Page generated in 0.077 seconds
Total duration
949 users online
196,451 hits today, 2,130,388 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
They all gonna get their asses kicked.
I highly doubt it. Considering the CMC are still children.
The CMC are in big trouble!
Oodles of run-on sentences right in the description and a title that doesn't make sense... not reading this.
11715780
No one is holding a gun up to your head and if they are blink two times
11715818 Have to admit that was one of the more humorous responses I have read.
The title tells me enough, but it also raises a question.
You don’t mean ‘This is why you should never summon adventurers to Equestria, do you?
A title that can be understood is a great way to ensure your readers know what they’re getting to read. A healthy dose of Grammarly would also help your long description. I get the feeling it was written over a few edits, as there are sentences that could be paired together or outright combined into one.
11716094
Ok. The title is pretty descriptive and other than it doesn't have a . In the description is fine. So what's confusing or complicated?
11716171
This is why you should never summit adventurous to Equestria.
This is why you should never summon adventurers to Equestria
Summit means the top of a mountain
adventurous is an adjective, meaning to take risks and try new things.
never summit adventurous doesn’t make grammatical sense, as far as I can tell. I don’t know what it means to summit adventurous because that isn’t something one can do.
It’s the opposite of descriptive because it’s meaningless word jumble. Your long description is riddled with what I call comma spam, where you are adding words and beginning sentences in a redundant way. We know this is MLP, and we can surmise the CMC personalities due to their countless show appearances. I have no context that other characters are involved for nearly four lines of text. I have no reason to assume you’re not just describing the CMC
When I do learn of them, I’m suddenly aware of these adventurers, their relationships to characters, and their personalities, which I should only get from the actual book chapters, not the description box. I think I actually get more context and plot ideas in the description than the first lines of chapter one.
11716524
Yep, that was the point
11745244
I still don’t get it.