A Spectator's Sentryence

by gapty

In the Penal Colony

Dear Silver,

I know that you still hate me for the mistake I made, but please read through this possibly last letter of mine—even if not for the fact that you care for me, then at least as my final wish.

The being that stuck to me, the “judgement of mine”, feeds off my guilt. It reminds me every day, every hour, every single minute of the poor souls I hurt when I had abused the powers. I deserved it, I truly do.

You have every right to be angry at me. You have warned me to not touch the powers of the other world, but I did, and now I suffer the consequences. I am forced to be alone, as otherwise this being, the needed reaction that had stopped me, will break down anyone seeing it—you have seen it yourself, after all, so you know what I mean.

I wish to see you again. I wish to be able to apologise to you in person and not through a letter, but I can’t anymore—I have ruined the possibility myself.

And now, I feel my last strength being taken, and soon my final breath will be done, but I worry for others, and for you. This being won’t be satisfied with me. It will want more, and choose more victims to feed off their guilt, their insecurities, their doubts.

I need to stop it. I won’t be able to kill it, but I know that it can be put to sleep.

I’m sorry to tell you that I still kept the geodes with me. I know I should’ve given them back to you already, but they kept me sane, gave me some resistance against the being. If not for them, I wouldn’t be able to survive even a day.

The magic, the powers from the other world, it’s alive. Each has a personality, resembling a trait, and I feel them being angry at me, but also at the being. The powers know that with my death, the being will choose another victim. They want to fight it, but they don’t have the right attribute to counter its effect.

Nonetheless, they rage against it, the geodes glow brightly whenever it’s near them, and I think I know how to help them. I need to make another one of them, give it the trait the being is making me feel, not to harm, but to help others, not to make one feel guilt, but compassion and empathy. This one will be the only one able to fight and defeat it.

Making this new geode will channel all their rage into it. This rage will be too much for any bearer—even one geode right now is difficult to handle—but I’ll have to be the one. My last action shall be the one fixing my mistakes.

If you got this letter and I still haven’t returned, you’ll find me in the crystal cave we had played as kids. If you have mercy over me, bury me there. Make sure you remove the magic from the geodes—you know how to do it—and search for the seventh one. I don’t know yet what colour it will get, but you’ll know it once you’ll see it.

Put these empty geodes on my grave, as a reminder for anyone else to never repeat my mistake, to never abuse unknown powers.

Keep me in your memories, and please forgive me one more time.

Sincerely,
Your lost, punished brother

Author's Note:

"He doesn't know the sentence that has been passed on him?"

"No," said the officer again, pausing a moment as if to let the explorer elaborate his question, and then said: "There would be no point in telling him. He'll learn it on his body."

Comments

[new55]

That was a good story.

[Moproblems Moharmoney]

Intrueging

[RB_]

I like this story a lot. It’s an interesting interpretation of Flash as a character, and not one I’ve seen before. I don’t mind that Flash is ‘passive’ here; that’s kinda what having depression can feel like, that you’re just kind of trudging through the day as it goes by around you.

I do think some of it’s a bit heavy-handed. Flash’s inner thoughts become really severe a little quicker than I thought they should, and with a bit less subtlety than was warranted. I also felt the end with the fight was kind of mood whiplash with how comedic it felt after everything that came before it.

Overall, though, I quite enjoyed this. Good work!

[Bicyclette]

well that is very intriguing, though i admit that i feel like i am not making all of the connections i should to fully appreciate this! what i am getting out of it is that the creator of the empathy geode used them in a long-ago fight against this parasitic being, and that the magic of the geodes themselves is alive and aware of this conflict? but i am lost on how it connects to the quotes in the Author’s Notes, or to Flash Sentry. would be interested to know!

[Jymbroni]

Agh, so many more questions! It was an intriguing story, but missed the mark in a couple of spots to really make it shine.

[gapty]

11515562
I will just assume that because reading it over several weeks made you forget many details, so here I will explain every question you asked either with quotes or spelled out. Spoilers before, so to anyone else reading it, you've been warned:

but I'm still not 100% clear on how the fake Sunset was defeat.

Quotes from the story itself:
"Entering back into his room, Flash saw the being again as it was moving quickly around the room. However, with it was what seemed to be an red coloured light resembling an alicorn–its wings widely spread and from its horn beams of light being shot at the other being."
"His mind had the first coherent thought of connecting the state of the kitchen to the two beings he saw that slashed their paws or shot flashing lights at each other;"
"After a while, suddenly each of them glowed in an even brighter light than before, before they faded and lost their glowing. At least the sounds and flashing from the kitchen stopped too."
"Nonetheless, they rage against it, the geodes glow brightly whenever it’s near them, and I think I know how to help them. I need to make another one of them, give it the trait the being is making me feel, not to harm, but to help others, not to make one feel guilt, but compassion and empathy. This one will be the only one able to fight and defeat it."
"Making this new geode will channel all their rage into it. This rage will be too much for any bearer—even one geode right now is difficult to handle—but I’ll have to be the one. My last action shall be the one fixing my mistakes." (Letter)

And to put it blantly: Flash wears Sunset's geode, which makes him see how "unicorn Sunset" really looks like, and it materialises this Element/magic into an alicorn he also sees. While he wore it, the being and the Element of Harmony as the alicorn fought each other.

Plus, what happened to the actually Sunset through all of these events? Where was she? What was happening to her? Did she have doubts the everyone would be able to pull together to save her?

Quotes from the story itself:
"I hate being stuck here. I wish to be helpful.

You are! You try to find more information about it.

(Twilight writing with Sunset)
"she didn’t know though what exactly it did that Sunset couldn’t stay in the world, and the latter had refused to even mention anything related to that." (Flash thinking)
"“I bet you’re also happy that you’re back.”" (Flash to Sunset)
Quotes from Sunset:
"I—both.
It has to work.
I see nothing else.
Because I know that it won’t with me."
"“Yep. You can’t imagine how relieved I am that the plan worked.”"
"“I am,” Sunset responded. “But honestly, I’m more happy that you, my friends, the CHS-students, and everyone who helped to defeat it came through it harmlessly. This was something we seven were far from able to deal with alone.”"

If you were going to include that, it should of been here. I want to know what was going on with Sunset since Flash is so disconnected with all these events even though he has some pretty intenese doubts.

First, the focus of the story was about Flash. Second, many of the question, as you can see, was already there.

But if it needs to be spelled out: Sunset was the whole time on the other side of the portal, because as the Element of Empathy, she has a very strong reaction to that being, as seen here:
"Sunset’s expression hardened immediately, as her eyes widened. Her chest moved quicker and quicker from her breathing. Suddenly, she shook her head.
“Let’s—Let’s not talk about what it did to me.” She took a deep breath and exhaled. “I’m sure that words wouldn’t be able to describe even a quarter of it, and I really don’t want to remember it.”"
From the letter: "Making this new geode will channel all their rage into it. This rage will be too much for any bearer—even one geode right now is difficult to handle—but I’ll have to be the one. My last action shall be the one fixing my mistakes."

So I don't really see how many of what you wrote applies. I'm thankful for you trying to help, but if it's clear to you that the story focuses on other parts then what you're looking, and when you try to search in it for something else, then I don't see how forcing yourself trying to read through it will help anyone out. It's clear that the story confused you, and I'm fine with that, but many "questions left remaining" are answered and on the plate presented.

Yes, the beginning is confusing, yes, Flash is acting passivly and it's for a longer time not clear what is going on, especially with the unicorn Sunset, but the way I write is answering these questions later on, and it seems you missed it, trying to search for something else.

[gapty]

11513704

don’t worry Flash, your weird habits will be considered eccentric and fun when you are older! at least that is what i tell myself

Later in the future: "Mum, why aren't we talking ot Grandpa Flash?"
"He drinks tea with milk"
*Panic screaming*

i mean considering how nonchalant the response to the toaster monster was, i figure things like this happen all the time at CHS now

Wall: Breaks down
Students: Yay! No exam!

aww, he thinks so highly of Sunset even when she is clearly just watching trash TV to pass the time?

Sunset: *Plays video game*
Flash: How selfless, she wants to learn of human culture.
Sunset: *starts cursing and throwing her controller at the wall*
Flash: And she destroys them to buy a new one, boosting the economy of our state with her own money.

so true, ponies are people and should not be treated like cats even when they are the same size as cats and acting like a cat would

But what if they want to be petted?

what i am getting out of it is that the creator of the empathy geode used them in a long-ago fight against this parasitic being, and that the magic of the geodes themselves is alive and aware of this conflict? but i am lost on how it connects to the quotes in the Author’s Notes, or to Flash Sentry. would be interested to know!

Once the seventh geode was created, the rage of the Equestrian magic and countering its effect has been focused entirely in the seventh Element.

With the author notes, they are basically quotes connecting it in some way to the current chapter, in this case, how the punishment is being felt on the body of him: The parasitic being that was made through his abusing of Equestrian magic.

Once he created the seventh one, the being was put to sleep, but the collective doubts awakened it, and it chose to stay at Flash, as he was the most affected it and having the best ground of feeding from and adding more doubts to him.

There is a slight headcanon I sticked with here, where Equestrian magic in itself is slightly sentient/aware on its own.

Thanks also to anyone else for commenting on this story