I saw a few mistakes, but other than that it's a good story so far. Keep it up!

I see a lot of grammatical mistakes man, i like the story so far but the grammar is what's killing it for me.

3269339 Sorry about the grammar its not my strong points...but I'm glad you like it. If you would be so kind to point out some the mistakes so I could not make them for future chapters.

So, yes, I seem to enjoy it so far. Being this WH40k fan, I love this militaristic atmospehre and futuristic weapons and plot. Really hits my preferences.

I noticed some grammar mistakes, but they are nothing a good proofreader can't fix. Now, to the writing.
You give a lot of details about how the enviroment looks, and that is good. You also don't take too much time describing it - that is also good. What I didn't really enjoy was this sense of something missing. So far, we haven't got a mention of a single pony, except Celestia in the beggining, but I am sure it will change later, so I am not taking it into account for now. Since the fic's still incomplete, I wish you good luck, and prepare for the full review when you finally accomplish your fic. Keep up the good work.

I don't want to sound like a broken record, because others told you about this arleady, but I say it anyway - some details about this universe you created (or took from some tv show or game, whatever) would be greatly appreciated. For now, you are cursed to have my upvote.

3271885 Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!