Episode Two: Pegasus Wings
Who are the Mythbuckers? Rainbow Dash-
"Am I missing some feathers?"
And Applejack-
“Oh Luna not the grain silo-”
Together, they have over thirty seconds of special effects experience!
Joining them is Sweetie Belle-
“Dumb blasting clay.”
Scootaloo-
“This seems dangerous. I like it!”
And Apple Bloom-
“Let’s build something to break!”
They don’t just tell the myths... They put them to the test! They are...
THE MYTHBUCKERS!
“Welcome, fillies and gentlecolts, to the second episode of Mythbuckers! I’m your host, Applejack. Joinin’ me is my good friend and stunt-pony, Rainbow Dash!”
Rainbow Dash posed proudly, flaring her wings in front of the camera while Applejack rolled her eyes. “Thanks, AJ! Now that we’ve figured out how this whole thing works, it should be a little more smooth flying for us and our totally amazing camera crew.”
Behind the camera, the two unicorns smiled and waved. The three hyperactive fillies beneath them shrieked and laughed as they played, causing Twilight to steady the recorder and glare downwards.
“Girls! Calm down, we’re on air. If you keep running around, you’ll cause awful camera shake and it will make everything look bad.”
“Twilight! When do we get to go on screen?” Apple Bloom sat down on her haunches and gave the unicorn a pitiful look.
“Hush. It’s Applejack’s and Rainbow’s show first, girls. Let them talk.”
“Thanks, Twi.” The orange earth pony pulled her feathered friend close to share the camera. “Dash, Ah believe it’s your turn for the intro.”
Rainbow Dash smiled and gently elbowed her friend out of the picture. They were standing inside one of Sweet Apple Acres’ many old barns, so chosen for its spaciousness and expendability. Applejack and Rainbow Dash had taken time between episodes to renovate the rickety building into a suitable warehouse for all the tools and knickknacks they may need to use. The wall behind the two was lined with containers, labelled with descriptions ranging from “Horseshoe Nails” all the way to “Rainbow Juice (UNSTABLE)”. Between the camera and the showponies was a sturdy workbench. Various objects were scattered across the table, displacing piles of dust into the air. Somewhere around Rarity and Twilight, a filly sneezed.
“You’re darn right it’s my turn,” Dash chuckled before squaring up to the camera. “Right. So. Last episode we bucked the myth that when a unicorn spell fails, it causes something really cool and disastrous. Turns out they just kind of fizzle out. We got a lot of viewer responses about that episode, and it was a huge success! But more importantly, we got a lot of viewer questions too. MegaColt from Appleloosa wrote to us...”
Dash fumbled with a sheet of parchment, desperately trying to unfold it with her hooves. After a moment, Twilight sighed and levitated it in front of the pegasus.
“Oh, thanks! MegaColt writes: ‘Dear Mythbuckers: Is is true that pegasus wings are really fragile?’. That’s an awesome question, viewer! However, I can tell you from personal experience that our wings are n-”
“Well wait just a moment, Rainbow,” Twilight cut in, magicking Dash’s mouth shut. “That’s called a personal anecdote, and is not a scientific way of going about proving or disproving a myth. Just because you have nigh indestructible wings doesn’t mean that any random pegasus can go about crash landing every five minutes. Besides, didn’t you break your wing once before?”
“Well yeah, but I was on the edge of the sound barrier, doing a triple barrel roll loop-de-loop grandioso extreme, and my wing clipped a rock. That’s not exactly a situation an average pegasus finds themselves in. This myth covers our whole race.”
“Right. So we should still test it because you’re an exception, okay?” Applejack patted Dash on the back, nodding smartly. “First off, we’ll need to build some sorta fake wing. Then, using my bucking expertise, we test exactly how much force is required to damage it. If’n the wing stands up to my extended abuse, the myth will be bucked.”
“That doesn’t sound that exciting.”
“And, if we buck that myth, we see just what exactly it takes to damage that wing.”
“Now you’re talking!” Dash pawed at the ground, preparing to take off to her assignment, but the earth pony stomped a hoof on her tail.
“But hold on a few more minutes, Rainbow Dash, we’re not done here yet. Thanks to a larger budget, we’re going t’ test not one, but two myths today! C’mon up, you three.”
The four mares in the room struggled not to laugh as they watched the three fillies clamour their way onto the tall workbench, playfully fighting each other for the first spot on air. Sweetie Belle was the first to center herself, and the other two moaned as they flopped onto their haunches next to the unicorn.
“Hello wonderful folks in Canterlot and Ponyville and Cloudsdale and Fill-”
“Get on with it, Sweetie Belle!”
“Don’t tell me what to do, Scootaloo!”
“Both of you stop fighting!”
“You first, Apple Bloom!”
“Nuh-uh!”
“Girls.” The unicorns frowned at the foals, tapping their hooves. The purple pony shook her head and spoke in a condescending tone. “Be professional, remember?”
“Yes, dears,” Rarity added formally. “Leave the fighting until we need higher ratings.”
“Rarity!”
“Oh hush Twilight, it’s all for fun. Now, girls, shall we proceed?”
“Yes, Rarity,” they chorused, lowering their heads. Sweetie Belle looked back to the camera with a slight sniffle and spoke again.
“So, we’re the build team! Rainbow Dash and Applejack hired us to help them test the myths. They thought they’d start us with something simple, so they gave us this one to try out.”
Apple Bloom reluctantly handed the unicorn a piece of parchment. The paper was torn and crumpled, as if it had been fought over earlier. Sweetie Belle attempted to levitate it in front of her, accidentally crumpling it instead. Whining quietly, she flattened the note on the table and read it.
“Ahem. This comes from Vulpin of Fillydelphia. ‘Dear Mythbuckers: Is chocolate milk actually highly explosive?’. What a great question, Vulpin! What do you think, Apple Bloom?
The earth filly jumped up, eclipsing Sweetie from the camera before talking. “Now, we’re just kids an’ all, and Applejack says Ah’m not allowed to touch the matches... But this sounds like a fun myth to test! We’ll just need a lil’ help is all. Scootaloo? Any ideas?”
The orange and purple pegasus was shaking in anticipation. “Yeah! I got a great idea! First we check and see how flam.. flem... flerm... how easily chocolate milk burns! With just a little bit, first, to be safe. Then we try and light a whole glass on fire.”
Sweetie Belle tilted her head in confusion. “What if we find out it doesn’t burn?”
“Then I guess we drink the chocolate milk.”
“Yaaaay, everypony wins!” The trio cheered as they burst off the table and out of the barn in a fit of ecstasy. Rarity turned, concerned.
“But, girls, wait! Be careful!”
“It’s alright.” Rainbow Dash flew over the counter and consoled her friend. “We all drank chocolate milk as foals. We let them drink chocolate milk. When have any of us ever had a problem? They’re going to buck that myth really fast, get a big treat in the process, and feel like they helped us out. What could possibly go wrong?”
Rarity started laughing. “Oh, goodness, look at me go again. My my, Rarity dear, you really do let your emotions get out of hand, don’t you? Thanks, Rainbow Dash. You’re absolutely right.”
“As always,” she winked. “So, are we ready to get this show on the road?”
“Not quite,” Applejack sighed. “I wanted to wait until the kids were out of the room first.”
“What seems to be the problem?” Twilight asked, her face scrunching up in curiosity.
“Well, we got a lot of viewer questions regardin’ two subjects I’m not entirely comfortable with. Here, Twi, you can read them,” Applejack muttered, sliding two pages across the bench. Twilight leaned in close and read them aloud to the camera.
“Dear Mythbuckers: Does a pegasus really ‘popfeather’ when sexually aroused?”
The entire group broke into a fit of giggles. Dash was the first one to regain her breath and spoke between gasps, clutching at her chest.
“Well of course we do! That’s not even a myth! Ahahah... Oh, colt, why would so many ponies even ask that?”
“Well, consider this, Dash,” Twilight countered with a smile. “Not everypony who watches this show is from pegasus-rich populations. Appleloosa is mostly earth ponies, and Canterlot is almost entirely unicorns. How can they know for sure?”
“Good point, Twilight... just... wow, haha. Read the next one, I’m sure it’s probably great for a laugh too.”
Rarity gently kneed Twilight to the side before she could look at the paper. “My turn, dearie.” She cleared her throat before continuing. “Dear Mythbuckers: Is Rainbow Dash really a lesbian?”
“What’s a lesbian?” the pegasus asked, suspicion overtaking her muzzle.
“You know,” Applejack replied. “A filly-fooler.”
“Oh, you mean a mare-mun-”
“Dash! This is a family show!”
“Sorry, Twilight. So wait, they’re asking if I’m...”
There was a pause as the smile fell off the athletic mare’s face. The rest of the crew shuffled their hooves, coughing awkwardly. Slowly, everypony turned to Dash.
With a shake of her rainbow mane, Dash snorted derisively. “That’s... incredibly offensive. Oh Luna. Wow. Not cool. Not cool one bit. But I suppose we’ve a show to put on, don’t we AJ?”
Applejack nodded with care, unsure of what was to come.
“No. This myth is officially Bucked. And no, possibly sweet viewers of ours, we are not doing any ‘thorough testing’ on the matter. I am guaranteed one-hundred percent not a lesbian.” She turned to her friends and muttered. “Frankly, I never understood why anypony would limit themselves to a single gender.”
The rest of the crew nodded in agreement, before shaking their heads at the letter in front of them.
“Not one bit of sense, that.” Rarity grinned weakly and hugged Dash. “But, it would be terribly awful for one little letter to ruin our show.”
“Thirty-seven.”
“Pardon, Applejack?”
“Thirty-seven letters. That’s how many ponies asked that. About forty asked the popfeather question.”
“... Oh wow. Let’s uh... Why don’t we just move on to the show?”
“Good idea.”
---
“Uh, Applejack?”
Rainbow Dash stood in the centre of the warehouse, nervously glancing at the cleared space around her. All the old, heavy equipment had been shifted to the sides of the barn, and a large square was roped off by caution tape. The blue pegasus was in the middle of the space, one wing spread as wide as it could go.
“Uh, yeah Dash?”
“You’re starting to scare me.”
Applejack looked back at Dash, giving her a questioning look. She stretched a leg, subconsciously taking aim at the outstretched wing. “Well why so, Dash? It’s not like you haven’t been through worse.”
Rainbow Dash gulped as her earthen friend shook her rump, preparing to buck with all her might.
“Well- it- you know, this hardly seems scientific.”
Applejack squinted at the pegasus.
“Well then how d’ you suggest we determine your bone density?”
“Preferably not by kicking me.”
“Uh, Applejack?” Twilight tentatively poked the orange mare. “I can be of assistance here.”
Rainbow Dash wiped the sweat off her brow as Applejack sighed, walking over to Twilight. “What can ya do for us, hon?”
“Well, first off, you need to build a replica. Like you said in the introduction.”
“That was a script I just read.”
“Oh. Well, either way, you can’t just go around blowing up Rainbow Dash’s wings.”
Rainbow Dash nodded, trying to hold back a grin.
“Well what in tarnation are we s’posed to do then? We can’t hardly pull a pegasus skeleton out of thin air. You can’t, right Twi?” Applejack added, her voice hesitant.
“No, of course not. I can’t just make things. But with my intelligence and your handiness, it should be very easy to build the necessary devices to analyze and confirm or deny this apologue.” Twilight beamed at the other ponies, her pride in her knowledge almost blinding them.
“English, Twilight.”
Her pride deflated faster than Pinkie’s hair after losing a friend.
“We can throw together something to buck this myth.”
“Awesome!” Dash perked up, flying out of the square and away from Applejack with extreme prejudice. “So, what do we do?”
“Well,” Twilight trailed, pacing in thought. “What we really need to do is see how well the muscles in a wing protect the bones. So we can toss in some hardwood for a bone-analogue, and see if Pinkie has some sort of replacement for flesh in her basement.”
“Now hold on, Twi,” Applejack replied. “Ah appreciate the help’n all, but this here’s our show.”
“Sorry, AJ. I’ll be by the camera if you need anything.”
“Thanks dear. Now, where was I? Right. Now what we’re gonna do is, we’re gonna see how well the muscle in a pegasus’ wing protects their bones. We’ll just use some lumber for the bones, and check and see if our good friend and pyrotechnics expert Pinkie Pie has some sort of replacement for flesh.”
Dash landed, speaking hesitantly. “Wh... Why would Pinkie have flesh in her basement?”
Twilight poked her head around the camera, looking eager to speak. The earth pony sighed and nodded.
“As a pyrotechnics buff, she probably has something used to test the effectiveness or force of explosions.”
“Alright then,” Dash exclaimed, somersaulting higher into the air. “Let’s go visit Pinkie!”
---
Sweetie Belle placed a glass of chocolate milk on the ground, her movements slow and cautious. She backed away with controlled motion, never taking her eyes off the potentially harmful substance until she was in a safe--she hoped--distance away.
“BOOM!”
“AIIEEEEEE!”
Sweetie Belle launched high into the air in sheer terror as Scootaloo and Apple Bloom fell to the ground laughing, clutching at her sides as the unicorn turned and glared at them with a type of hate only a child could muster.
“Aww, you guys! Don’t do that! I almost had an accident!”
“Ahah! What’s your problem, Sweetie Belle? It’s chocolate milk! We all had some at lunch three days ago.” Scootaloo wiped a tear from her eye and flopped onto her rump. “Besides, how’re we gonna test this myth? Applejack took the matches away.”
“Don’ look at me! Ah tried t’ hide them... But my big sis’ always knows when I’m up t’ no good.” Apple Bloom frowned, biting her lower lip as she reminisced about her encounters.
“It’s alright, girls,” Sweetie beamed, immediately dropping her anger. “I was watching Twilight when she was doing some magic, and I know it’s not much, but I can make some sparks appear now.”
“Wait, wait,” Apple Bloom held up a hoof, silencing her friends. “Didn’t Rainbow Dash say something to us about it being scientific?”
“What’s ‘scientific’? Sounds like extra homework from Miss Cheerilee,” the pegasus filly laughed.
“It would be,” the unicorn sighed. “Scientific means we gotta do it in a way it can be repr... repra.... done again a lot, to check our results.”
“So...?” Scootaloo asked, rolling onto her back and stretching, bored.
“So,” Apple Bloom spoke, as if she knew what to do all along, “We can’t just blow it up. The first thing we do is see if it is flammable. And if it is, then we’ll get Sweetie Belle to light that gallon jug we got. See if it’ll just burn or something cooler.”
Sweetie Belle nodded and turned to the small glass in front of the fillies. She leaned forward and closed her eyes, her horn glowing as electrical sparks appeared in the air around them.
“Just... gotta... aim... a little... closer...”
---
“You want ballistics gel.”
“Ba-whatstics gel?”
“Ballistics gel,” Pinkie repeated, keeping her eyes focused on her work instead of her friends.
They were all standing in the basement of Sugarcube Corner, watching the pink pony mix chemicals and pack tubes with odd-smelling powders and liquids. Applejack inspected the various machines and utensils that littered the counters of this seldom-seen room of the bakery. Twilight and Rarity were both frozen in the middle of the room, taking care not to disturb so much as an air particle lest they cause some catastrophic event. Rainbow Dash, however, was chaotically flying around the room, handling any object that seemed to catch her attention.
“C’mon, Pinkie,” the pegasus urged, almost slamming a bottle of nitroglycerin back onto the shelf--much to the unicorns’ dismay--and hovering around the increasingly frustrated earth pony. “Stop playing with these toys and tell us what it is and where we can find it.”
Pinkie sighed and gently placed the beaker she was holding back on the table. “Dash, I really wish you’d be a bit more careful around all my work here. One wrong move and we could all be blown past the fourth wall.”
“Ah, Pinkie Pie. You and your nonsensical statements. So, are you willing to help us or not?”
“I dunno, I’ll have to check my schedule...”
“We’ll let you hold your After-Party Party after-party.”
“Deal! Basically, ballistics gel is a mixture of gelatin powder and water that correctly matches the texture and density of muscle mass.”
Twilight’s eyes widened. “Doesn’t gelatin come fro-”
“Shush, Twilight,” Pinkie whispered to the magical pony. “Let’s not scare the younger viewers now.”
“Right. Sorry. But where did you get that?”
“You can have it imported from the Gryphon Empire. Can we change topics?”
“Sorry but... wow. Weird. Okay.”
“Just try not to think about it. Whenever the thought crosses my mind, I like to think about rock farming. Keeps the mind at ease, you know?”
“...Right. Yes. Rock... farming.” Twilight shook her head as Pinkie Pie bounced away in her typical oblivious joy. “These ponies are crazy,” she muttered, following after her friend and watching her grab a large saddlebag and jump up the stairs.
“Well what are you waiting for, guys? To the bomb range!”
“Typical Pinkie,” chorused the four mares below.
---
Scootaloo coughed.
“That was... interesting,” Apple Bloom said, choosing her words delicately.
Sweetie Belle could only stare.
“I say,” Scootaloo urged, “We go get that jug. Sweetie Belle? You all right?”
The unicorn made a gurgling noise.
“That’s the spirit. Let’s go get that jug, Apple Bloom.”
Sweetie Belle blinked a few more times before giving her head a shake and chasing after her friends. “Girls! Wait for me! Careful!”
---
Rainbow Dash fluttered her wings, flicking specks of plaster towards the annoyed earth pony beside her.
“Dash. Y’all mind? We’re trying to set this up properly.” Applejack kicked a hoof into the dusty ground of the badlands, casting a wary eye towards the Diamond Dog fields. Despite the fact that Rarity was around, the farmer was always cautious in these areas. Applejack suspected that after today, Pinkie Pie would probably scare the grubby gem-grabbers away more than the generous unicorn.
“Don’t blame me, you girls forgot to bring the water to wash me off after you made the cast.” The weatherpony continued to twitch her wings, her annoyance exaggerating her movements. “This stuff is totally not cool.”
“Relax, Dash.” Rarity turned to look at her friend, leaving Twilight to shape the gelatin in the mold. “It’s all for a good cause. If it’ll make you feel better, we’ll let you set the explosives off again.”
The pegasus straightened up, her wings flaring. Applejack coughed as the last of the plaster shot off the excited pony.
“Ah’ll take that as a yes, R.D.”
“You know it!”
“And done!” Twilight stepped backed, admiring the contraption that lay before the ponies.
The gel had formed a perfect replica of Dash’s wing, down to the very texture of her feathers. It was set around several chunks of lumber that had been sculpted to match the team’s best approximation of Rainbow’s bone structure. Rarity nodded curtly, levitating the wing and moving it to Pinkie’s designated area. The pink pony bounced in place with an exuberance only ponies on military grade drugs could hope to match.
“Ooh, goody! That looks absol-positively fantasmic, girls! I’ve set the support up over there, in that dark patch.”
“Why...” Rarity trailed, inspecting the ground with an apprehensive hoof, “Why is there charcoal everywhere? And ash? Pinkie Pie?”
“This is where I like to do all my experiments. It reminds me of home. And the grain silo. Did I tell you why the Cakes’ won’t let me use the g-”
“Yes,” everypony.
“Phooey. You four are no fun.” With that, the earth pony hopped away, oblivious to the others staring.
“...Moving on,” Twilight slurred, breaking the silence. “Applejack, whenever you’re ready. The camera is rolling and I have it focused on the wing!”
“Mighty kind a’yah, Twilight.” The orange pony trotted proudly towards the awkward setup, stopping and turning on a dime. She lowered her front, priming her rear knees for the most powerful buck she had ever given. With a wiggle of her rump and a wink to her friends, she shot her hindhooves out, pressing her forehooves forward as hard as possible to propel her body with more force than she had ever attempted in the past.
With a resounding thud she connected perfectly, bending the wing-analogue’s support with the sheer pressure of the kick. Applejack collapsed, having lost her balance from the extra push. “What’sit look like, girls? Anythin’?”
Rainbow Dash landed next to the fallen pony and pulled her up to her hooves before examining their creation.
“Aww, lame!”
It wasn’t even marked. Twilight cantered up, her reading glasses resting on her muzzle as she approached the stand. She peered intently into the yellow gelatin, pushing the thought of its origin out of her mind.
“Rock farms,” she whispered. Surprisingly, the apprehension she held towards the mold disappeared immediately with the image of Pinkie blowing up a grain silo. She smiled and whispered again. “What do you know, Pinkie, it works. Rock farms.”
“Say again, Twi’?”
The unicorn jumped, startled to notice Applejack inches away from her face.
“Oh, I just, rock fa- er, no. No damage. The ‘bones’ are perfectly fine.”
The blue pegasus’ face lit up like Trixie’s fireworks, and the apple farmer’s face balked.
“All right! Go pegasus! Go pegasus! It’s our birthday!”
Pinkie poked her head out from behind the boulder she was hiding behind. “Did somepony say birthday?”
“Uh, no, sorry.”
“That’s okay! I’ll make up something festive anyways!” With that comment, the pink pony dived back behind her boulder.
“Just whatever is the matter, dearest Applejack?”
“Well, shucks. I’m just a little plum disappointed. This here myth is Bucked, right at the get-go again. Why didn’t it work?”
Twilight walked in front of the camera, patting her friend on the back. “My best guess is that the muscle structure in a pegasus wing is evolutionarily designed to protect their skeletons. That, plus the pure raw strength needed to lift an adult pony off the ground and keep them suspended would be astronomical- It’s a wonder they ever manage to hurt themselves anywhere. Not that such a physique wouldn’t come with its own unique problems, but still...”
Applejack sighed. “So pegasus wings just ain’t fragile- not enough t’ be easily damaged, that is. Shucks! I kinda hoped we’d actually prove something for once.”
Pinkie Pie leaped over the giant stone, her eyes wild. “I know what’ll cheer you up, Applejack!”
“Whassat, Pinkie?”
“You forgot we get to find out what it actually takes to break one!”
---
“Okay, Sweetie Belle. The gallon of chocolate milk is all set up and ready to be mythed!”
“Tested, Apple Bloom. The ‘myth’ is what we’re testing.”
“Aww, shush and start zappin’ it, will yah? Ah’m getting tired.”
Scootaloo balanced on top of the bottle, her wings fluttering wildly in an attempt to keep her little body up on one leg. “Shouldn’t we back up a little? I’m all for seeing awesome stuff happen up close, but there’s no sense being set on fire for it.”
Apple Bloom considered Scootaloo’s point. “Ah suppose. But last time wasn’t dangerous! It just kinda bubbled and smoked and blinked at us. It coulda’ been Sweetie’s magic for all we know.”
“Hey! I tried my best...”
Scootaloo fluttered off of the chocolate milk, landing on the grass. She squinted hard, just barely able to make out the adults’ figures off in the distance. She turned around, surveying the land that spread from the farm to the barren badlands beyond, looking for the best hiding spot possible.
“I still have some leftover lightning-in-a-jar from one of Rainbow Dash’s last pranks! We could set it beside the chocolate milk, Sweetie Belle could hit the jar with her magic, and then we’ll know for sure it wasn’t just a mistake or misfire.”
“Wait, how’d you get that from Dash anyways? She never gives out her pranking supplies!”
“Sometimes she leaves her saddlebags out in the open while she trains!”
“...And you just dig through them?” Sweetie Belle tilted her head, her mouth scrunching up nervously. “That’s... really creepy, isn’t it?”
“Relax. Rainbow Dash sometimes asks me to get stuff out for her while she’s flying. I’m more than happy to help her in any way I can!”
Apple Bloom called out to her friends. She was several feet away now, her small head just visible over the lip of a ditch. “C’mon you two! We got stuff to explode!”
The fillies laughed and rushed around as they prepped the ominous, potentially harmful jug of chocolatey deliciousness. Scootaloo fished the jar out of her bag and set it down on top of the gallon container, the lid pointing down into the milk. She cantered over to the ditch and leaped high into the air, soaring over her friends before crashing face-first into a pile of dirt. She shook herself off and flopped over between the other fillies. With a nod from Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle once again began frowning in concentration, sparks flying from her small horn at a steady beat, her eyes narrowing as she focused her aim on the glass of electricity.
“So,” Apple Bloom whispered, nudging Scootaloo. “Anything else interesting in Dash’s stuff?”
“Well...”
---
Applejack shifted nervously on her hooves, carefully watching Pinkie Pie’s movements.
“So.. this, uh, ‘ammonium nitrate fuel oil’... Explain this again to me.”
Pinkie tilted a large barrel of brown, semi-solid gunk into a makeshift trough beneath the wing set-up with a giggle. “ANFO is an explosive, silly!”
“Yeah, I get that. But... wait. First off, where did you get all that fertilizer from? It looks awful familar, I’d reckon.”
“You weren’t using it! Besides, it’s not like you can’t get more for free. You make your own every-”
“Pinkie,” Twilight deadpanned, shoving a hoof into the pink party pony’s muzzle, “Stop. Now. Television, remember?”
“Frry Twhlht.”
Twilight pulled her leg free and walked back to the camera, shaking her head slowly. “You girls mind getting on with it? I’m getting tired.”
“Right. Okay. So, ignoring where I may or may have not stolen supplies from, ANFO is an explosive mixture. I’m only starting you girls off with a little bit at first, like a bucket or so.”
“Everypony here is missing the point,” Dash shouted, hovering with her forehooves crossed. “How do I get to set this off, and when the hay do I get to do it?”
Pinkie Pie giddily trotted to her supplies and pulled a small device out with her mouth. With a spin, she tossed the object up to the pegasus, who instinctively caught it before she even knew what was happening.
“Oh, cool, what’s this?”
“The switch for the detonator.”
“Oh. So where’s the detonator?”
“I dunno. Somewhere in that bucket.”
Dash carefully lowered the switch out of her mouth and held it in a hoof, making sure to not slobber over the active button any more.
Pinkie chuckled as she walked over to the bomb shelter Twilight was projecting. She nudged Applejack and pulled her close, whispering in the earth pony’s ear.
“That’ll keep her still for once.”
Applejack cracked a smile before checking all around her. Assured that everypony was properly protected, she angled her head towards Rainbow Dash.
“On three! Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole!”
The bucket of ANFO disintegrated in a blast of pure light, instantaneously blinding the Mythbuckers. The wing device was devoured by a wave of fire and shrapnel, the hellish ball of heat eating up the landscape faster than a parasprite on steroids. The shockwave crashed into the unicorn’s barrier, causing it to flicker momentarily. Rarity and Applejack cringed as Twilight doubled over, straining with all her might to protect her friends from any harm.
Rainbow Dash stood and drooled.
As the dust settled, Twilight sighed heavily and relinquished her shield. “Next time, we’re moving farther away.”
“Woohoo!”
Applejack was standing next to the remnants of their hard work. On a bent, charred, and partially melted metal stand hung a clearly broken wing. The fracture was right in the center of the ‘bone’: a clean break.
“Well, waddayah know about that. All it takes is several thousand pounds of force and a pegasus wing will start to break.”
Pinkie sighed. “Aww. And here I have this entire barrel of explosives and nothing to do with it.”
Rainbow Dash’s muzzle opened into the widest grin she had given in ages. Before Pinkie Pie could stop her, Dash had grabbed the container of ANFO and set it down in the crater they had just created. In a flash, she grabbed the damaged wing and dropped it into the barrel.
“Detonator?”
Pinkie already had one in her mouth, and dropped it in the drum with a flair. “Dash, you’re the bestest friend a pyro-pony could ever have!”
Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack were already several hundred feet away, constructing a more solid shelter out of chunks of granite.
“Party poopers.”
After a few minutes of cleaning up the debris of the previous blast, Pinkie and Dash had both retreated to the new shelter. They peered at the barrel in the distance, checking one last time that everything was as controlled as possible. Off by the Diamond Dogs’ fields, three creatures were hurriedly closing off every access to their underground domain. Applejack laughed under her breath before poking the pink earth pony beside her.
“We all set up?”
“We are go for Operation WHEEEEE!”
“...Right. Okay Dash! Fire in the hole! Fire in the hole! Fire in th-”
The ground shook beneath them as a massive roar deafened them all. The ponies ducked, covering their heads with their legs as they shook in terror.
“Celestia be damned, Rainbow Dash! Too early! Too early! We weren’t ready at all!” Applejack risked a glance to look at the pegasus, but was surprised to find that she was cowering on the ground as well. “...Rainbow Dash?”
“I haven’t touched the switch yet! I didn’t do anything! It came from behind us!”
The farmer twisted to look behind herself, but snapped back to cover as a pile of dust and rocks started pelting them. “What’n the wild wild world of Wonderbolts is going on?!”
As the fallout subsided, the Mythbuckers slowly stood back on their hooves, swaying on limp legs as they noticed a large plume rising behind Sweet Apple Acres.
“Darlings, up in the sky. What is that?” Rarity questioned, frowning in confusion.
A smoking object was hurtling towards them, tumbling in the air as it grew from a speck to a large ball of black, purple and orange.
“Look out beloooooow!”
The Mythbuckers cleared to the side as Scootaloo crashed into the ground in front of them, rolling forward with great speed until she collided with the granite shelter. She lay there dazed and upside down, her legs limp, her fur singed, her eyes rolling.
“Oh sweet Luna, are you okay?!” Twilight dived towards the filly, picking her up and setting her straight, and started immediately looking the pegasus over for any serious damage.
“Ch-ch-chocolate milk is explosive,” Scootaloo stuttered matter-of-factly, fluttering her wings and sighing as she felt no pain. “And I got some flying practise!”
“What the sour sugar happened, kid?”
Scootaloo leaned against Rainbow Dash, taking a quick breather before explaining.
“Scootaloo! Y’all alright?”
Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle skidded to a halt next to her friend. “That was pretty neat, Scoots,” the earth filly contiued. “It’d be a shame if we couldn’t do that again.”
“Y’all ain’t doing anything like that again! Just, hold on for a second. Scootaloo, what happened?”
Scootaloo reached her arms around Dash, cuddling into the cyan mare’s lap--much to her dismay-- before speaking. “Well, I was telling Apple Bloom what I found in Da- er, about some stuff I had stumbled onto during recess, when Sweetie said she was having troubles. She was striking the glass of lightning with magic but it wasn’t breaking or anything. So, I flew up close and I looked at the jar. The lightning was still in there, but the seal was really tight. So I hit it with a rock a few times to hopefully loosen it, but the whole glass just shattered. The lightning struck the chocolate milk, and then I got an impromptu flying lesson.”
“How was your first time gliding, sport?”
Scootaloo looked up into Dash’s eyes with wonder. “It was... beautiful.”
“Well, as long as you’re alright,” Twilight exhaled, her tense body relaxing. “So, who gets to discuss their myth?”
“Well, seein’ as Sweetie Belle went this mornin’, and Scootaloo is currently nestled into Dash, Ah think it’s mah turn.” Apple Bloom waited for any objections, and, upon hearing none, hopped onto a nearby stone and spoke towards the camera. “At first we suspected chocolate milk wasn’t explosive at all. When we tried lighting the glass with magic, it kinda bubbled and sparked and the glass turned into paper, so we think Sweetie may have just needed a little more practise. When we tried the gallon of chocolate milk, it actually caught fire. The plastic must’a contained the pressure, because it took a second before it levelled the countryside. In conclusion, we have Confirmed that chocolate milk is explosive.”
Scootaloo finally reliquished her grasp of Rainbow Dash. “Wooh, go confirma- woops!” As she stood up, her weakened legs buckled, toppling her over onto her side. “Ouch! I just landed on something, and it dug into my-”
For the second time, the earth under their hooves quaked. There was no roar this time, only a unbearably loud whumph as hot, compressed air smacked into the shelter. An instant later, thousands of pings and pows filled the sky around the frightened ponies, infinitesimal bits of wood and metal bouncing off and embedding themselves into the granite. Rainbow Dash and Applejack leaped forward, pulling their friends and sisters under themselves to shield them from the flak. The two main Mythbuckers pulled the others up and started running, hauling the group with themselves as they fled from the deathtrap of a shelter. The demonic fireball continued to spread, blasting down the rock shelter as Dash flapped her wings, groaning as she struggled to lift the group of ponies. Eventually she managed to take off, hauling the others with her until she reached safe ground. She set them down gently, before finally collapsing in exhaustion.
A charred log clattered right next to them.
A second charred log embedded itself into the dirt before them.
As small drops of gelatin started to rain, softly pattering the ground, Applejack opened her eyes and reached a hoof out towards the smoking lumber.
“Well, who’da thought it. There’s still just the one clean break.”
Twilight freed herself from the pony pile, stumbling over to the camera which had--thankfully, she thought to herself--continued to work throughout the catastrophy. “Wh... Well there you have it f-folks. Uuuugghh. Pegasus wings are not indestructible, but strong enough that they are not fragile. This byth has been Mucked.”
“The myth has been Bucked, Twilight.”
“...Right, right. And chocolate milk is Confirmed for being explosive.”
Pinkie Pie pulled Apple Bloom off of her face, shaking her mane. Somehow, the explosion had managed to make it less unruly than it was before.
“And don’t forget, ponies at home! We’re always looking for more myth ideas! Send us an email to the address in the credits. We’re always looking for more fun myths to test like these!”
“But, ah,” Applejack laughed nervously, “Please suggest something less dangerous to our crew.”
“Good luck with that,” Rainbow Dash coughed. “Well kids? Should we go home?”
“I think the hospital is probably a wiser choice.”
“You’re absolutely correct, Rarity. I’m going home.”
The others paused, looked themselves over, and laughed before slowly limping after their blue friend.
---
Mythbuckers, Episode 2: “Pegasus Wings”
Concept by AuroraDawn and Autumn Wind
Support and Research by #LunarStudy
Produced by AuroraDawn
Edited by FoolontheHillz
Picture by Pustulioooooo
Suggestions for another episode? Send your Equestria-related myth ideas to AuroraDawn.mlp at gmail.com! We’re looking for fun ideas, such as parodies of fanon cliches (Unicorns fail spells, pegasus wings are incredibly fragile, etc.) and show references (Chocolate milk is highly explosive).
Thanks!
---
If you like my stories, please consider donating.
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan made fiction, based on the animated show “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.”, and the Discovery Channel show “Mythbusters”. I do not own, nor lay any claim to My Little Pony or any related intellectual property, nor to Mythbusters and any of it’s related intellectual property.
This work was made entirely for entertainment value and as a tribute to the amazing work of the Friendship is Magic and Mythbusters production teams. It is not, and will never be, distributed for profit.
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189310
LOOKS LIKE THIS MYTH HAS BEEN BUCKED
Wow, that took quite some time :D
Worth every second of waiting. I can only wonder how Fluttershy must feel about all the pyrotechnics and explosions the rest of the crew is recklessly setting off. I don't fault her for staying away, really.
...crap, I thought I'd be more ready with suggestion ideas.
Great
Updates! And I just started tracking this story a few days ago.
Wait, RD says “Frankly, I never understood why anypony would limit themselves to a single gender.”
>MFW This updated:
This was completely worth the wait. Awesome job.
I wonder what the limits on teliportation are. Also I'll laugh if someone sends in a question reguarding Nightmare Moon and foal eating.
Dear Mythbuckers, This is Gundanium Wings Zero from Neigh Yoke Manehatten, I was wondering if is it true that Miss Rarity is a Marshmallow that was transformed into a Pony as product of an advanced magic spell created by a loney mare who wanted a family a thoustand years ago?, there's been so many kind of rumors about her that is almost practically mind-bolwing already
I can honestly say: it's about time I see this crossover. Keep up with these stories and I can see this really going somewhere, choosing Applejack and Rainbow Dash was also a clever choice, if not downright obvious. Overall I would have to say I did like this and I'm excited to see what other stories you have planned for this.
Also I have a myth for 'ya. Is it true that an Ursa Major is truly impossible to beat? Yeah, I can see you having fun with this.
239174
=D Love the Ursa Major one! I may use that~
Sweet Apple Acres, you updated!
How indestructible ARE the royal sisters?
239312 I like this....and so will pinkie
but bucking good episode bro. just wish they would actually make a episode of this...
238972
And then the rest of the crew nods in agrement
So they are bisexual. Mkay then.
Is Scootaloo actually a chicken?
But we never got an answer to the most important question!
WAS there anything else interesting in Dash's stuff?
An Idea: How strong are the suits of metal and helmets that are made specifically for the Royal Guards?
Awesome! I'm happy this updated :D
and i see what you did thar with Dash
Dear Mythbuckers,
Can Wood, enchanted or otherwise, conduct electricity, enchanted or otherwise? If so, could it transfer that energy to, say, a light-bulb?
-The Librarian
Bravo! Like it was stated before, well worth the wait. I truly enjoyed this episode and I am really looking forward to seeing more.
Wow.. so chocolate milk is explosive.. cool anyways.. great job so far i wish i had an idea for a myth.. but i don't..
Dear Mythbucker
Can fluttershy cause cuteness diabetes from her cuteness, especially from sipping juice from a juice box?
Well. That was epic.
Boo for wingboners being real. Yay for universal Equestrian bisexuality. And kudos on self producing fertilizer.
The fun has been doubled!
No literally. Chapter 2 was exactly twice as good as chapter 1 was.
Everything is better with explosions, EVERYTHING!
-This has been a PSA from Michael Bay
Guys, guys. Clearly, we need more explosions in this show. My suggestion? Do explosions explode spectacularly when exploded using preemptive explosions combined with military grade explosions? Also, is it true that Pinkie keeps [REDACTED] in her basement?
No, seriously, this is awesome. I can't think of any good suggestions at the moment but I'll get back to you on that.
i see ya drivin round town with the girl I love, and I'm like "BUCK YOU~!" anyway how about tasting the rainbow as a myth. keep goin and stay golden^^
Dear Mythbuckers: Is it True thata pony can explide twice?
Signed: Gundanium Wings Zero
91259
THIS. SO MUCH THIS.
Hmm... All I can really think of at the moment is something to do with extinguishing pinkies supply in an impromptu Mainhattan project....
I'll let you know if I actually come up with something.
Anyway, This chapter was great.and I think that we should never ingest chocolate milk again, for fear of explosive repercussions.....
Here, have a myth to buck :)
We've all seen Celestia's mysterious identical guards, but why do they all look the same? Is it enchanted armour giving them false looks, or are their manes and coats meticulously dyed every few weeks? Could they be clones of the same pony indentured to Celestia thousands of years ago?
Hmm... no, no, too dangerous...
Oh! Is it true that every part of a dragon is incredibly magical?
Oh wow! XD Explosive Chocolate milk?! I grant you 4 Flutter-yays and a track
I haven't even started reading this and I have bursted into laughter. Tracked.
239550 yes i wanted to also know
239258 and THIS
Dear Mythbuckers,
What are clouds made of? How do pegasus ponies walk on them in spite of weighing as much as an average pony? Oh wait— you guys bust myths, not make scientific explanations. My bad. Never mind then.Sorry if I have wasted your time.
Signed: Timmy "Kiroku" Timer, assistant of nightelf37
275911
Ahahahahahahah
Oh my god you have no idea
How funny that is to me
Words cannot... CANNOT EXPLAIN
How frustrating that is to me
I'm laughing between every line break
Because it's totally freaking true holy crap
Thank you
Thank you so much
277029
Really? It was that funny?
277250
Of the several hundred suggestions I've gotten since the first have come out, maybe 10 of them have been in the proper format of a letter, with an actual question as to the validity of a myth.
The rest have been "Are unicorn horns erogenous" or "What are clouds made of". Not testable questions, just Yes/No answers
“Rainbow Juice (UNSTABLE)”...
*Starts beating head very, very, very hard multiple times!*
DIRTY THOUGHTS, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!! GET OUT!
Dear Mythbuckers.
By the natural laws of magic, the color of a unicorns magic will be the same as the respective casters eye color.
To give an example of this: Twilight Sparkle, the student of princess Celestia herself as well as being a powerful mage, have violet eyes as well as a violet aura.
Yet we have seen the case of the famous musician DJ Pon3, who has red eyes but a blue aura. So here's my question:
Can you explode twice?
-Glassed, Coltenhagen
how good do pinecones really taste and can you make then tastier?
Dear Myth Bucker,
Is it true that minotaurs get lost really easily? Cause I heard that they can get lost really easy if they don't have somepony to help them. If It's not true, how the hay did the myth get started then?
Signed,
Winifred Angelica Mane
EXPLOSIONS!
That is all. Best chapter yet!
I have the grandest challenge imaginable!
Explain Pinkie Pie.
Dear Mythbuckers,
A common urban legend that persists is if all toilets of a connected sewage system are activated at the same time that it results in a sudden explosive backlash at some point in the system. Is this actually possible?
Al, from Peach Creek.
Dear Mythbuckers
I had a little thinking on this maybe-a-myth. But, yeah, my question is: how is the princess mane/tail constantly moving and never stopping? And are they solid material, gas or separate fibers as in with normal ponies?
Some dude, from somewhere around the globe.
Hey brah, that part with the Scootaloo cuddling into Dashie's lap was cute.
How much whining a normal Diamond Dog can hold?
Is it really so hard for stallion like BigMac to get out of the pit?
What if Celestia will buck one myth?
How big scrolls a dragon can send through his magic breath?
Can Octavia do thingies with her bow?
How fast does Trixie runs to get out of side before her smoke bombs are blown away?
How long does it takes to grow a mane like Raritys?
There is a story about some pony who changed his\her colour and cutie mark to get into some place (ninja mumbo). How was it possible?
Diamonds are pretty strong, are there any which Spike can not crust?
There are rumors that people all over Equestria heard "You gonna love me!" roar one night. How loud Flutter Rage roar can be actually?
Is it possible to eat hydra by ponies?
Is there any sure way to deerect an erected pegasus wings?
Is it true that Zecora rhymes every single word of her speech? Every every? During any situation?
Dear Mythbuckers,
Is it possible to bring the dead back to life?
- Reverie Metherlence