• Member Since 4th Jun, 2022
  • offline last seen Dec 22nd, 2022

SpectrumArtz


E

In the small pegasi town of Skysian, life was slow and life was mundane for Nimbus Storm until one day she witnessed a monster in the skies. The monster made an awful puttering noise and upon seeing what it really was, Nimbus chose to prove that her magic was more than a match for the monster born out of progress. An entry for the Equestria at War 2022 writeoff

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 2 )

I really hate seeing nice little stories like this one not getting the attention they deserve. Here you have a nice little tall tale-esque story with some nice worldbuilding and characterization thrown in to boot. If this is your first story, (which I'm assuming it is,) then you did a pretty good job of it. You had a few mechanical problems here and there, but not enough to be distracting. I might have said that it could have done with a bit more detail and slower pacing, but I think the way you wrote it is appropriate for the story-within-a-story premise you were going for. I look forward to seeing what you write next.

11274001
Thank you so much for your kind words! It's my first "published" story and I'm so glad you enjoyed it. After sitting down and rereading this, I realized that another chapter or two would have done wonders. This was my biggest non academic project and I'm excited to write more stories with a variety of characters.

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