Princess Luna's Diary
Dear Diary,
Today, 'Tia agreed to spend more time with me, and all it took was me promising to learn the spell to fix our problem! Once I'm done with that, we'll spend so much time together! I'm looking forward to it. 'Tia says she'll teach me about all the things I missed while on the moon. Did you know there is a machine that can make toast? I didn't! I remember when we needed to hold bread over a fire to make toast! Oops, I'm rambling...
The spell shouldn't be too hard to learn. It's only an advanced level spell. One that only two other ponies could ever perform, them being Starswirl the Bearded and Twilight Sparkle... Only the two most magically gifted ponies to ever walk the face of Equestria...
Oh, who am I kidding? I can't learn this spell, it is too difficult! I don't have the heart to tell 'Tia, so I suppose I will just have to try my best, and hope she isn't mad at me. Maybe I can find another pony who can perform the spell?
Oh, I'll be right back. Somepony is knocking on my door.
I'm back, and in much lower moods. I opened the door to find that a messenger pony was on the other side, holding a big basket of fruit tied up with a ribbon. There was a note in it, and upon reading the note, my spirits was squashed like an insect on the underside of a pony's hoof. It was from Twilight Sparkle and her friends. I will not relate the entire note to you, but in short, it said that they, and everypony in Equestria, are counting on me. I feel like I could just lock my door and cry for days, I'm so overwhelmed.
---
Dear Diary,
It's been another day since the incident, and nopony seems to have noticed that the sun is staying still in the sky. Are the ponies of Equestria really so unobservant? If it were the moon in the sky, they would notice in a heartbeat. They'd probably form a mob outside the castle, waving around pitchforks and torches. Have I mentioned that actually happened to me once? But that's a story for another time.
I've made no headway learning the spell, but my spirits have risen somewhat, as I may have found a mare who will be capable of performing the spell. Well, I haven't found her yet, but I've learned of her. Her name is The Great and Powerful Trixie, and if she's telling the truth, then she is just the wizard we need! Her ad in the newspaper claims that she has vanquished the dreaded Ursa Major! Somepony with that skill must be able to perform the necessary spell!
Oh, I can hear 'Tia calling for me now. I'll write some more in you tomorrow, Diary.
---
Dear Diary,
I have made no headway in learning the spell, yet have made plenty of headway in locating the Great and Powerful Trixie! She was last sighted travelling from Manehattan to Trottingham. This was a day ago, she must still be on the road! I have sent a few night guards to locate her and deliver a message.
I have discovered a new food today, one that was invented during my absence. It's called pizza, and it is wonderful!...
*The rest of the excerpt is the day to day ramblings of the princess.*
---
Trixie's Diary
Dear Diary,
Today has been very good to Trixie! You will not believe what happened today! After performing her most successful magic act ever, Trixie was stopped on the road by a Royal Guard! Trixie knows what you are thinking, and no, she did not get arrested. The Guard was bearing a message from none other than Princess Luna! Obviously, the princesses realize Trixie's talents as a magician! Let Trixie tell you, being the most powerful pony in all off Equestria is much more difficult now that everypony is an Alicorn.
The letter stated that the Princess wants Trixie to travel to Canterlot at once to help her with an urgent assignment! Trixie is excited to get started! There is no wonder as to why the princess chose me, as Trixie is the most talented pony in all of the kingdom! Perhaps the princess shall make Trixie royal magician! Is that a thing, royal magician...?
No matter, Trixie is so powerful, they will make the role just for her to fill it!
Well...........we're all screwed.
I don't like Trixie, and I don't think Twilight could beat an alicorn at magic. Thanks for the update!
Woooo just passed 300 faves!
Okay, apparently, it did that yesterday, but meh. I posted late.
Then everyone was an Alicorn.
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1703731
Stinging Trees are a very, very, very nasty form of native plant life. It's not actually one species, but rather a whole genus. All shrubs and trees of this genus have very fine hairs which will end up in your body if you walk too close (also, said hairs SHED, so too close is anywhere within a 5m radius from the farthest out branch). These stingers are poisonous, and they have been known to kill dogs, people, and (this is important) fully grown horses. With great efficiency. Even if it doesn't kill you, the hairs - and subsequently the pain, because it's the Stinging Tree for a reason, tends to last several years; the hairs are too fine to remove, and they don't break down in your body.
All kinds of fun.
1703920
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
i3.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/006/137/130856000524.gif
Oh lordy.
We're counting on Trixie to save us.
1703941 Hey, he asked!
1703965
WE NEED TO BURN AUSTRALIA.
IT'S THE ONLY WAY.
I'M SORRY, BUT THE SACRIFICE WILL BE WORTH IT.
GETTING RID OF THESE MONSTROSITIES.
1704031
Oh, you thought destroying Australia would get rid of the stinging tree? That's too bad, because it's also found in India, Indonesia, and The Maluka Islands.
There is no escape. Poor ponies, thinking the Everfree forest is a hostile environment. They don't even know the meaning of the word!
1704057
There is only one solution.
We evacuate Earth.
Then blow it up with nukes.
Every nuke we have.
1704070
Pfft.
You know, I wonder if there's a fic for that. Ponies in Australia. Not even just modern day Australia. Australia in the Pleistocene, the time when humans first arrived. When the truly large predators were still around.
Pleistocene Australia:
-Carnivorous buzz-saw toothed kangaroos? Check.
-Monitor-lizards the size of a city bus? Check.
-Climbing warm-blooded saw-toothed crocodiles? Check.
-Gigantic killer pseudo-python? Check.
-Marsupial lion with sickle thumbs? Check.
-Gigantic horned turtle built like a panzer tank? Check.
-Carnivorous Flightless Birds with heads larger than those of small horses? Check.
The only reason Australia is as safe as it is, is because humans are the deadliest things to have ever existed, and cleared out large predators by setting them on freaking fire.
Let's put ponies there. Should be fun.
1704132
I WANNA SEE A PONY FIGHT A TERROR BIRD!
1704150
Nope, not a terror bird. The Australia flightless carnivore bird, in proud Australian fashion, is a bit of an oddity. See, it's closest relatives were ducks and geese, rather than any other terror bird. That did not stop it from chasing down and eating people, if that's what you're thinking.
Therefore, it gets a fun little nickname; The Demon Duck of Doom. Yes, scientists actually call it that.
1704174
My point still stands, I wanna see a pony fight a Terror Bird.
1704070 Sorry, it already spread to the colony on Mars.
Oh gawd.
Steamy food is like crack to me.
1704192
Screw planets. We should live on a self-sustaining starship and blow up any planet we see.
Lets hope rhe pizza is without pepperoni
1703671
Depends on which Trixie- season 1 or season 3 who beats Twilight in a duel.
1704222
It's with pepper-oni.
Sliced up bell peppers.
1704186
Best I can do.
1704239 You're my new favourite reader.
1704253
Walking With Beasts was the first thing that came to mind with "Terror Bird" and "Pony". It just took me a while to find the video, because dang, it's actually kind of old.
I was a little kid when I watched predators ruthlessly murder other animals. That sort of thing was so much more interesting to me than cartoons. Do you think it might have had any effect on my psyche?
1704239
1704229 That's IF she beats Twilight.
1704269
Please, when I was a child, and my mom offered to read me a bedtime story, I made her read dinosaur encyclopedias.
1704271
Send me videos of extinct beasts mauling each other and you might earn your position as favourite reader back.
1704274
SPOILER ALERT
She beats Twilight.
1704283
...Yeah, I've done the exact same freaking thing. Until I was old enough to start reading them myself( i.e. six), after which I didn't need anyone reading them for me, thank you very much.
1704304
I still want to be a paleontologist. But instead of studying, I write Ponywordsâ„¢ on the internet.
1704208 Your hydroponics bay has been infested.
1704324
Suicide.
1704321
Every boy wanted to either be a paleontologist or an astronaut at some point while growing up.
Every. Single. One. No exceptions.
1704347
True, true.
I just never grew out of it.
1704336 You fail. *mario failure theme*
1704363
I'd rather do it myself than have the excruciating pain of those damn murdertrees do it for me!
1704355
One day, someone is going to genetically engineer birds back into dinosaurs. Because, as far as science is now concerned, birds are dinosaurs. They just have wings instead of arms, and have beaks instead of teeth. It'll be a small dinosaur, but it's theoretically possible to make one.
I WILL live to see that day.
1704400
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/evolution-stahp.jpg
1704414
Just read the first one down.
1703675
Twilight is the most powerful mortal spellcaster in Equestria. However, there's more than just raw magic to be "good at magic"... even if Luna's a hundred times stronger than Twilight, Twilight could still be a much better magician simply because of her grasp of concepts and ability to work out the minutia of spellcasting.
1704274
She does in the synopsis here- ===Summary from The Hub===
"The 'great and powerful' Trixie returns to Ponyville this time as a force to be reckoned with, and defeats Twilight Sparkle in a magic duel that banishes her from town."
<ref>{{cite web|url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGgjiG411og|title=My Little Pony Friendship is Magic "Magic Duel" (Clip) - The Hub|date=2012-11-28|accessdate=2012-11-28}}</ref>
So, so, Trixie? Bwahahaha! Oh wow...
They're so beyond screwed.
1704070
1704611 O.o totally forgot that.
1704869 That's how I usually spend my days. Braeburn x Flim and Flam (twins! oh glorious day!)
Hooray, Trixie! Let's all eat a pinecone in celebration!
*crunch*
Ouch. Now my mouth is bleeding.
Remember, people: what Trixie doesn't know is that the spell turns the caster into an earth pony! Oh, sure, she'll be rewarded for saving Equestria, maybe even get portrayed in one of those stained glass windows in the palace. However, the reward will mean nothing without her ability to cast spells! Almost makes me feel sorry for her. Almost.
1704509 Yes, but Luna has lived longer and so has had much more experience than Twilight. I just don't believe that Luna isn't as good at magic as Twilight. Besides, she was on the moon for a thousand years, what else was there to do besides play around with magic?
1704947
That applies fridge horror when you think about the fact that they wanted Luna to do it. Are they trying to strip her of her powers?
Or does it not intentionally strip a pony of their skills unless it suffers catastrophic failure?
These comments freak me the fuck out! I see trees that kill people, Pans to nuke areas that said trees are in, carnivorous birds and plots to nuke earth What in the name of pony-hell do these comments all have in common? Answer: Australia.
WTF?!!?
Well. Trixie has the POWER now. Let's see if she can use it.