Training.
For copyright/disclaimer information, see Chapter One.
Version 1.0
Published 3/23/13
Chapter Eighteen: Training.
147 days to start of Regency.
The Coronation Party was in full swing in the Grand Ballroom. Ponies from all walks of life mulled about and chatted excitedly. Balloons, streamers, and banners all bearing Twilight's coloration or cutie mark hung from the walls, ceiling, and tables. Several rectangular tables were packed with a variety of foods and drinks. There was even an assortment of the finest salts for those who wished to truly indulge. Around one of the tables sat six mares and a dragon, celebrating one of them becoming Equestria's third princess.
Twilight looked around the room at the many balloons, streamers, and banners that adorned the hall.
“I must say, Pinkie, you've done an amazing job. I didn't think you could get all this done in under a day.”
Pinkie finished chugging her tenth glass of punch and sat the plastic goblet down on the table.
“Thanks, Twilight. It was great working with the castle staff to get this fun party together. I couldn't believe they had the old Type III balloons.”
“Type 3?”
Pinkie shook her head.
“No, no , no. Type III. The roman numerals make it sound older.”
“Roman numerals? What are yo—never mind.”
Pinkie gazed lovingly at the balloons.
“Yeah, they're super rare, on account of the fact they caused the Great Manehatten Fire of 899 and were banned.”
Everypony at the table stopped what they were doing and looked at Pinkie.
“What.”
Twilight stared at Pinkie.
“So what you're telling me is that a balloon that caused one of Equestria's worst disasters is currently being used inside of the heart of the country's capitol. In a building full of the most important ponies in the country.”
“Yup, but there's nothing to worry about. The balloons that caused the fire were filled with hydrogen and—”
Twilight breathed a sigh of relief and interrupted Pinkie.
“And these ones are filled with inert helium. Good job, Pinki—”
Pinkie returned the interrupting favor.
“No. Due to the scarcity of helium, it can only be used in airships. These balloons are filled with hydrogen, just like every other balloon.”
Twilight's and everypony else's eyes widened as they glanced to the many highly flammable spheres that were suspended in the air.
“Then how in tarnation are these balloon's safer?”
“That's easy. They're suspended at least one hundred centimeters above the ground. Well away from flammable sources.”
Twilight gritted her teeth.
“Pinkie!”
Before she could continue, Princess Celestia walked up.
“How are you all doing?”
“We're doing fine, Princess.”
Twilight opted not to inform Celestia of the fire hazard.
“That's good. I hope you're enjoying things while you can.”
“Why?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Because, with the Regency fast approaching, and you being me and Luna's choice, there's a lot that must be done.”
Twilight gulped.
**********
143 days to start of Regency.
Luna narrowed her eyes at Twilight.
“Neigh, Twilight. That won't do at all.”
The purple alicorn let out the breath she had been holding and let her back sag back down from its tensed up position.
“Oh come on, Luna! You can't really expect me to maintain this posture. It's horrible for my back.”
Luna raised an eyebrow.
“You're an immortal alicorn with enough magic to flatten the five boroughs of New Yoke using a Mk III Megaspell. I don't believe your back is in any danger.” Luna smirked, “Besides, if me, Celestia, and Cadance had to do it then you do to.”
“That's extremely petty.”
“We're a petty group. I still haven't fully forgiven Celestia for replacing my shampoo with chocolate syrup.”
Twilight stifled a laugh. While it was true the media tended to exaggerate the pranks that went on in the castle, that didn't mean they didn't happen.
“Chuckle merrily now, weep bitterly latter. But enough of that. Let us now focus on another important piece of princess etiquette.”
“What?”
“The Royal Canterlot Voice!”
Twilight was slightly blown back by the loudness.
“What? I thought we did away with that?”
“Tis true th—” Luna cleared her throat, “Pardon. While it's true that the Voice is no longer suited for daily interactions with the citizens, that doesn't mean it isn't still used.”
“Like when?”
“For one, during military training exercises or combat situations. Nothing can strike fear into our enemies or bolster the spirits of our forces like a strong voice of leadership. It's also useful for corralling those parasites known as Parliament or the leeches of the nobility during Night Court. I've also learned that employing it at sporting events during the short periods of mirth that occur when our team does well is also welcome.”
“Alright. So it still has its uses.”
Luna moved next to a table and quickly stacked some soda pop cans into a pyramid.
“Now then, from a distance of ten cubits, try to knock the cans over using your voice.”
“Ten cubits?”
Luna rolled her eyes.
“Fifteen feet.”
Twilight moved back to a distance she guessed was fifteen feet and took a deep breath.
“Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!”
The cans didn't so much as jostle slightly.
“No, Twilight. You must tap into the inner strength of your diaphragm and vocal cords. Like this!”
Twilight reset herself and took another deep breath.
'Inner strength. What does that even mean?'
“Aaaahhh!”
“Nay, Twilight. You still aren't fully grasping the complexities of it.”
'Oh, Come on!'
Twilight's frustration mounted.
“Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!”
“There is a large difference between simple screams and the Voice, Twilight.”
'Grah!'
“Stupid Voice!”
The cans tumbled over. Luna was enthused.
“Very good, Twilight. You have succeeded in channeling your frustrations. There are still a great many improvements to make, but for now, let's move on to the next item.”
The purple alicorn deflated.
“Just how many parts of 'Princess Etiquette' are left?”
“By my count, two hundred and fourteen.”
“Horseapples!”
**********
106 days to start of Regency.
“What do you mean they're here?!”
Twilight frantically searched for her crown. Solar Flare looked on bemusedly.
“I mean, there here to see you now.”
“This isn't good. Princess Celestia never told me what the Cosmic Council wanted!”
Solar Flare levitated over Twilight's crown.
“I don't see any reason to fret, Your Majesty. They're merely going to test your alicorn...ness.”
Twilight froze.
“Test my alicornness? Like the High Court?”
Flare put a hoof to his chin in thought.
“I suppose that would be an accurate assessment.”
“Not gonna happen. I'm not getting shot again just to satisfy some bureaucratic red tape.”
Flare reeled back.
“What?! You'd defy the Cosmic Council? That's extremely inadvisable.”
Twilight stood firm.
“They can take their little 'immortality test' and shove it right up—”
The door opened and a servant poked her head in.
“The representatives from the Cosmic Council are here to see you.”
Twilight politely smiled.
“Tell them I won't be—”
Flare interrupted.
“Making them wait any longer and will see them now.”
The servant nodded before leaving.
“Solar Flare!”
“As High Overseer, it is my job to ensure that the Crown is held to the highest public standards. Not seeing the representatives would be a disservice and—”
Twilight lobbed a pillow at him and struck him right in the mouth, causing a small explosion of feathers.
Before either could talk, the door opened again and two mares wearing formal wear walked in. One had a briefcase suspended in her telekinesis. They both wore badges with “Diplomat” and the logo of the Cosmic Council laminated on them.
“Good afternoon, Your Majesty.”
They both bowed. The other spoke.
“Allow us to introduce ourselves. My name is Sautéed Rice, Equestrian Ambassador to the Cosmic Council.”
She looked over to the other mare.
“And my name is Neutral Zone, High Commissioner of CCOCONUTS, or the Cosmic Council Organization for Cooperative Oversight of Natural and Universal Territories and Satellites.”
Twilight looked somewhat confused.
“CCOCONUTS?”
“Yes, we mainly handle compliance with the Celestial Bodies Treaty. If somepony were to fail to maintain the designated schedule of the planetary orbit, or another major cosmological function—as per the Treaty, CCOCONUTS would organize the Council's response.”
“But if you handle that, why are you here?”
“Under Article Fourteen, Section Twenty of the Treaty, all alicorns must be certified with CCOCONUTS in case another natural phenomenon—say, the stars—were to stop working for some reason and another alicorn was needed to control them.”
Rice undid the briefcase's latches and opened it.
“To that end, we must complete a test to determine if you're actually an alicorn.”
'Great, what's in the briefcase. Trifluoromethanesulfonic acid they'll throw on me? Poison? A bomb?'
She removed a needle.
'Oh wonderful, it's poison.'
“If you'd be so kind as to not resist.”
Twilight sighed, before letting Rice poke the needle into her leg.
'I wonder what kind of poison. Cyanide to stop the heart? Or maybe it's spider venom that'll cause severe cramps.'
She was surprised when, instead of injecting something, Rice withdrew some blood.
“There we go.”
After putting a patch of gauze over the needle wound, Rice poured the blood into a vial.
“What're doing?”
“Why, I'm performing a blood test to determine if you're an alicorn.”
Twilight's jaw dropped.
“A—A blood test?”
Rice levitated up another vial that had a clear liquid in it.
“Yup. Once I pour this liquid into the blood, if it turns green, you're an alicorn, if it turns blue, you aren't.”
“Wha?!”
She poured in the liquid and, after a few shakes, the blood turned green.
Rice smiled.
“And there we go. Congratulations, Your Majesty.”
Twilight continued to stare in shock.
“So let me get this straight. You aren't going to try to kill me to prove if I'm immortal?”
The two diplomats looked at each other.
“No!”
“Of course not. Where'd you get such an idea from? That would be the most idiotic, insane, and downright silly—not to mention potentially lethal—method to test it with.”
'I'm going to kill them.'
Neutral Zone retrieved a clipboard from the briefcase.
“Now that that's done, we just need to ask you a few questions. First, what is your favorite object in the solar system that isn't the sun or moon?”
“I guess Haylley's Comet.”
“Okay. Do you hold any grudges against any other country?”
“Well, the changelings tried to invade a little while back, brainwash and feed on my brother, and turn my friends and family against me before trapping me in a cave network to die of dehydration or starvation.”
Both diplomats stared at her.
“So...that would be a 'yes'?”
**********
61 days to start of Regency.
Twilight looked at the obsidian helmet.
“I don't know if this is a good idea.”
Luna scoffed.
“This is a brilliant idea, Twilight.” she lowered the helmet onto Twilight's head, “Twill be the greatest Ball Canterlot has seen in generations.”
Twilight looked at the black and silver armor that adorned her body.
“It seems too, I don't know, predictable?” she levitated over a loosely bound stack of papers and looked through them, “I mean, I was researching a book on Dark Magic but succumbed to its evil influences? I already know Dark Magic, Princess Celestia taught it to me and—”
Luna waved a hoof dismissively.
“They will be too paralyzed in terror to care about those minor details.”
“But what about my public image? This can't be good for it.”
The Lunar Diarch continued to stare on skeptically.
“Twilight, last year the Night Guard staged a coup and decapitated Celestia. They are currently the most popular part of the armed forces. You have nothing to worry about.”
“Decapitated?!”
Twilight shuddered at the mental image.
Luna smiled wistfully.
“Oh yes, sister wished to make things extra horrifying. I wanted to do it, but with Ponyville beckoning and Aurora having spent weeks working on his evil laugh I simply couldn't. Maybe next time.”
Twilight continued to examine the armor.
“I'm just not comfortable with this.”
“Please, Twilight. You must. Look,” Luna levitated over the Element of Magic. Instead of a shiny, polished Big Crown Thingy, the gold was worn and tarnished. The jewel that made up the Element was black and cracked, “The royal jeweler spent days making an exact replica.”
“Bu—”
“We received special permission from the Cosmic Council to delay the sunset by an hour. Do you know how hard that was? Secretary-General Kiwi Moon is a notorious bureaucrat.”
“It's just—”
“We won't get another opportunity like this for another two years!”
Luna gave her best puppy dog face.
“Fine.” Twilight yanked the corrupted Element of Magic and placed it atop her head, “I'll play along with this, but don't be surprised when it all ends horribly.”
She began to stomp her way out of the room but was halted by Luna's telekinesis.
“Twilight, you forgot the contacts and fangs.”
-----
Canterlot Castle's Grand Ballroom was decked out in the finest black and silver decorations. Several Jack-o-lanterns lay throughout the hall. Various decorations draped from the ceiling and walls. Party goers meandered about, dressed in their costumes. At the front of the room, standing on a platform in between two Night Guardstallions, was Celestia, who was wearing a jester's hats.
Two young stallions sat at one of the tables.
“So what do you think this year's prank is going to be?”
“I don't know, man, I just don't see how they could top beheading Princess Celestia.”
“Pff. You call that a prank. Everypony knew that was set up from the start. These things are so predictable now. Everypony sees 'em coming a mile away.”
The other stallion glanced around nervously.
“That's exactly what I'm worried about. This would be the perfect time for something serious to go down. When everypony's guard is the most relaxed.”
The other one ribbed him.
“You worry too much. Just you watch. Pre-dict-able.”
Celestia spoke.
“Fillies and Gentlecolts, with the setting of the sun, it is my proud honor to declare this year's Nightmare Night Ball officially star—”
The candles that illuminated the room were snuffed out. The smoke from the candles drifted towards the stage. A menacing chuckle filled the room as the anxious party goers looked around.
The two guards' wings flared open as they took a defensive stance around Celestia.
“Now, everypony. Remain calm. I'm sure there's nothing to be worried about.”
“Oh?”
The smoke coalesced into the form of an equine.
Celestia narrowed her eyes at the armored purple alicorn.
“Twilight? What are you doing?”
“First, my name isn't Twilight any longer. Second, I'm doing what I should have done all those years ago when my true power was unleashed. I'm taking over.”
The guards got ready to attack, only to be stopped by Celestia.
“Now, Twilight, I don't know what's happened, but you need to stop this foolishness now.”
Twilight gave a mocking laugh.
“This? Foolish? What's foolish is listening to the blatherings of a senile old mare who thinks she has the right to be Equestria's leader. No, this is anything but foolish.”
Celestia narrowed her eyes.
“Twilight, I'm warning you, stop this. Now.”
“Or what? You'll make me write a friendship letter? Please. The Oksh'egn Nuba'kryygwquo was right, you really are weak.”
The Solar Diarch's eyes widened in shock.
“Twilight! You weren't supposed to read that book yet. Unless properly trained, it's corrupting influence will consume you.”
The purple nightmare smirked.
“I believe you mean 'has'.”
Celestia's face grew grim before she leapt into the air and shot a beam of golden magic at Twilight. Twilight responded by casting a purple shield that the beam deflected off of and careened into on the statues, causing it to explode in a rain of pebbles. The crowd began screaming and trying to escape.
Twilight's horn lit up, causing the Element of Magic on her head to glow a sickening black. A beam of Dark Magic shot from it and struck Celestia as she attempted to dodge. Celestia let out an anguished scream as her body was slowly turned to stone. The statue fell to the platform where it lodged into the wood.
“Princess!”
The two guards shot into the air and closed in on Twilight. She smirked, before firing a bolt of magic at one of them. He exploded in a mist of blood that caused the other one to spin out of control before he crashed into on the concession tables and was knocked out.
“Now then, if that takes care of the competition, I believe I have a power base to consolidate.”
“Oh, please.”
The crowd and Twilight turned their attention to two stallions still sitting at one of the tables. One of them looked petrified while the other looked annoyed.
“Seems there's a heckler. I suppose the National Defense Council can wait for a minute.”
“Do you really think I'm going to fall for this? Every year something 'horrifying' happens at this Ball and every year you ponies fall for it. Not this time. I'm calling your blu—”
In an instant, Twilight was next to him. Her tail slithered around his body while her serpentine eyes glistened.
“You think this is a foalish prank? That this is a game? Look outside.”
Everypony turned their attention to the windows and the sun that had just slipped passed the horizon.
Twilight's horn lit up and to the astonishment and horror of the party goers and Equestria in general, the sun rose back up and affixed itself in a permanent sunset.
The stallion's face was now one of pure terror.
“Would a mere prank be able to accomplish that?”
“I—I—I—I—”
Twilight turned her attention to the other patrons.
“I suggest you all grow accustomed to my beautiful sunset, because it is now a permanent feature of the western sky. Henceforth, the eternal reign of Nightmare Dusk has begun!”
Dusk let loose a lengthy evil laugh as the party guests stared on in unabridged horror.
**********
17 days to start of Regency.
Once again, the Courtroom of the High Court of Equestria was packed. The nine justices sat, ready to deliver the court's verdict. Solicitor General Cloudy Skies sat with several other government attorneys. On the opposite side, Ministry of Defense Lead Counsel Court Order sat with other MoD attorneys. In the gallery, surrounded by several Royal Guardstallions, Princesses Celestia and Twilight sat.
Twilight looked over to the other side of the gallery and saw several military brass sitting together. She was able to identify Admiral Flight Deck and Captain Aurora Borealis from the group. While Flight Deck had a serious expression on her face and stared ahead, Borealis seemed relaxed and let his gaze wander around the courtroom. Everypony's attention centered on Docket Number when he spoke.
“After careful deliberations, in the expedited case of Her Royal Highness, Princess Celestia v Flight Deck, the High Court has ruled in a 7-2 vote that Royal Decree E-375 violates Article 5 of the Equestrian Constitution. The Solicitor General failed to prove that releasing the former tyrant Discord from his prison would not pose a clear and present danger to the safety and security of Equestria. While the High Court appreciates, and is honored by, the efforts of the Bearers of the Elements to maintain harmony and safety, the High Court cannot be guaranteed with reasonable certainty that they would make a suitable 'failsafe' in the event that Discord's rehabilitation proves unsuccessful.
Furthermore, the Court also finds the Decree in violation of Article 14 of the Constitution. While both of Discord's imprisonments were unilateral actions not originally sanctioned by the court system, the threat he posed waved the court's oversight. In this context, Princess Celestia's attempted unilateral action overstepped her authority in a clearly legal matter that should have been handled by the Court of Appeals for the First Circuit.
Royal Decree E-375 is struck down as unconstitutional. Discord is ordered to remain imprisoned in the Canterlot Statue Garden for his crimes against equinity. District Court for the District of Canterlot affirmed. Court adjourned.”
“All rise.”
The court and the ponies in the gallery stood to leave.
Twilight looked over to Flight Deck and saw a smug grin on her face. Borealis was also grinning, but he had been from the start of the court session. She looked back to Celestia.
“What are you going to do now, Princess?”
Celestia looked down to Twilight.
“I'll abide by the Court's decision.”
“But, what about your plans for Discord?”
The two slowly made their way out of the building.
“If there's one thing I've learned over the years, it's to watch my little ponies carefully. This decision shows they're simply not ready for Discord's release. Maybe with time, they'll come to understand, but that time is not now. Discord's not going anywhere. He's been there a thousand plus years, I'm sure he can wait a few more and when the ponies of Equestria are ready to embrace him, I'm more then certain that he'll be ready to embrace them as well.”
Twilight looked back to the victorious Flight Deck with continued worry.
'Something just doesn't feel right about her.'
**********
0 days to start of Regency.
“I'm not coming out.”
Dash rammed the door again.
“C'mon, Twilight! The official handing over of power ceremony is in two hours and the Princesses want to talk to you.”
“No. They'll have to cancel it.”
Dash facehooved.
“Oh for crying out loud. You had four months to suffer a nervous breakdown and you choose the day you're supposed to take over? You can't back out of this now!”
“Watch me.”
Dash rustled the door handle but still couldn't get in.
“Twilight! Everypony's counting on you.”
“They'll have to count on somepony else.”
Dash smiled deviously.
“You wouldn't want to disappoint the Princess Celestia, would you?”
“That's not going to work, Rainbow. Princess Celestia will understand.”
Dash was somehow able to make a snapping noise with her hooves despite the fact she didn't have fingers.
“Twilight, please. You have to knock this off. Equestria needs you, we need you, the princesses need you.”
“I just can't! I'm gonna mess everything up. I just know it.”
“No, you won't! You're gonna do great, but you'll definitely mess up if you can't go out there and do it. Is that what you want? Another one of those—what was it called—predeposit paradoxes to happen?”
“Predestination paradox. And no, I don't. I know it'll end badly, though. Everpony will hate me, and I'll be forced into exile.”
Twilight undid the lock and opened the door.
“You do realize you sounded like Rarity just then, don't you?”
Twilight's face lit up in modest embarrassment.
“Yeah. I guess I was just being an overly panicked ball of nerves again, wasn't I?”
“You sure were. Now hurry up, the princesses want to talk to you.”
To Be Continued in Regent...
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AWW YEA BONUS CHAPTER
and FIRST! << redacted
Loved the Nightmare Night scene. Twilight's had plenty of practice in acting insane, so she'd do it very convincingly.
2309307
Acting?
I am laughing so hard at that.
And back to laughing really hard.
2309395
Oh yes. There's a trick to it, you see.
this is about third best chapter of the all, or was it second?
2309395>>2309307
Yeah Twilight doesn't ACT insane. She is insane. On occasion but still.
We're all a little crazy.
2309445
Pretty sure they aren't abusing their immortality. Considering this line: "He exploded in a mist of blood that caused the other one to spin out of control before he crashed into on the concession tables and was knocked out." Guards aren't immortal, so the whole thing, even the decapitation, is probably a staged 'smoke and mirror' kind of gag.
“Because, with the Regency fast approaching, and you being me and Luna's choice, there's a lot that must be done.”
Don't get me wrong the chapter was amazing, but in this little part I'm questioning Celestia's grammar. While she certainly isn't afraid to cut loose every once in awhile, I find it hard to believe she gets sloppy with her grammar. I don't know, just a personal head canon thing.
Nightmare Dusk was written really well. When Celestia turned to stone, I was honestly kind of scared.
yay bonus chapter
Great end to the sory. Can't wait to read the sequel.
When the Nightmare Dusk scene transitioned to a court scene I thought Twilight got in some serious trouble for taking the prank too far. lol.
Need to fix that...
From now on, when I read about what the UN is up to and its South Korean leader, I'll be laughing
I'll have you know politicians are quite intelligent They have the ability to get less done a day than Garfield the cat. It takes dedication and skill to be that irresponsible.
It sounds like Luna is a Cubs fan too.
About that... Is there some way around it? Some way to get alerts for everything an author does, rather than potentially fail to realise that a sequel or a new work has been posted? Because, really, what is up with that!?
2311024
The only way I know is to "follow" an author. Then, you're notified whenever they post a story or blog post.
2311218
But of course, when someone's been on the site for a long time, they're following so many authors that the feed is so clogged you might as well not be following any of them. The old feed it was okay, but the new one... Not a chance. I appreciate the "bonus chapter", even if it is just a "sequel's out", but especially when it is used creatively as you have done.
Crossed fingers for Twilight actually going darkmagic in Regent.
Don't need fingers here, the Phalanx Joints (Horse 'finger' bones) have their own cluster of Synovial sacs (the part that makes the actual 'crack' sound, most the time anyway)
This isn't unheard of either, though not equestrially trained, I have observed horses before and it's not uncommon for them to crack their hooves after long periods of the joints not being moved.
Loved this line. and makes sense. Police have a small kit to use at crime scenes, it's a bottle of a chemical and a swab. Blood plus chemical on swab will show a discolouration. Purple means it wasn't human blood.
As barbaric as the first test was, it makes sense though. If somepony had attempted to screw with genetics and all that.
I really do like where this story is going.
Now off to the sequal...
That was a great story. Now I shall venture towards the sequel!
Well damn. I was hoping Twi would actually turn the High Court into potted plants or something. Clearly they are completely unfit to run anything more important than a concert for the deaf.
Two things:
1. When writing "(other person/s) and (first person pronoun)" phrases, there are two things to keep in mind: Firstly, the speaker should be last in the list. Secondly, the pronoun should the one that would be used were there no others mentioned. Thus, "me and Luna's choice" should be "Luna's and my choice" and "me, Celestia, and Cadance had to" should be "Celestia, Cadance, and I had to." Sorry, pet peeve.
2. That last sequence of dialogue got really weird as it went on. It seems like Twilight was talking to herself at the end. A few more attributions would be appreciated.
Other than that, a great ending. Now to read Regent!
That kind of "wave" is spelled with an i ("waived"). Also, there should be a quote at the start of that paragraph (grammar is weird)
*they're
Also, have an awesome song to top it all.
[youtube=BJ0xBCwkg3E]
Now I'm wondering if the alicorns have an unofficial competition going as to who can start the biggest riot with their 'harmless prank'.
Is something missing here? Hard to believe Dash said that last line.
You know what would be an awesome alt universe thing? If Twilight really was corrupted, was faking hesitance to lower everypony's guard, and the events in the ballroom wasn't acting on her part.
Loved the Nightmare Night scene, although I was a little disappointed there was no follow up to it to describe what the aftermath might have been like.
Heading off to read sequel now...
I SWEAR YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST OF COCONUT WE SHALL RETURN!!!!
Sorry I know it doesn't really fit but it made me laugh and I had to put it out there
; I loved the chapter btw
Oh, so 1 final chapter...I knew I saw it say completed a while ago...time for the sequel!
That was an awesome story!
The reason I like writing fanfics was because of good stories like this
not to mention this was the first ponyfic I read.I love you now
2313198
actually so was I
great scene though
wonderful chapter, however, sometimes I think the comedy can be a little to much... this chapter had some things stretched a little over the top.
2314959
In fact, I have to admit that when I first read it, and the scene switched to the trial, I first thought Celestia and Twi had been put on trial for the Nightmare Night stunt.
2315229
LOL so did I!!
But I noticed the gap in days and thought 'that can't be right'.
>>>“There is a large difference between simple screams and the Voice, Twilight.”>>
Twilight has learned to use The Voice!
fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2013/029/8/d/princess_twilight_muad_dib_by_pixelkitties-d5t6t0r.png
>>>Twilight looked back to the victorious Flight Deck with continued worry.
'Something just doesn't feel right about her.'>>>
So kill her, for crying out loud! Sheesh, when will budding tyrants learn to go with their paranoid instincts?
I do it right! Not one of my enemies remains...
I think this bonus chapter could've been a stand alone, one-parter story but.....it's cool.
Looking forward to reading the Sequel.....eventually; have other things to do first.
2315229>>2310371 I agree, that should've been the trial, due to the fact that the Nightmare Dusk prank had gone horribly wrong.
2312376 Twilight, hooves down.
2315330
....
....
....
I swear in the name of Celestia, with the stuff you post, you'd have to be the Toby Barrett of FimFic.
2315532 You're starting to give me bad feelings now... *sets up the 'equipment' in his basement..* We can't have that! *off-key singing* Internal organs and bloody spray, make the bad feelings go away!
(Grim dark is so easy. Tis why I don't write it. Takes few brains to be insane, you know!)
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Well played Nightmare Dusk...
But where was the ending to that prank! I wanted to see their reactions! How could you!
You said " No wonder Nightmare!Twilight is such a popular story, it's really fun to write." but I've only found one good one; A New Nightmare, by LittleAngelStocking. Can anyone point me to some good ones? I like the idea of an evil Twilight. She would make a good villain.
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When it comes to evil!Twilight, there's: Inner Demons (which is a codifier for Nightmare!Twi), The Twilight Empire is looking like it might be one (that first chapter seems awfully propaganda-y), A Unicorn's Requiem has her going insane, What Choice Do I Have plays that "rapiddash" scene for [Grimdark], she's not evil in Penumbra, but is in one of those "the world's imploded in on itself so I have to reign with an iron fist" kind of situations, while she isn't evil in Apprentice of the Stars, that cover art seems very foreboding, Time Waits For No Mare has her as the not-yet-appearing evil dictator (and is where the "High Chancellor" comment is from), Magic Corrupted uses a World War Z style interview story format to tell of her [Grimdark] escapades with the Alicorn Amulet, Empress of Monsters is extremely mindscrewy but I think she's an evil over
lordlady in it, For Want of a Dawn (a sequel to another story) has an AU version of her as Equestria's Queen, Homecoming has her as a sort of anti-hero, Star Gazing has her go Nightmare according to the comments, but I read it a while back and have forgotten exactly what happens, Wrath has her going Nightmare as well, Sunshine and Fire has her AU self be Nightmare!Celestia's dragon. Then there's the really [Grimdark] ones: Severing is to Twilight as Cupcakes is to Pinkie, then there's the gorn that is Pages of Harmony.I was thinking about starting an "Evil Twilight" group considering the abundance of stories.
This story is amazing, from Twilight's discovery of her alicornness to the events leading to her ascension; I had to force myself to stop to get some sleep, and almost immediately after finishing breakfast I came back to finish reading it. I especially liked finding out that Princess Celestia had been ready for the events in which the mares turn into alicorns. I almost thought that they had planned this all along.
2316474 Well, Thank you. Do create an Evil Twilight Group, I would be the first to join. Strangely, I love a good "Twilight turns EVIL" story.
I have actually read Penumbra. Good story. I am currently waiting on A New Nightmare (slow updates), which is the classic (and yet unusually hard to find, probably because it seems cliché) 'Nightmare corrupts Twilight, and she turns evil, just like Luna' story.
{Edit}: I haven't read Penumbra, I've read the Petriculture series, which has Twilight become evil in the second one (kind of, she's not really evil, but corrupted by Nightmare), and has a CHARACTER named Penumbra. How many different places on Fimfiction is the word Penumbra used, because I know of two stories and a character, and I had never even HEARD of the word before.
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Penumbra, noun:
1. The partially shaded outer region of the shadow cast by an opaque object.
2. The shadow cast by the earth or moon over an area experiencing a partial eclipse.
Plus, it's a pretty cool word.
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It's actually a legal term.
2325911 Yah, I know, I looked it up while reading Inscape.
I died. Thanks a lot.
My sides...