In the midst of her usual agenda, Fluttershy finds herself in an alien world following a run-in with the Infinite Improbability Drive. The challenges and complications of such a traumatic deposition ensue, and Fluttershy is forced to carve out a life in a whole new world and to make friends despite her introverted tendencies, culminating in a titanic encounter with her grandest fear. All in all, an adventure inspired but not reliant on the masterworks of Douglas Adams where the greatest of the mane six must battle with her only weakness: weakness.
Here it is: Across the Universe, a name inspired by the nature of the story and Douglas Adams's affinity for the Beatles.
Final note: it includes tracts lovingly pulled from Douglas Adams's book The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which I chose not to cite but am wholeheartedly mentioning here. If it is a problem, I can cite page numbers without a problem, although it does break up the story a bit. All but two little bits are italicized, and the couple that aren't are the bit about the gold brick and a lemon as well as the nothingth's bit, but those are otherwise insignificant passages of metaphor and imagined reality, respectively.
If anyone who reads it has even the slightest thing to say about the story in the form of plot-feedback, character-developmental feedback, and grammatical feedback (though I tried to excise a lot of that) as well as parts that I overlooked that should have the html-stuff I had to ad-lib in after spending so much time italicizing in word or I somehow never tabbed-in (another formatting complication), then give it. No matter what, I will heed the feedback because it's the only reason why I submitted this without any prior party so much as glimpsing this story. I'd heartily appreciate any contribution to the improvement of the work.
It goes without saying that your vocabulary is something to admire. I really do enjoy your word choice and cannot wait to delve into this story some more.
It's hard to come by a fan fiction nowadays, mlp related or otherwise, that has an author who understands basic setting and developmental creativity. I think this most certainly deserves more attention than it is currently getting.
That being said however, it does seem like our ideas of "chapters" are different in terms of length, or rather, word count. I understand sometimes it can feel daunting, but I think it's a good choice to make such a well written and wordy fic into small sections. Gives the rest of us some new words to take the time and learn.
Ah ha, and so the cross-over begins. Again, I have to compliment your style in keeping up accurate references, as well as word choice. You clearly are not done revising this quite yet, but are certainly on the right track to having something here, for those who have read the Hichhiker's Guide to the Galaxy at least.
Oh, and, "...Shook by a speare..." was clever.
At long last! Dialog!
The narration was doing quite well but felt a bit.... prolonged as though searching for the right time to introduce a change in setting. But only just long enough to not be quite so cumbersome. I am still enjoying these, as you have a unique way of making each situation and conflict last only long enough before the appropriate shift in the plot.
As I said before, I still find it incredibly refreshing to find a fan fiction author who understands literature enough to make an engrossing piece of wordy eye-candy.
Although some parts here felt a tad rushed, you obviously get what your doing with your work here. I figure when the tiny bits are trimmed up a bit and the little things are skimmed through, this has a strong chance of becoming a recommended cross-over.