Elements of Harmony- the users manual

by Hope

1. The list

“Paper.”

This is always how it starts, she calls for a supply roll call, and before we know it, the tree is on fire.

“Check.”

I wonder if she even sees the signs when she is slipping into an obsessive frenzy?

“Quills.”

Or maybe she sees them but can’t stop herself, I wonder if she needs help?

“Check.”

I should really read over ‘Psychological Problems for the Pragmatist’ sometime.

“Ink.”

Or maybe I could compile a list of books that could help her and go through them all, ranked by applicability.

“Check.”

Great, now I am thinking like her.

“Okay Spike, take a letter please.”

Oh, that I didn’t expect. Normally it’s progressed to a list or a schedule by the time her mane is this frizzy, must be a touchy subject for her to get so worked up over.

“Dear princess Celestia.”

Yup, called it.

“I am writing to tell you of a wonderful lesson on friendship I learned today.”

Okay.... She didn’t do anything today, not even her morning chores.

“I learned how important it is to trust that your friends will understand your reasoning, instead of worrying for hours and hours on end.... Actually spike, take away the repeat, I don’t want to sound too desperate.”

As usual, I transcribe everything she says, not editing it at all. I can always use being a ‘baby dragon’ as an excuse. Celestia needs to know how panicked Twilight is.

“With this new lesson in mind, I would like to request the use of the Elements of harmony, to further my study of the magic of friendship.”

Oh, here we go.

“I understand that you may be apprehensive to allow me to run tests on them, but I assure you I will take the utmost diligence in their safekeeping and proper use.”

Oh boy, lying to the princess already? Proper use does not sound like Twilight Sparkle.

“This would be in the pursuit of the knowledge required to construct a Users Manual for future bearers of the elements to refer to.”

As if they require one. Put necklace on, feel happy, blast evil. Is there really anything beyond that? I am sure I will be writing a list answering that question later.

“Thank you for your assistance and understanding, your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.”

I sigh and look to her for approval before breathing a plume of green flame across the note, and watching as it vanishes in a cloud of ash.

“Why do you want to write a User’s manual anyway?” I ask incredulously.

“Spike, the Elements of Harmony are the most powerful artifacts in all of Equestria.” She says pointedly.

I stare blankly at her. “And?”

“And we have no idea how they work!” She cries out. “What if it comes down to a moment of crisis, all the world is hanging in the balance, but since we don’t know how the elements work, we FAIL?” She whispers the last bit, hooves held in front of her mouth in terror and eyes as wide as plates.

I wonder if she has slept in the last 48 hours.

“Now, I am going to need you to write up a list for me, of things that we are going to test.” Twilight tells me, suddenly grinning widely as she trots to her desk and grabs a brush in her magic to attempt a futile attack on her mane.

“We don’t know what Celestia is going to say though...” I remind her nervously.

I don’t like redoing work, I really don’t like doing work that ends up being useless.

“I’m sure it will be fine.” She says, as one eye twitches dangerously, and the brush dangles from a collection of knots.

“Okay... So, list title?” I ask, deciding that work is the lesser of two evils.

“Element Examination,” she says with a grin.

I wonder if there is a disease passed from writer to writer that forces them to alliterate when titling anything.

“Item one. Power output.” Twilight says, finally getting through a bunch of knots in her mane and working it towards its normal shape.

“How do you test magical output?” I ask curiously.

“We won’t finish this list if you ask questions, but I prefer using light and heat output to measure a spell’s power. The more light and heat are produced, the more powerful it is.”

I ponder the giant glowing rainbow of concentrated friendship that I had seen first hand. “Uh huh.”

“Item two. Power draw. Item...”

“How do you draw power?” I interrupt.

She glares at me but then sighs and shrugs. She likes explaining her ideas and she knows it.

“Not drawing like a picture, it means how much power it uses.”

“But you six didn’t seem tired at all after using the elements.” I point out.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” She spins on me frantically. “What if the Elements of Harmony are sucking our life force out of us to fuel the beams, and we would never even know it!” She says dramatically, face an inch from mine.

“Ehehehe.... yeah.” I say as I write it down. “Next?”

“Item three. Usage parameters.”

I wasn’t going to ask what she meant by this after her last outburst, but she continued undeterred by my lack of interest.

“I mean, what if the Elements don’t work in cold weather?” Twilight gasps. “All of Equestria could be doomed by a simple lack of knowledge!”

I just nod with a nervous smile, hoping that this isn’t a day that I have to fill out a “Replacement windows” form.

“Item four!” She is really getting into this. “Target requirements! What if they don’t work on beings who are covered in tin foil?! We have to make sure our weapon cannot be neutralized!”

I get a disturbing image of Twilight holding the Element of Magic like a sword, smacking her enemies with it.

Good thing “ignorance” and “not enough time in the day” aren’t ponies, or they would be in serious danger.

“Item five....” She thinks for a moment. “Ah, it was Wielder requirements.”

“It only works for you six.” I point out, raising an eyebrow.

“But what if we have an argument? If all of Equestria hangs in the balance, and we can all be doomed by a simple quarrel or tiff or misunderstanding... We need to know, Spike!”

“Of course.” I deadpan, writing it out.

“Lastly, Element properties.” She says victoriously. I don’t bother asking, out of fear. She doesn’t explain, probably because she thinks it’s that obvious.

I personally wonder what exactly Twilight plans to do in order to test all of these, but it is not my problem. Not yet, at least.

That is future Spike’s problem.

We post the new list on the current project board in the throne room before saying goodnight to the guards and heading up to bed.

Author's Note:

Element Examination

1. Power output
2. Power Draw
3. Usage parameters
4. Target requirements
5. Wielder requirements
6. Element properties

Comments

[Pixels]

media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc24wnIhhJ1r3zat8.gif

[Blacklight]

Interesting idea. The first chapter caught me. I'll give this one a read as it goes.

[Church]

Heheh, I love how this is written from Spike's perspective. I was not expecting that in the slightest, and it's a brilliant idea. Spike's inner thoughts are great, and I hope that the rest of the series is like this as well. Overall, it was good from start to finish.

"Twilight tells me, suddenly happy as she trots to her desk and floating up a brush to attempt a futile attack on her mane." I would rephrase this sentence. Especially "floating up a brush".

Otherwise, this tale flowed well and I'm curious to find out more. Neat idea!

[Duplex Fields]

Considering her unscientific tests and wild theories in Feeling Pinkie Keen, I get the sense she's more of an engineer than a scientist. This will be fun.

[Mr Stargazer]

[Themaskedferret]

I'm game, let's see what happens.