I <3 Rainbow Dash fics I <3 Twilight fics I <3 TwiDash fics
Authors Note: I've changed the name of My OC to Noble Charge.
Noble Charge has horrible Nightmares every night, It all began when his friend Twilight left for the school of gifted unicorns. Slowly he is losing his connection to reality, when that happens he will die. Celestia knows this and decides to send him to PonyVille, claiming that it is 'for his health'. TwilightXOC, but with a Huge Twist of OCXRD
Page generated in 0.096 seconds
Total duration
649 users online
852,886 hits today, 1,996,409 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
So far, this is a fascinating tale.
The relationship between Twilight and Noble is very believable. I can really seeing a friendship like this happening in the official canon.
The dialogue is pleasant as well as emotional.
There isn't much left for me to say, as this is only Chapter 1. So, I'm looking forward to the rest soon.
I'd normally give a rating, but I'll save it for after more of the story is complete.
205417 Im honestly not sure how Rainbow Dash will feel in later chapters. I think right now it's the fact the Noble is the only Pegasus author. As it tends to be a unicorn profession
I was listening to the song Animal by Neon trees while writing "Hi again" so if your like me and like listening to music while reading, give that a play
Who knows it may make the story a little better
The sorrow and humor really kick in on this chapter.
I like how persistent Twilight is to Noble in getting to his dreams. Noble's reaction to the "invasion" is nicely done. Very believable.
Now I see it strange when alcoholic beverages are seen in My Little Pony. But, adding the "rainbow" ingredient makes it sound more sensible.
The writing for Rainbow Dash and Noble's drunken behavior is really funny. Though I should ask, why was Rainbow Dash drinking there anyway? No need to answer that if it will be told later on in the story.
So far, this story is still going well. Keep going.
213970 thank you, Rainbow Dash's drinking will probably explained later, probably.
215043 The drinking.
Don't worry, the beginning is fast, but it gets far more into detail with what happens.
Whenever I hear foul language in My Little Pony, I just ask myself, "do these words even exist in this world?".
Anyway, back to the chapter. It's funny how realistic you make the drunken behavior look. And, normally I would see the whole revenge thing as strange, but actually I can somewhat relate to that (I won't go into details).
I also couldn't help but crack at Noble's effort for "male bonding". It's just so sporadic.
The emotions of the characters are done okay. Especially at "Confusion-understanding-anger-RAGE!!!"
So far, this chapter is no doubt the goofiest. Is that good? Well, I can safely say I enjoyed it's silliness.
Keep on writing.
Keep on writing this fanfic, I'm interested- tracking!
I realize I haven't explained Noble a lot Imagine the Steven Merchant of Ponies
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxrlqyjja01qjzzyw.gif
.......The Inner Twilight fan wants me to rip your throut out and use it as Bird feed.
222345 I know, I kinda want to too. But don't worry you'll be getting a Twilight episode for the season finale
This was a weird chapter. And that's saying a lot, as this whole story is strange.
The talk between Twilight and Noble is still good, but I think the kiss was a bit too, random? I know she wanted to make things better, but I'm just nitpicking (again).
The obstacle course part, I think was pretty pointless. It does help see Noble's more athletic side, but for the most part, it doesn't serve much. I liked the scene with the Cutie Mark Crusaders, that was just charming and cute.
I can easily visualize Rarity being pulled back to her house. Just hilarious. Rainbow Dash is still doing great so far. All of the characters are well in character in this chapter.
Nice work so far.
222405....Elaberate or i will be forced to do somthing drastic.
222537 well you see the season finale; known throuout TV history as th best episodes, is going to be a Twilight episode. In fact you could say that it's going to be two times the Twilight.
222754........My mind is full of fu- oh wait are you talking about the Story or the Show?
222791 He's right, the show. I'm not making a fic where there are two Twilights, I would go to a place where lewd things would happen
222458 I've kinda dropped the ball, but I'll be getting back to how the story should be. I'll be focusing on more details of characters and get back on the right track
The emotions have really jumped up high with this chapter.
Noble's dark memories are very serious indeed. I would question what's with his father, but, that will probably be explained later.
I really don't have much to say here. I just really found it to have a very strong impact on the story.
Keep it up.
Well I'm glad you're aware of this chapter being pretty short.
But because it was so brief, I only have little to say.
Again, I do like some of the emotional moments. The sympathy is great too.
Not much else to say, but, good job so far.