Twilight is assassinated. Repeatedly. If only anypony knew what the word "immortal" meant...

Now with a reading by Skijarama!
Now available in Spanish!

Originally written for the Writeoff Association's February contest, "The Twilight Zone."
Thanks to Not_A_Hat, Masked Ferret, Floydien, Chryssi, and ChappedPenguinLips for prereading.

Twilight expects a lot from Discord, now that he has been 'reformed'. While he hasn't destroyed all of Equestria by making it a chaos filled wonderland, he does tend to annoy and lie to her and her friends about almost everything. As such, she has learned to take anything he says with a grain of salt. But imagine her surprise when the prideful Discord not only comes to her, claiming he wants to help other ponies but he begs for the her help to do so.

What was he planning?

This story is a sequel to Changeling Courtship Rituals

Queen Chrysalis attacked Canterlot, brainwashed Twilight Sparkle's brother, kidnapped her former foalsitter, defeated her mentor in combat, and conquered her kingdom. She kidnapped the sisters of Twilight's friends, turned them against one another, and tried to drain all of Twilight's magic. Queen Chrysalis has, at every opportunity, done her very best to utterly destroy Twilight Sparkle's life.

For some reason, this has not caused the pony to fall in love with her.

However, due to Twilight's misunderstanding of changeling customs, it does mean they are now married. Twilight eventually managed to tell the Queen the truth, but she forgot that whether it's a kingdom or a heart, changelings conquer.

And since the changeling way of conquest didn't work, Chrysalis is determined to try the pony way. The only problem is, of course, she has no idea what that is. But she knows someone who does: Princess Cadance.

Now, with the absolutely sincere help of her mortal enemy, the pony she once locked in the caves beneath Canterlot while trying to steal her husband on their very wedding day, Queen Chrysalis is going to woo the sister-in-law of that very pony.

Surely this is the most perfect plan ever devised.

***

Proofread by ShutterflyYay.

Takes place roughly after season five (so Starlight Glimmer is running around occasionally)

Queen Chrysalis likes it when I boop her on the nose. It helps her relax. However, one day, Princess Twilight Sparkle bursts in, thinking that Queen Chrysalis has put a spell on me.

Surely, when I explain to her that I boop her, she'll understand. Right?

Right?

Inspired by a delightful flash game that can be found here.

Featured on August 28th, 2016. This is as unexpected as it is amazing.

Once a Princess, now a Lord, Ember sends a letter to Princess Twilight to a situation that involves Spike. The letter seems serious and the dragons are already on their way. What could it entail about Ember's journey to Equestria? What does it mean for Spike?

Update: A NSFW version... has appeared! Those whom wish to explore the... freaky side, follow the link! Dragon Tails
Featured 4/17/2016!

The Follow up sequel called The Dragon Lord's Legacy can be found here! here

Spike's got three whole days to himself while Twilight is away at the Crystal Empire. Three whole days to be independent and free to do whatever he wants.

Or he would have, if a female dragon hadn't mistaken him for an abandoned hatchling. Now he's been snatched up and taken to her home to be "properly cared for."

Stuck in a cave with an overly-protective dragon intent on mothering him...maybe he should have just gone with Twilight.

Thanks to QueenCold for letting me use this picture of theirs as cover art!

This story is a sequel to Shocking but True Tales from the Brass Pony Pub

While Fluttershy is away for a holiday celebration, Discord spends Hearth's Warming Eve alone with Queen Chrysalis. However, the Queen has some problems on her mind.

This story is a sequel to A Queen's Lament

Just how much can love destroy before it heals? Ask Princess Cadance, Queen Chrysalis and Shining Armor as love, lust, desire and betrayal blur the lines in this sweeping finale of the Crystal Heart Saga

For years, Twilight Sparkle and Queen Chrysalis have been at each other's throats. Both have experienced victory over the other, and both have experienced defeat. Out of all the creatures in Equestria, none despise each other the way the pony Princess and changeling Queen do. They seemed destined to remain locked in battle forever, or at least until one is finally dead at the hooves of the other. The cruel insults, the vicious loathing, and the powerful spells that have passed back and forth between them at each meeting have become the stuff of legend.

Imagine Twilight's surprise when she finds out changelings consider this dating.

And now they're married.

***

Sequel: Pony Courtship Rituals

***

Some beautiful fanart of the end of chapter three was done by Dmann892; you can see it here.

More awesome fanart, this time from chapter one.

Now with a TvTropes page (obligatory TvTropes warning goes here).

If you want a Russian translation, you can find it here.

There is now a reading of the story on Youtube, which starts here.

Friendship is magic, but it doesn't always win the day.

Twilight Sparkle knows this...

Queen Chrysalis knows this as well.

Edits by Scarheart, MaddiePink5, Kildeez

FEATURED IN EQD!!! http://www.equestriadaily.com/2016/04/story-friendship-lost.html?m=1
WE GOT A GOOD AUDIO READING! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av4qrFmvkFs&t=87s