Out at sea, rockin' steam dreams and pilot valves... Deuces.
Right. Put out a new chapter, went out for burgers at Five Guys to celebrate. What follows is an surprisingly similar reaction to my own consumption. No, this is not me. This is a sophisticated gentleman who shares my taste in cuisine.
And yes, I did go off on a ghetto-ass rant, playa. Fo'shizzle. Fuck the police, and all that nonsense.
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First!
he scares me
I just had five guys a few days ago, it was beyond greatness.
Cheeseburger with bacon, fries, and a coke.
283420
IT'S FUCKING PERFECTION, MAH BROTHA
Rust is now the Gangsta Pirate!
Five Guys? Never heard of it...
had 5 guys for the first time a week ago, amazing.
Those burgers. I love them.
283431
We must save this sorry soul, lads. His cholesterol count is too low.
Yep, sounds about right...... Dawg
Can't stop watching...
I know so many people like this. Only they're not being sarcastic.
Unfortunately I don't think we have Five Guys in the south.
That makes me so jealous, all I got here is a friggin Whataburger and a Sonic. Hell I don't even think there is a 5 Guys anywhere near me. Rust, you are a troll of the highest order, without trying...
Five Guys is the feast of true men.
Nothing like that over here. All I gots is fuckin McDs and BK.. Now if I go about 1.5 hours east, I can get a Fatburger. Damn good. Meant to get one last time I went drag racing, but then I forgot.
I love Five Guys.
5 guys is the best burger place ever.
Five Guys tastes JUST like a local burger joint here. It's perfection
Unfortunately the fries aren't quite as good...
The one time I had five guys, it was crap. Customer service was pretty good, as were their fries, but the burgers were bland and tasteless. The fact that you have to order the lettuce and tomato separately irks me as well. Every other food chain gives it to you unless you tell them otherwise. I've yet to go to another five guys, since I hear that their chains are very inconsistent in quality from place to place. Until they fix that, I'm sticking with In-N-Out, because they're always good, regardless of location, though their fries suck.
283438 Oh, believe me, my cholesterol level is FAR from low... It's just that my local McDonalds puts something... "special" in their burgers... Me and my mates think its some sort of heroin knockoff or something like that, because anyone who takes even a single bite of the burgers instantly becomes addicted to them... Allow me to put into perspective of what that entails... I am the lightest person around by about 20 pounds, and I weigh in at roughly 263...
283491
They cook their patties in peanut oil, I believe. That's what gives them the taste.
283488
I pity you, friend. A good Five Guys burger is comparable to a mouth orgasm.
I love 5 Guys! McDonalds can suck it, 5 Guys is where it's at!
Also, I feel the same way whenever I bite into a 5 Guys burger.
DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Awesome stuff!
I was there once before in CT.
I looked up the closest one to where I live: ~322km.
I'm not going ~650km round-trip for a burger. Not even 5 Guys...
Five Guys rawks :D
Damm the nearest 5 Guys is 30 miles away and I still drive out of my way to go there every time I go out
just no words can describe 5 Guys
283491
Dear god. McDonalds...Hell, I went there once and got food poisoning. Godspeed.
283423
You sir, have not tasted MY hamburgers I do.
I mix Montreal steakhouse spices from clubhouse, chili flakes, hand grounded Jamaican peppercorn, Tabasco and wershesheyer sauce into semi-lean ground beef that I put on the BBQ.
As they get ready, add a slice of Kraft cheddar slices but then I crank it up to 11 with two fresh pieces of hard Parmesan cheese (the small cheese wheel is hard as rock, someone dropped on on accident on my foot at the specialized market and it really hurt so much it was hard)
And that's just the plain burger my boy, I didn't tell you what were the condiments yet!
Sliced red onions, sliced pickled jalepeno pepper, pickles, peppered tomatoes, BACON STRIPS AND BACON STRIPS AND BACON STRIPS AND BACON STRIPS, letuce, ketchup, relish, mustard (choice of Dijon, old fashioned, regular) and mayonaise.
AND THE BUNS ARE BBQ TOASTED.
Crispity crunch of that french fry
I'm hungry now.
283549
Read that description and I-
-JIZZED. IN. MY PANTS.
283423
It's the same euphoria you get from hugging Fluttershy, in beef and bacon form.
[Edit: This guy is hilarious.]
this was brilliant!... though I now have to Lement the fact that Canada doesn't have Five Guys
283585
Then get a car and drive down here. The money you spend on gas will be well wasted!
283566
They are QUITE messy to eat tough, that's the downside. EVERYTHING JUST FALLS OUT BUT YOU TRY TO STUFF EVERYTHING THAT FALLS INTO YOUR MOUTH SO THE TASTE LASTS AS LONG AS POSSIBLE XD.
283595
And then the grease.
Grease, grease everywhere!
It's like Niagara Falls, made of glorious burger grease!
From Wiki:
Men's Health magazine claims that Five Guys' meals are unhealthy. They state that a standard double patty burger, for example, contains 700 calories and 20 grams of saturated fat. Men's Health also rated Five Guys' french fries as some of the most unhealthy food in America, claiming that a standard large order of fries contains almost 1,500 calories. The Center for Science in the Public Interest placed Five Guys' bacon cheeseburger, which it claims to contain 920 calories, among its 2010 list of most unhealthy meals available at U.S. chain restaurants.
I MUST EAT THERE NOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!
Only thing that compares (in my mind) is a place called Willy's. You can get a double cheese burger with bacon and a FRIED EGG on it. Only here, in Beaumont, Texas!
283596
Actually, there is little grease coming from the burger since that goes down the BBQ, it's beef juice, actual, physical state of burger flavor.
283609
People and their science.
and now I want 5 guys at 1230 at night....damn
After watching this video, I felt ashamed for what I had for dinner.
Has first tried five guys over 5 years ago.
Love it
This man is awesome. You sir, are also extremely awesome.
Edit: Are Five Guys Burger and Fries only in America? I'm in Canada. For once I' am disappointed because I'm Canadian.
283585 I feel your pain. No Five Guys in Albera either.
283591 Wish I could but one, I'm not old enough to drive. Two, I don't have a passport. Three, I'd need my parents approval.
We have a Five Guys about 5 minutes from us. Never had it. Rust likes them? Fuck it, I'm gettin' that shit!
Ah, I remember my first Five Guys... It was, without a doubt, the greatest. food. in creation.
Seriously, the reason Prometheus gave man fire was so he could make burgers, and brother, Five Guys is to Prometheus what Mecca is to Allah.
ya could see you going DAMNDAMNDAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLAYA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
*Reads that it isn't Rust*
Aw now its not as funny
I have made my decision about my life: I will leave crummy Britain and move to the United States! You guys always get the good stuff, like the Hub, Five Guys, ComiCon, Star Trek, and the chance to watch the season 3 premier before everyone else!
I don't care anymore! Money doesn't matter, I can stay at my uncle's, and nopony's can stop me!
...
...just realised that I need a new passport...
283431
Heard of In N Out Burgers? Five Guys is the US East Coast variation. Really good, really greasy, fantastic fries... and you don't feel guilty dropping $20 on a meal there for two.