Hello everybody!

Earlier this morning the highly esteemed DRWolf gave Constants the honour of a very beautiful and professional dramatic reading over on his YouTube channel. You can find it right here.

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I already made reference to Google Translate's hilarious tendency to brutally chop up sentences, but recently I found out that Awful Lot of Coffee was translated to Chinese by this person here. I am honored that anyone would feel my nonsense is worth the effort of translating, and I would like to extend my full

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One day I aim to be as poetic as this.

It was smack time.

Also I find it oddly shattering how "I love you, I miss you" remained completely unchanged. I guess no matter what language you speak, those sentiments make sense.

I got curious and put a portion of an upcoming chapter of SBS through four layers of Google Translate and here's the result:

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Y'know what I like?

Well, besides tea?

Music.

You know what music is?

Writing fuel.

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[2016-03-01, 5:10:28 PM] Kestrel: Have any of you ever hit the random button in pony creator?
[2016-03-01, 5:10:37 PM] Kestrel: It's nightmarish.

What have I become?

My sweetest friend...

...Everyone I know...

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Alright, fine...

You monsters.

I'll keep writing it.

....

But only because I like AU Twilight and Celestia's chemistry. And thought of a bunch of ideas involving them.

So now it's incomplete, and it has a Twilight Sparkle tag.

Can't promise it's gonna be entirely what you people are expecting though.

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­

Well, here's a depressing issue. Wow. Can't believe I'm doing this. Today I'm recommending stories that are dead. Or likely dead. Implicitly dead.

Why? Cause I want you all to share in my pain, that's why. I'm evil. Rawr.

Since I Was Small by FifthAlicorn
Last Updated:2nd Feb 2015

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...And freaking smug-ass Princess Celestia nearly killed me. This episode should have a language warning cause if that face doesn't just scream "F**k your shit" then I earnestly don't know what does.

Luna and Cadence give a metric-total of zero hoots, too:

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Hey look. Roman numerals. Aren't I pretentious.

Whatever. Here’s some story recommendations.

(For the record, the first review was actually written when the story was still in the "New Stories" box, but I'll be holding off publishing it until I have a few other stories I wanna recommend. So if it's gotten more popular over the ensuing weeks… then… who cares, exactly. Get off my case.)

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Definite Dark tag on this one, and a Drama tag, too. You can probably guess roughly what it's gonna be about already.

EDIT: And it's up! Hope you guys like this one!

(I just can't stop writing Celestia, I guess.)