she said.
"May I help?" said Big Mac and took a glance at her hooves. "I saw you had some trouble walking..."
Without waiting for a reply he opened up his saddlebag and took out a roll of duct tape. He then clumsily pulled off her gilded hoofshoes and examined the princess's hooves by poking at them. She wasn't particularly delighted by this tactless and fumbling display of medical care. They were indeed blistered and swollen and poking them with his heavy hooves wasn't exactly the first thing an experienced doctor would do.

"This'll help for a while..." he said and put small pieces of tape over the chafes. "You've done great work today, princess."
Celestia knew he was lying but she didn't feel any need to correct him. After all, it was his sister who was the element of honesty and not him. After all these disasters Celestia really needed all the praise she could get.
"You are a kind and gentle stallion," she said.
"Eeeyup..."
Big Macintosh blushed under his red fur and looked away. He wasn't that used to receive compliments and when he received them from princess Celestia herself he barely knew what to do or how to act.
"Would you accept my reward?"
"Eh... Eyup?" Big Mac said, not sure what to expect from her.
"Good. As a reward I shall give you your own bank. How is that for a reward? Not too bad, if I may say so myself."
"Eyu... Nope...?" Big Mac replied in utter shock.
"Excellent. I will call it The Honest Apple Family Bank. You'll be its manager and you will of course receive a good salary."
"A-a celery?"
"If you whish, my dear MacIntosh..."

* * *

"Let me go!" Rainbow Dash cried as she struggled with the ropes that tied her to the warden's chair.
The bearded unicorn had easily restrained her with a magical spell and now he and the old goat were contemplating her upcoming fate.
"What shall we do with you, my cute little friend..." the unicorn said and stroked his beard.
"With me?" the old warden-goat asked, utterly perplexed.
"No, not you, you imbecile creature! The spy-pony, of course! Go and keep watch in the hallway... What I'm about to do might be slightly illegal and highly unethical."
"Y-you aren't going to hurt her, are you?"
"That's none of your concern, warden."

"Let me go now, or I will get very angry. And you won't like me when I'm angry," said Rainbow with a glare towards the unicorn.
"No, I can't do that... How much did you hear of our little conversation? And have you read these classified files? Yes, of course you have read them... Snooping as usual, I see... Well, perhaps we should take you to the admiral? But on the other hoof, that would make a long and boring trip and I'm not sure if that'll be worth the effort. No, I'll just use my memory spell to wipe your mind clean and then I'll release you back into the wild."
"Just let me go! And I want to see that Fluttershy is okay. If you have hurt her in any way, I swear to Celestia..."
"Celestia? Celestia can't help you. She is incompetent and weak. She has no money anymore, no castle, no power... She is practically a worthless shadow of her former glory. All that time we have feared this... this feeble clown! Isn't it funny? Bah! Now everypony can see how weak she really is."
"NO! She is not like that!"
"Are you denying that she has lost most of her power? Are you denying that she most likely has severe deficiencies in her budget? I am a trained psychologist, you know, and I can recognize denial when I see it," the unicorn said and started to play with his cigar, slowly shaking it up and down as he spoke.
"You're insane!" Rainbow Dash said.
"No. Now you're just projecting your inner anxiety on me... I am not insane. And besides, you do not possess the sufficient education to produce a valid diagnosis of my mental state. You clearly have a troubled mind... Perhaps I'll do you a favour when I remove your memories?"
"Well, perhaps I do you a favour when I... I remove... some... stuff and... eh... things from... from your... house?"
There was an awkward silence.

"What? What in the name of Equestria could you possibly mean by that?" the psychologist said, truly baffled.
"I was just thinking of an awesome comeback to say before I break loose and kick your flank!"
"Oh. You kind of failed at that."

* * *

Agent Sulky slowly got up on her hooves, helped by two ambulanceponies. She immediately felt a stinging pain in her leg. The carriage she had been riding was lying upside down in a ditch and her fancy trench coat looked like it had actually been in the trenches... She wasn't sure what had happened exactly, but somehow that pale pony had gone berserk. She had fought like a rabid wolverine and bited like a serpent.
With a trembling hoof Sulky reached for the sunglasses in her pocket. They were broken in half.
"Bucking hay..." the disorientated pony mumbled.
"Are you in pain?" one of the ambulanceponies asked with a worried look on her face. "You have a sprained ankle and a few scratches... We'll take you to the hospital right away! Your friend is being taken there right now as we speak. He is not that much injured, only a little bruised and a deep bite wound on his tail."
"And what about the pegasus?" Sulky asked.
"What pegasus?"
"The butter-colored pegasus with a pink mane and butterflies as a cutie mark?"
"I don't know... However that description does sound highly familiar... It reminds me of somepony I read about in a magazine not long ago."
"Yes, it does, doesn't it?"

Agent Sulky cursed silently when she was being loaded into the back of the ambulance carriage. Being taken to the hospital for a sprained ankle! What a waste of her valuable time... Sulky was about to protest, but before she could open her mouth an ambulancepony had already shut the door behind her.
"That's just great... Now we have a just-out-of-prison Fluttershy roaming free without any supervision..."

* * *

Meanwhile Twilight Sparkle was reading a book. She was blissfully unaware of the recent events that had transpired. She didn't know that Fluttershy was on the run from a strange and shadowy conspiracy, that Rainbow Dash was being held captive by a slightly disturbing psychologist and that princess Celestia was planning to scam her own subjects out of their money. She had other concerns for the time being.

"What a fascinating book about pegasus behaviour," she said to herself as she eyed through the pages containing information about the hidden language of pegasi wings. "When the Pegasus is excited, its wings become spread out..."
"Ya seem an awful lot interested in that particular subject," Applejack said from across the room. "Ah'm startin' to think that you're up to some mischief?"
"No, Applejack... I'm just very curious."
"Are you sure, Sugarcube?"
"Yes. There is absolutely nothing of the sort going on... Mischief, that is. I'm just very interested in extending my knowledge in many areas, and this is just a coincidence that you somehow managed to hear me mention it two or three times. So there is most definitely no mischief going on in any way. It's very strange that you would even think that I would have some mischief in mind. Being interested in pegasi behaviour is perfectly normal and not at all suspicious in any way," Twilight explained, her face slowly turning red.
"Well, if you say so, then Ah guess that there is no mischief..."
"Of course not. And why would it be? Haha, how ridiculous... It's not like I'm obsessed with it in any way and my interest in that matter is purely academic."
"Ah see... Speaking of pegasi, where is Rainbow Dash? Ah thought she'd be back by now?"
"I don't know... She went to see Fluttershy in prison. But that was several hours ago... I wonder what they're up to?" Twilight said, desperate to change the subject as fast as possible. When Applejack looked away she hid a small notebook under a pillow. On its cover she had written: Butterfly and Iridescent -A romantic love story.

* * *

The sun was setting behind the silhouette of the apple trees of the Sweet apple acres. A long day's work had finally come to an end and it was now suppertime at the farm. Granny Smith looked at the baskets filled with freshly bucked apples just outside the orchard's fence. She had to admit for herself that the results weren't that impressive, but the old pony decided do not bring that subject up at the table. She assumed that they each and everyone had done their very best and that it would be impolite to be anything but happy with what help she could get. Every little bit counted, especially now when Applejack was away in Baltimare, doing whatever it was that she was doing.

"Come on, everypony! It's suppertime!" she cried.
Had she carried a watch she would have noticed that the sun went down unusually early this day.
"Come and eat! The supper is ready!"
Applebloom and Big Mac soon showed up, followed by two tired princesses. Luna looked like she had been to Tartarus and back; her mane was a blue, ruffled mess with twigs and leaves sticking out of it and her legs were covered in ant bites. She didn't look particularly happy, but compared to Celestia she seemed like a ray of sunshine. The elder sister was limping and her coat was dusty. Her flowing mane was not so flowing anymore and she had small, soggy bits of crushed apple all over it. She was not pleased with the situation at all.
"Thank you for helping out with the apples," Granny Smith said. "That was much appreciated. And a hard day's work is good for the appetite, too. I have made some of my finest apple pie!"
"How kind of you..." Celestia murmured.

Soon they were all seated at the kitchen table and enjoying the delicious pie that Granny had prepared for them.
"This baked dish is highly flavorous! We find this very delightful," said Luna as she levitated a big piece of pie in the air in front of her.
"Thank you! You're so sweet."
"Will you be helping us tomorrow too?" Apple Bloom asked, looking at the princesses across the table.
There was a sudden silence. Celestia immediately stuffed a big piece of pie into her mouth and Luna started to fidget with her chair.
"Well, dear Apple Bloom, I... I think that depends on... on a variety of factors... eh... that have great significance for... several..."
"Mff... Luna is of course more than happy to help," Celestia said between the bites. "I will gladly let you borrow her for the whole day if you want..."
"Sister!"
"No, I'm fully convinced that you can handle this alone. I need to be in my room, taking care of important tasks to ensure the wellbeing of my subjects. They are always my number one concern..."
"Tis absurd! I have subjects too!" protested Luna.
"No, Luna. You only have a handful of ponies with bat wings and they will most likely be asleep during the day while I have to manage the whole of Equestria."
Luna looked at her sister with an angry frown.
"And pray tell, dear sister, how has thy management played out lately?"
"Luna! That's enough!"
"Oh, hush! Both of you! This was meant to be a nice little supper, but you two are just impossible! Eat your pie and keep quiet until you have something nice to say to each others!"

And so they ate the rest of the supper in silence.

Comments

[Seether00]

Luna and Celestia are silly ponies.

[The_Swedish_Horror]

3515443

Hehe, definitely not their finest moment...

[NocturneD85]

put Fluttershy back in charge, Celestia already showed her real colors

[The_Swedish_Horror]

3515908

I won't tell you what will happen, but there is some signs that Celestia might have some trouble holding on to her throne. Whether Fluttershy will make another attempt to gain power, or not, is for the time being a well kept secret....

[HJSDGCE]

I need someone to draw Celestia and Luna doing farmwork.
Puh-leeeeaaase!

[WhirringGears]

AoStH reference? SnooPINGAS usual I see...?

[The_Swedish_Horror]

3535004

Yes, it is!

I couldn't help myself throwing in a PINGAS-joke, just to see if anyone would notice

[The Lunar Rebel]

3536884 I noticed

[Commander19]

Celestia seems to become increasingly... Well... Just difficult, secretive, rude and insulting! (Wow, flutts screwed up)