1. Member Since 1st Feb, 2012
  2. offline for 5h, 5m

Honey Mead


The weight of a pun is all in the wait. For the poundage cannot be measured in pounds (nor dollars), but only in the volume and the volumes of the groans it produces.


Currently Editing

  • Lunar Rising SG-1 explores a world filled with odd aliens on the eve of one of their largest holidays. by azore24 36,176 words · 7,480 views · 722 likes · 18 dislikes
  • Velvet Sparkle and the Queen in Stone Myths and Birthrights side-story: Velvet Sparkle recounts her younger years in a nation north of Equestria and the events leading up to her becoming the mother of Shining Amour and Twilight Sparkle by Tundara 95,720 words · 2,423 views · 229 likes · 5 dislikes
  • Myths and Birthrights Twilight has to deal with new powers and troubles as an Alicorn. by Tundara 137,079 words · 11,750 views · 1,606 likes · 50 dislikes

Finished Editing

  • The Sisters Doo Daring pays a visit to her sister in Ponyville. Due to buried grudges, things get out of hoof. by Ponky 116,988 words · 15,679 views · 1,886 likes · 33 dislikes
  • The Longest Night On the first night of Luna's banishment Celestia finds two alicorns in a crater. by Tundara 6,218 words · 18,486 views · 1,837 likes · 28 dislikes
  • The Apple and the Fox Apple Bloom undergoes her final trial to become a shaman; capturing a spirit on her own. by Tundara 4,417 words · 1,419 views · 156 likes · 6 dislikes
  • A Dream of Pride and Envy The hidden history of the events leading up to the Long Winter is uncovered. A Myths and Birthrights story. by Tundara 27,662 words · 745 views · 111 likes · 5 dislikes
  • Forged in Tartarus Imprisoned in Tartarus, Tirek receives a valuable lesson in the importance of friendship from a most unexpected visitor. Friendship lessons are always a good thing… aren't they? by The Ponytrician 2,480 words · 320 views · 39 likes · 0 dislikes

Watching the watchers watch the watched

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The Greatest Works of Count Honigwein von Beinehaus the Third

  • A Morning Ritual Having a morning ritual allows a pony to prepare for the coming day with a minimum of thought, thus freeing their minds to contemplate everything from the past to the future... for some this is less then ideal. by Honey Mead 3,292 words · 1,343 views · 85 likes · 6 dislikes
  • Twilight Sparkle Does Not Like Bees Celestia has an important lesson for Twilight that puts her in an uncomfortable place. by Honey Mead 2,595 words · 1,330 views · 137 likes · 8 dislikes
  • Erebus: Episode 1: Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! The Sun and Moon no longer shine over the alabaster walls of Canterlot. A darkness long forgotten has begun to seep through the cracks and erode the morality of those it touches. But at the edge of the light there is shadow, holding back the darkness by Honey Mead 15,964 words · 420 views · 21 likes · 2 dislikes
  • The Castle Canterlot After almost two decades working under Princess Celestia, Chronicle has... acclimated to his position as her seneschal. Unfortunately, things are about to change more in one night than they have for the past thousand years. by Honey Mead 28,835 words · 535 views · 73 likes · 2 dislikes
  • Adventures in Homeownership with Sunny Skies and Dusky Sparks Twilight and Celestia decide to take a break from ruling Equestria to live for a few decades as average everyday ponies. by Honey Mead 8,321 words · 1,879 views · 408 likes · 15 dislikes

The Complete Works of Count Honigwein von Bienehaus the Third

  • E The Rise of Lady Potts

    Civil war? Not on Celestia's watch.  · Honey Mead
    1,996 words · 315 views  ·  53  ·  1
  • T Adventures in Homeownership with Sunny Skies and Dusky Sparks

    Twilight and Celestia decide to take a break from ruling Equestria to live for a few decades as average everyday ponies.  · Honey Mead
    8,321 words · 1,879 views  ·  408  ·  15 · sex
  • T The Castle Canterlot

    After almost two decades working under Princess Celestia, Chronicle has... acclimated to his position as her seneschal. Unfortunately, things are about to change more in one night than they have for the past thousand years.  · Honey Mead
    28,835 words · 535 views  ·  73  ·  2
  • E Luna's Last Moments

    Luna counts down the seconds to the end of her life.  · Honey Mead
    1,220 words · 246 views  ·  14  ·  1
  • T The Life and Times of Fancy and Fleur

    Random short stories that revolve around Fancypants and Fleur de Lis.  · Honey Mead
    2,786 words · 319 views  ·  25  ·  0
  • T I was an Enclave Officer

    The Enclave is founded on Loyalty, but some Loyalties are stronger than others.  · Honey Mead
    1,310 words · 363 views  ·  23  ·  4
  • E Twilight Sparkle Does Not Like Bees

    Celestia has an important lesson for Twilight that puts her in an uncomfortable place.  · Honey Mead
    2,595 words · 1,330 views  ·  137  ·  8
  • E A Morning Ritual

    Having a morning ritual allows a pony to prepare for the coming day with a minimum of thought, thus freeing their minds to contemplate everything from the past to the future... for some this is less then ideal.  · Honey Mead
    3,292 words · 1,343 views  ·  85  ·  6
  • T Erebus: Episode 1: Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

    The Sun and Moon no longer shine over the alabaster walls of Canterlot. A darkness long forgotten has begun to seep through the cracks and erode the morality of those it touches. But at the edge of the light there is shadow, holding back the darkness  · Honey Mead
    15,964 words · 420 views  ·  21  ·  2
  • T Alicorns, an Orangutan, and L-Space

    What happens when Twilight finds an Orangutan in her Library and what happened to the Princesses?  · Honey Mead
    8,658 words · 1,209 views  ·  23  ·  4
  • T A Time for Memories

    Memories. Flashes of the Past. Moments in time so profound that they are etched into our minds.  · Honey Mead
    2,554 words · 604 views  ·  13  ·  0
  • T Chronicle

    An old pony recounts his life as the personal secretary for Princess Celestia.  · Honey Mead
    48,435 words · 905 views  ·  44  ·  1 · sex

Bee Jokes

"Why do bees always have sticky hair?"

--"Because they use honeycombs."

"Why did the bee get married?"

--"Because he found his honey."

Why did the queen walk home from the bar?

--Because she was afraid of flying buzzed.

Insect joke: A termite walks into a bar and asks "Is the bar tender here?" (Super Trampoline)

(Feel free to submit your own.)

Mar
12th
2015

Terry Prachett · 7:08pm

I don't know any quotes to give you. I don't have any stories to share. All I have is the joy and laughter you gave away and the hours I lost on your flat world swiming through space with four elephants and a giant turtle that made far more sense than this one.

Honey Mead · 29 views · Report
  • Viewing 74 - 78 of 78
#78 · 4w, 5d ago · · ·

Insect joke: A termite walks into a bar and asks "Is the bar tender here?" (Super Trampoline)

I see I have graced your page with my presence before. :rainbowwild:

#77 · 5w, 1d ago · · ·

Thanks for the fav on The Old Gray Mare! :twilightsmile:

#76 · 14w, 6d ago · · ·

Thanks for the fav on A Spoonful of Sugar!

#75 · 15w, 4d ago · · ·

:D :D Thanks for the favorite!

#74 · 19w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1563402

It was clever... Even though the songs didn't translate well.

  • Viewing 74 - 78 of 78
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