Star Power isn't Twilight Sparkle -- but she does play her on TV.

This story has an audio version!

Written for the December 5th Writeoff Contest. Prompt: "Behind closed doors."

Ivan is just your everyday type of guy. Middle-aged, balding, Eastern European, grew up in harsh and merciless communism, and took to smoking three packs of cigarettes a day since childhood, washing it down with vodka as well. When he heard about the great opportunities the magical land of Equestria were offering, he got one of the first green cards there and opened up shop in Ponyville. A saddle shop, to be specific, where he sells saddles and saddle accessories.

Why ponies buy saddles, Ivan doesn't know, and when he finds out, he'd like very much to go back to not knowing.

Thanks to my pre-reader RedSquirrel456 for all his help.

Anon delivers a somewhat late, very unexpected birthday present to Rainbow Dash.

[ An audio version of this story has been made available courtesy of Landon. Awesome! ]

Rainbow Dash works the night shift at Freddy's for five terrifying nights.

...Except she doesn't.

Now with added Pinkie Pie!

Cover image belongs to Gardelius.

When Maud Pie officially endorses the latest party game to hit Equestria, Pinkie can't wait to share it with her friends.

For all the wrong reasons, it's a game they won't soon forget.

The trendsetter so controversial, 60% of FimFic's mods ruthlessly crushed the subsequent bandwagon!

Stuff said about CAE:
"I never knew I wanted this until now!" - Xomniac
"Despite your vileness, I can't stop laughing at this fic!" - Professor Tactitus
"Illuminati confirmed." - AlesFlamas
"So weird, I reviewed it twice!" - John Perry

Rated Teen, but brace yourselves for some rather 'near-the-knuckle' humour and strong-ish sexual references. Oh my.

Edited by Kolth