Female Writer, Bisexual Writer, Smolder X Mare Crackship Connoisseur. Creator of the Smolderverse, and writer of many other kinds of clop and SFW stories (Commissions temporarily OPEN)
Opaline has been defeated, Misty is finally accepted by Maretime Bay, but everything goes downhill when she confesses to kidnapping Sparky. But surely Hitch will forgive her, it's just a silly dragon. Right?
Contest entry for the A Thousand Words Contest ll in the Drama Category.
Contains strong themes of racism against dragons, implied abuse, and one's imagination of violent scenarios.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Nice story. Hard to find ones where hitch is angry protective father.
I'm definitely with Hitch on this one. Twilight will do the same thing if something very bad happens to Spike.
Oof, hard all around.
On the one hand, I totally understand Hitch's perspective. He is 100% committed to Sparky, and if these were humans we'd be justifiably revolted with Misty's actions. On the OTHER hand, Misty is something of a special case. She's almost ludicrously ignorant, raised in a cult like environment, with her malicious benefactor implied to have been the only adult in Mistys life. Possibly the only other sapient. You did a good job in showing that with Misty, her dialogue bringing to mind racism born of innocent ignorance, rather than hatred.
What I really find interesting is this is the first fic I've found where the subject of Misty's 'programming' , if you will, is discussed. Many just transition to her being a great person straight away, rather then acknowledging her upbringing has probably damaged her in more subtle ways than the implied emotional abuse.
Hitch is understandably angry but Misty doesn't know anything other than what Opaline thought it was usefull for Misty to know.
I like that no side's completely in the right here, and that everything doesn't just get neatly wrapped up in the end. Makes it seem more like a really argument almost.
You just predicted Hitch's reaction to her when he finds out.
11602807
For real?!?! Oh my goodness, I can't wait to watch the episodes later today!
awh in fairness misty doesnt know any better, she was raised under a manipulator all her life. She genuinely didnt see him as a son and instead an animal. Saying "Opaline’s punishment is going to look like a slap on the wrist compared to what I do to you" is so fucking wrong considering how misty was raised in what was basically a cunt with 2 members. Misty has good intentions, she thought she was fighting for the right thing her whole life, only for her narrative to be shattered by the mane 5.
Wow.
As another commenter said, I love how you addressed Misty's "programming." In Make Your Mark, she knows Opaline has been lying to her, but it will still take a long time to overcome the effects. Hitch feels more like his movie self in this story. Fiercely protective of his friends and family. I could definitely see him being slow to forgive Misty in the series.
The only real complaint I have is that the dialogue felt kind of... unnatural at times.
Genuinely would've preferred something like this in canon rather than Hitch immediately shoving what Misty did under the rug, because that's just what redemption arcs in modern media do. This story feels far more in line with the Papa Bear Hitch we saw in Have You Seen This Dragon.
oof, poor Misty!
i mean, pony babies can’t talk, either!
yeah, it makes all too much sense for Misty to default to Opaline’s worldview without a reason to otherwise. i mean, that is how it seems to work a lot of the time for humans in this world!
oof, Hitch is very angry!
aww, poor raised in a cult horse!
always great to have a look at the friction between Misty’s thoughts from her upbringing and her new friends/”friends”. thank you for writing!
While you did accurately predict a development of Chapter 4, this still feels like a single scene from a larger story rather than anything self-contained. In particular, a scene that mostly yells at Misty for the crime of being raised by a villain. (Also, after the Home Alone-level shenanigans Sparky pulled during the Chapter 2 finale, there is no way Misty can think of him as just an animal. That required both creativity and no small amount of sadistic malice.)
Sorry, but this one just didn’t work for me.