Vinyl Scratch works at a night club. HER night club, and everyday afterwards, she listens to a mysterious and beautiful sound coming from a balcony. The sound of a cello.
Chapters (1)
Jeta
Joined 15th Jun, 2012 ·
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I know nothing of medecine and very little of psychological disorders. Don't tell me what DPD literally means, Its just the closest thing I could find.
... Seems a bit rushed. Though, the concept of the story is great.
1569316
This is what google is for ;)
And Vinyl and Tavi? Insta fave!
1572179
Go away.
Anyway, this is certainly interesting. But as Princess Rarity said, a bit rushed. Looking forward to the next chapter, I guess
Interesting concept, but I agree that it feels rushed and underdeveloped. Sloppy writing can kill a good story.
Well, im looking forward to this being updated. (and hopefully shipping)
Will read later //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Vinyl_Scratch_lolface.png
Now that I've had a read, you could have put another week into it. The characters are hardly developed. There is really no scene involved. Was Tavi only like a 20 second walk away from the hospital and that's why there wasn't a rush to get to her place? The club was rushed to all hell and no description was provided about any of the settings. Even the hospital room where there would have been IV cords, needles, big whirring machines, there was none of that.
If you need a hand for anything in future writings, send me a message if you want a hand on proof reading, tweaks etc... Sorry if I sound like a bad person, but I see so much potential in this story and all you need is description and characters that you can understand what they're doing.
Very good nonetheless and I hope to see more.
Thanks a lot for the constructive criticism, guys! I'm just a amateur writer. Still a freshman in high school, so my grammar is off, but anyway...
1571950 I do agree that it's rushed. Ill work on it later, but honestly, it was. I woke up from a dead sleep and needed to get a idea off my head.
1572868 yeah... I know. I re-read it and figured Need to rewrite the whole story...
1573366 Sorry, bro! I'm not really a 'shipping' sorta guy.
1582770 THANK YOU, YOU ARE AMAZING. Setting is one of my main problems when I write. I will definately heed your words.
1572571 Come on, Texxy, what do you really think?
Like I said. All of you helped a LOT!
Another problem of mine is that I write these on a note-taking software on my nook. So... yeah. You should, or should I say shouldn't, read my first fanfic. It was when I was into shipping... Possibly my worst work yet.
Anyway, I will continue this, tweak it a little, and don't forget to check out the base of this story "Heart of Vinyl"
Thanks, all!
Aagh! I forgot to mention, I usually offer suggestions to my favorite authors... I even suggested something to Christopher Paolini once
. Anyway, like I was saying, please feel free to PM me if you have any suggestions!
Thanks, all!
1586727
I once sent in all the spelling errors in his Eragon book series and I got a thank you note back from him or his agent or something
Happy to help!
My friends, brothers and sisters! I have a quest for you! If any of you are artists, maybe you could help me with something. I need a drawing of MC. In 'Heart Of Vinyl' he's gonna be more of a big character. So, if you wait for the next chapter or two of HOV, then you'll get details about him and stuff. I know this Is a big request, and I can't do much for you, but I can mention your name/OC in the story. Think about it!
Thanks!
~Jeta~