Hearth's Warming isn't always cozy. As Lyra waits in Canterlot after stupidly missing her train, she must prove to a certain dark blue princess that she really does love another mare.
Chapters (2)
Iam Atrie
Joined 13th Sep, 2012 ·
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Thank you to FallenZephyr for letting me use his pic, and to the mods, who seem to never quit, even during the christmas season
Pretty good. You have some issues with sentence fluency, mostly to do with comma placement. But pretty good. Have my like.
1847716
Did you notice it throughout the whole story, or just near the end? I've been a tad tired, so that might have to do with something
1847728 I picked some near the beginning, and then one or two at the end. They were somewhat rare and didn't present too much of a problem.
You should pleeaase update this more
1994568 Got about 500 words today of the planned ~2500. This will probably be the last chapter, but I'm not positive yet. Expect an update in a few days, and thanks for the motivation
I love the idea of the story and the writing style but there were a few mistakes like almost etc. Practically put. PLEASE CONTINUE THIS STIRY AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! !!!!
2000851 Shit. Ignore that if you saw it. I write stupid, rude things when I'm really tired.
Anyways, what mistakes did you see? And I hate to say this, but I won't be able to write that much over the next few days - we have to get a bunch of stuff out of storage and put it into our new house. Sorry, and thanks for the watch and favourite!
On the off-chance you didn't see it, it was me asking you to look at another one of my stories
Mostlu just commas but I'm pretty bad at that myseld