• Member Since 17th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Dec 24th, 2019

DemonRykuKyuubi


T

Applejack has been in love with a certain pink mare with a puffy mane for quite a while now. Yes, She and Pinkie were inseparable. If you were to see Applejack, chances are that Pinkie was somewhere nearby. But something isn't right. Recently, Applejack has noticed some odd behavior from her pink lover. Distant gazes and unhappy faces when Pinkie thought that AJ wasn't looking have begun to make the southern mare ask questions. What is it that Pinkie Pie won't tell her?

This is my first attempt at a shipping story, as well as a sad fiction, so please do leave comments! This story may not update frequently, but if I can, I will try to at least get a chapter out here and there. I hope you enjoy it!

Cover art by teiptr
All other pictures owned by their respective artists/Hasbro. I take credit only for the written story, not the images or the characters.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 24 )

Wonderful detailing and great use of pics!:ajsmug::pinkiehappy:

Also, FIRST COMMENT

Wow, the Apples are a lot more progressive than I thought. Not only are they are ok with a same sex relationship, they even show slightly provocative pics to Applebloom!

I felt the story moved a little fast, and the old, "spy on your lover and catch them being kissed and run away before they can explain" is a bit cliche. But your use of pictures was excellent. Don't forget to credit the artists!

Overall I give it 3/5 mustaches.:moustache::moustache::moustache:

Feature box. Story containing pictures. I don't see how. :facehoof:

1943887 You're just mad you didn't think of it first.

Wait... I can like comments now?

1943224 LIKE FOR YOU!

1943036 LIKE FOR YOU!

LIKES FOR EVERYPONY!

1943887 ...except for you.

why must these applepie fics always end up so freakin sad?:applecry: I feel your pain Applejack damn it pinkie dont be such a cheat!:fluttershyouch: I would like to see more i hope Pinkie comes to her senses and realize she doesn't belong with Dash damn it pinkie :raritycry:

I'd have to say a few things:
I really like the fact that you use a different medium, AJ's photo album, for AJ to develop the story. One thing I will say in that respect is that would she really write out her accent?

If you really want to polish this, you could take a "fine-toothed comb" to this and get those small errors in grammar and the like. Also, changing the color to the photo album would be helpful to establish what is being said and what is written. But, nice job. I patiently wait for more :twilightsmile:

1943972

I always knew you were the crazy one.

1944462 Well, I'd HOPE so, cause otherwise, you'd be wrong.

1944476
True things happen for a reason. as much as i love pinkiedash i just hate seeing applejack get hurt maybe Fluttershy will come in to cheer her up. who knows i just want see where this goes.

1944272

I'm so annoyed that I didn't see this...

But you make a good point!

1944470

Casual hello.

1944476

And to you, too.

------------------------

Anyhow! Nice work, Ry! Hoping that chapter 2 is happier! Because I'm a wuss! Don't laugh at me!

1944476 Yeah. Sometimes things happen. And sometimes innocent ponies get hurt because of it.

1944272 Well, it's from AJ's perspective, maybe it's meant to be less, what's written and more of, how she's reading it.

Whenever I see this pair, I always hope (even in vain!) that everything turns out well in the end for them. I mean, they go together like applepie.

:ajsmug:

1944563

No problem! I hope it helped.

1944612

That's very true and could be the case, but as I was reading that's how I interpreted it, so either way :twilightblush:

It was very late when I finally fell asleep.

Ohh.. this looks good...

The call of my aching limbs and tired mind finally overwhelmed my sadness, and I fell asleep right there, in front of the fireplace.

th09.deviantart.net/fs71/200H/f/2013/019/0/a/discord_is_my_friend_by_johnjoseco-d5s08v3.jpg

END OF CHAPTER 1.

.... Wait, what?

GREAT! story, the only thing down is the ending. The one where I said

.... Wait, what?

That was the let down. But cant wait for more.

This reminds me of so. Many memories i wish i could forget.

3087469 I know that feeling all too well, my friend.

Gods damn, talk about filling to the brim with emotions, it's rare to see Pinkie cheat on a pony, shit...this has my full attention, wow. Maybe could have given more detail about what brought them together and give Pinkie her own point of view, Gods damn, this is tragic but realistic, and I love this story and you for that, keep it up, I'll be waiting for more:pinkiehappy:

This is good, so you should start it up again :raritywink:

Login or register to comment