Anymore flames will be subject to blocking. Nice comments only

2810764 Oh boy, we're in for a ride.

2810764

LOL
YOU ARE SO MAD, BRAH. YOU SEETH WITH UTTER RAGE. Y U SO MAD!?!

2810764
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24796793.jpg

By blocking a man and deleting his comments, you don't prove him a liar. Instead, you prove to the world that you fear what he has to say.

Not enough deleted comments, bro.

2810764 ... I can't believe you call yourself a Prince.

2284561 Just to be fair, my O.C isn't an alicorn without enough description to set up his character. Yeah I'm not going to claim this story to be good by any means, but at least accept that maybe most of us kinda know what we are talking about.

Yea, because this story is amazing, what the fuck do these idiots know? You're a bastion of literary art! You're...

*zap*

...Sorry, my bullshit emitter overloaded.

2812143 *Slow Clap*

2811661 Ok

2811636 Hmm?

2811608 Huh?

2811595 No I just block haters. Nice to meet you by the way

2811543 Haha that's actually funny

2811510 I'm not mad. just bored

2811504 I may look like a pony but I don't give rides

2815727

>says is not mad
>deletes all comments he deems "hateful" (A.K.A. they aren't kissing his ass)
>blocks the guy he is replying to
lol you must be new here

2815735 Hmm well Iv'e only been here a few months. Nad I delet and block those that annoy me

2815743

So you ARE mad. Good to know. That means my work here is done.

2815747 Not mad actually *Shrugs*

2815750

And yet you blocked people who've actually made good criticism on the story. Just cuz they weren't kissing yer ass. Kthen

2815755 Didn't actually block, just deleted. I'm not going to delete any future advice. Only those who annoy me ^^

2815720 Lemme go ahead and direct you to what a riff is.

Click the link in the blog post

Basically it's just us taking stories and having a story within a story where we point out mistakes and have a little fun at the stories expense.

We haven't riffed this yet I don't think, but don't worry it will let you know exactly what is wrong with it by simply being a story. As for this let me lay out a few things to be a little helpful because I'm not sure if you understand why your fics are doing well... poorly. I mean the red bar on your like dislike ratio is just scary. I've only seen one other story with that many dislikes.

Basically the biggest challenge in this story s the fact I'm not sure what is driving the plot. What makes me want to root for your character as a reader? Where are the details giving him connect-ability? I as a reader am not going to strive to connect to a character, it is your job as a writer to do that by giving him depth. Right now he is shallow an in need of a major overhaul or at least some description. Perhaps one of the most annoying things that is blatantly staring me in the face is the fact he is an alicorn. I'm not sure but last time I checked there are only four alicorns known to exist, and even to begin to turn into one you must go through years of studying under Celestia herself as she seems to be the only one to grant ponies the ability to be one. So, you are breaking canon just by that character existing. That and the color scheme of black anything on a pony O.C is so overused and very typical to find in most anyone's O.C. Try to keep black strictly to mane and tail color.

As for the story, it's kind of hard to follow. I'm not sure what I am supposed to be reading at times, as there are so many sentences that need rewording. I imagine you are having trouble getting the image in your head onto "paper" clearly. The best way to do that, is to look at something like an object and write out every possible thing that it has. Go from small like lets say a pencil, to describing an entire room or building. Now once you feel pretty good about how you are describing things, come back to your stories. It's about placement of objects and placement of important things. I'm not saying this will work, it helps though. Being objective with what you are staring at tends to lend yourself to better scenery in a story, which really puts the reader 'right' there in the action which tends to make connecting with a character fairly easy for the reader then.

I hate saying it, but the plot can be as typical as all get out, but if you throw enough detailing of actions and scenery, anything can go from being shitty to being a masterpiece. This however is lacking so much, and it jumps around so badly that I have a problem keeping those scenes in my head. As for the rest of it, it really doesn't matter. I mean yeah you could use some touching up here and there by making your sentences a little more fluid, and yeah the plot could be better, but hell if you are showing an actual interest in writing, why the hell would you put something like these stories out? I mean unless you don't know what makes a story good.

Either way my best recommendation is to just try again with another story. If you feel it necessary to finish these, then I guess go ahead, but please for the love of writing, start showing some improvement. This just cannot be the best you have.

Anyways, I hope you take some of my advice and use it, I'm not going to leave on a rotten note, as being a dick is frowned upon (and it's much harder to get away with it now), but just try and keep these things in mind and you should do much better in your ratings at least.

Final Verdict: Just another black alicorn O.C fic that didn't prove any of the stereotypes wrong yet.

2815831 Thanks for the friendly advice ^^

2815863 No problem man, i really hope all of that rant/comment was helpful in some sort of way. I'm usually a bastard asshole who rips authors like you a new one, I'm just too calm to actually do that now.

2815867 But I won't change Comet. Iv'e had him for three years and he's somepony I RP as on chatango

2815904 Never said you had to man. He may just not be the best pony to write about man. Trust me, sometimes it easier to create a new character, than to try and salvage another. You can use him on whatever else you want. Hell my Original character was an alicorn that controlled time and seasons, and had I known any better I would not have written a story about him. Instead he transformed into Orange Swirl. A pot smoking earth pony who has no idea what he wants to be in his life. Just try writing another character for your stories man. Trust me that would make for a better character. (Also don't listen to the self insert haters, I have two self inserts, and both have fared pretty well). Just remember that a story comes down to three things character, detail, and plot. Worry about everything else later on.

I've seen WAY worse.

2815989 Haha Thanks

2815989 Like a mirror? Or did that break?

2816242 Haha nice one!

Let's just add Princecometrider to the exception list...

2816267 Huh?

2816279 Oh, it's a list of authors I won't consider hating on, no matter how bad they've done. In short: People I don't take seriously.

2816401 Ummmm ok

2816242
Well damn! Looks like Art made a funny.

2817497 And you walked right into it

2810764

Anymore flames will be subject to blocking. Nice comments only

Dude, learn to take some criticism. People are not gonna flame your stories cuz they wanna be like, "IM GUNNA FLAME THIS STORY CUZ I WANNA BE MEAN AND ANNOYING LOLZ" You can either keep being ignorant, or actually consider what mistakes people are pointing out and try to make an effort to make your stories better by listening to those complaints.