"Alrighty, I can't wait!" Pinkie exclaimed as she hopped out of the kitchen with Twilight.
"Good, now I just have to go tell the others." Twilight said.
"What are you two talking about?" Church asked.
"I'll tell you later." Twilight replied quickly.
"Uh, okay then." Church said quietly.
"Are the cookies cold yet?" Caboose asked.
"I don't know are they?" Pinkie asked in return. In response, Caboose grabbed a couple cookies and tossed them into his mouth and gurgled happily. "I take it they are good." Pinkie giggled.
"Can I have one?" Spike asked.
Pinkie nodded and Spike repeated what Caboose had done.
"Something Caboose cooked didn't kill someone upon ingestion?" Church asked sarcastically.
"You should try one too Church!" Pinkie said happily.
Church opened his mouth to speak, but Pinkie tossed a cookie in to it. Church bit down in to it and was pleasantly surprised.
"This isn't half bad Caboose." Church said.
"What half is it?" Caboose asked through the chewed up cookies in his mouth.
"The good kind." Spike said.
"Are we allowed to be eating these? Shouldn't they be on sale here in the shop?" Church asked.
"Nope. The Cakes decided that they wanted to see if Caboose could bake so they could have more days off." Pinkie said. She grabbed a cookie and quickly ate it. "This was a test and I would say he passed with flying cookies!"
"Yay!" Caboose exclaimed after swallowing the cookies. "This is the first test I passed since kindergarten!"
"Well I think we should be on our way, I need to go talk to the other girls." Twilight said.
"Don't you want a cookie?" Caboose asked.
"No that's quite fine thank y-"
Twilight met Caboose's puppy dog eyes and sighed.
"Okay, I'll have one." Twilight said.
She trotted up to the plate, grabbed one and took a bite out of it.
"Aw, can't I stay and have some more?" Spike asked sadly.
"If Pinkie doesn't mind." Twilight replied.
"No problem Twi! We are going to be making some more treats and we could use a third party." Pinkie said happily.
"What about the other two parties?" Caboose asked.
"Are you coming Church or do you want to stay too?" Twilight asked.
"Since Caboose seems to be staying out of trouble I guess I'll come." Church replied.
"Great." Twilight smiled. "We'll come back and pick Spike up when we're done, okay Pinkie?"
"Okie dokie." Pinkie said.
"So whose place are we going to first?" Church asked.
"Well I already talked to Fluttershy while I was at her place, so I think we should go to Rarity since she’s the closest." Twilight replied.
"Sounds good to me." Church said.
Church and Twilight left Sugar Cube Corner and made their way to the Carousel Boutique. Once they arrived they walked through the door to see Simmons writing on a piece of paper.
"Oh hey Church. Hey Twilight. What are you guys doing here?" Simmons asked without turning to see them.
"I came to talk to Rarity, do you know where she is?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah, she's up in her room." Simmons said.
"Is she working on something?" Twilight asked.
"No, I'm pretty sure she's just resting right now." Simmons answered. "Feel free to go up and see her."
"Thanks." Twilight said, starting towards the stairs.
"So what are you writing?" Church asked.
"Just making some notes." Simmons replied.
"Notes about what?" Church asked curiously.
"Well I have been using a lot of magic recently and I find myself managing to do more and more every day." Simmons said. "I'm trying to find out when I might start reaching my limit so I don't go over it."
"Wait, you can do magic?" Church said in disbelief.
"Yeah, it's really easy and Rarity said that I am making great progress." Simmons laughed.
"Really? I can't even do the simplest of things and you're already well off." Church muttered. "Do you think you could try and teach me?"
"Isn't Twilight supposed to be really good on the magical front?" Simmons asked. "That's what Rarity told me at least."
"Yeah she tried to teach me but we made no progress." Church said.
"Well I'm not exactly a master or anything. Plus I'm not exactly a teacher either." Simmons laughed.
"Couldn't hurt to try though." Church said.
Simmons shrugged and stopped writing on the paper.
"Alright I guess." Simmons said slowly. "The first thing you need to do is clear yo-"
"Clear my mind, Twilight already told me that." Church said. "What next?"
"Do you have a weird feeling in your horn?" Simmons asked.
"Well this is awkward..." Church grunted.
"That's not what I meant." Simmons muttered. "Do you have this heavy feeling on your forehead?"
"Yeah, I thought I was just starting to get a headache though." Church said.
"Well try and push that feeling towards your horn." Simmons started. "Once you feel it building up try to focus on this piece of paper and imagine yourself lifting it up."
Church nodded as Simmons placed a piece of paper on the table. Church stared at the paper and his horn started to glow faintly after a few seconds. Church started grunting as he felt the pressure build up in his horn and his horn started to glow brighter and brighter. Simmons stared slack jawed at Church.
"What are you looking at? It's not moving." Church grunted in a strained voice.
"Turn around." Simmons said quietly.
Church kept his mind on the paper as he turned around. There were dozens of things in the air. Chairs, clothes, drawers, and everything else behind him was surrounded by a light blue glow.
"What's going on?" Twilight asked from the top of the stairs, feeling a large magical presence in the room.
Church lost all focus on the paper and everything fell to the ground. Church suddenly had all the released energy rush back into his head and he fell to the ground in pain.
"Church!" Twilight yelled, running down the stairs. "Are you okay?"
"Holy fuck my head is killing me." Church said, gritting his teeth.
"Just calm down. What did you do?" Twilight asked slowly.
"He asked me to try and show him how to use magic, but his magic seems to have missed the target and hit basically everything else in the room." Simmons said.
"Just like the old days." Church chuckled through the pain that continued to build up. "I think it's getting worse."
"You were lifting a lot of objects." Simmons noted. "I had a migraine for an hour after lifting about ten pounds of letters, and you were lifting possibly over a thousand pounds."
"Hold still." Twilight said.
Twilight slowly lowered her horn to Church's forehead and it started to glow. Twilight made a small grunt and Church felt the pounding in his head significantly lessened.
"What did you do?" Church asked.
"I absorbed some of the pain." Twilight cringed. "I'm used to that feeling after using magic for so long, but you had a lot more of it than I thought. I didn't manage to dissipate the pain completely, but you should be a lot better off now. Simmons do you mind getting me a glass of water?"
"Sure." Simmons said, quickly leaving to get her the drink.
"You didn't have to do that." Church said.
"Nonsense, that's what are friends are for." Twilight chuckled weakly.
"Thanks." Church said quietly. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"
"Yes, I just need to rest for a few minutes." Twilight said. "After that our next stop is Sweet Apple Acres."
"Sounds good to me." Church said with a smile.
453786
It's more or less because they are in the Epsilon unit and since he is Epsilon... well yeah
453786
yes but we all know that church cant aim for shit.
453797 As long as he doesn't aim for what he is trying to hit, he might be able do whatever he's trying to do. Or something.
453826
At least he has friends to make his life better
... wait
He hates his "friends"
453863
You're fired. "At least I'm not Church."
You're being evicted. "At least I'm not Church."
You have cancer, you are going to die. "Could be worse. At least I'm not Church."
Sounds good to me.
453869 Agreed, it really sucks to be church. This discussion just reevaluated the show for me, and now I'm slightly depressed. I was happy from the chapter, so now I'm back to normal. Huh. Soooo, with a bit of practice, being Epsilon in the unit, will the princesses be donning this face anytime soon?
454069
Not anytime soon
As smart as Church is he's an idiot
FUCK I MISSED! That made me laugh hard. I thought I was only few how watched A LOT of RvB you sir keep proving to me that the RvB formula is brilliant!
Good episode by the way
454134 So true... Unless Delta makes an appearance...
Caboose is best pony.
Church misses the one thing he's aiming at and hits everything else?
Just like the sniper rifle :3
I'd thumb up the story for that reference alone, but I already have.
455063
Without a doubt.
Yeah, that's the one thing about this story is that the characters are a little off. They all seem too friendly and tolorant. Especially Blue team. Church absolutley hates Tucker and Caboose, and would probably try to ignore them at all costs. Other than that though, the characters are just alike! Sarge could try to kill Grif more though.
457308
Church doesn't really hate Caboose, he just doesn't like him that's all.
He is just making sure Caboose hasn't destroyed anything yet.
And with Tucker he still hates him.
Plus I'm sure being in a place where you aren't constantly trying to be murdered/mutilated would lift your spirits too.
Seriously Church, stop aiming at what you're trying to hit!
XD And I'm reminded of the reunion of Caboose and Church via Agent Washingtub.
the only church that ihave been to was turned into an underwear store...
So Church's horn is his sniper rifle, Sarge's legs are his shotgun, Tucker can make his energy sword appear with enough electric current, Simmons is analytical, Grif gets fucked up by almost anything and lives, and Caboose is Caboose. Awesome and Accurate.
453786
Firstly, he has Twilights power, because snipers a fucking strong and he has no accuracy on using it,
Secondly, the humans not using their brains completely is a bullshit myth, the only reason you cant use ur entire brain is because your brain needs to run your body, you can use your entire brain already, simply not on concious acts. If you used it all on concious actions, your heart would stop beating, and that wouldn't go well on the ol' think tank
735963 Well, sort of, the other thing is that if you were to have conscious access to your entire brain, you would over-work it, generally causing yourself to have seizures... a lot of seizures. Therefore your brain regulates how much it is or is not working so that, y'know, you don't kill yourself by mistake.
Theoretically, of course.
Also, the parts you do have conscious access to, you only have 11-13% (slightly varying by person).
(I'm kind of a psychotherapist, so if you wish to argue with me, I'd advise not doing so.)
must. stop. reading. about. colorful ponies!!!!
And Einstein supposedly had 14% access.
So... Church is a OP unicorn AND a OP super soldier... What could possibly go wrong?
Haha! Even now Church can't aim for shit.
Ha! Thats clever! The magic is his sniper, he can hit anything, except for what he is aiming at!
I KNEW he was a terrible shot!
LMFAO HE CAN"T AIM!! HAHA, thats fuckin priceless
Lol church's sniper is his magic, he misses everything he aims at!
Church kept his mind on the paper as he turned around. There were dozens of things in the air. Chairs, clothes, drawers, and everything else behind him was surrounded by a light blue glow.
The second i read the sentence...
I was like
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/105/262/i%20see%20what%20you%20did%20there%202.png
then I FACEPALMED 4TIMES
now im grinning like a moron in my chair
um guys what about the hydra im still wondering about that
I don't know Church very well but I think this is the first time he has been impatient.
Maybe if he aimed in the opposite direction (his own base) he might hit something....
4059576 Remember how he trick shot the meta?
Hey! Atleast we know his aim hasn't changed! This will make for some awesome sniper shots!
Oh.
Just like him using his sniper: hits everything except his target.
4748277 What season was that?
6147000 Now all that needs to happen is for Caboose to get his assault rifle
7283879 I think it would have been funny if caboose had his assault rifle with freckles in it
7831744 This fic started around the finale of season 9. Freckles is probably being assembled right now.
Twilight: Hit the target Church
Church: hits celestia's cake
Twilight: Oh fuck
this is most likely accurate