In Aisling-On-High, She Gently Shines

by WritingSpirit

And All Places To Be

At first glance, this night in Ponyville was the same as every other that came before it. Dimming lights and nocturnal music embroidered the otherwise tranquil ocean of the town in deep slumber. And certainly, to almost every unwitting pony around, this evening would just be like any other evening. Nothing more than a blur blanketed in sweet dreams beneath soft moonlight.

Even so, Princess Twilight Sparkle descended upon the town, her dress still glittering despite the swathes of dirt smeared across the fabric. The runaway princess paused, if only to take in the air enveloping her, smiling briefly as the familiar scents of her soon-to-be former hometown engulfed her lungs.

“Do not allow yourself to be alone, Twilight Sparkle.”

She could hear Luna’s warning from all the way in Canterlot as she galloped across town.

“Do not make the same mistake that I did.”

Her last advice, echoing faintly in the fissures of her memory.

Twilight arrived at her destination minutes later. It was a place she knew she would come back to, solely with the intention of having the conversation she hoped would one day take place. She never thought that this night would come so soon, nor that she would be the one to initiate it.

Of course, there will be a time when she can worry about it later. For now, her place is right here.

“Seek comfort, should you need it.”

With Luna’s words in mind, Twilight pushed herself to knock on the door, before stepping back and clenching her eyes shut to pray to the sun, the moon and every star sparkling in between.

“Tell yourself that you deserve it.”

A light came on in the window.

“Force it upon yourself, if you must.”

Twilight held her breath when she spotted the familiar silhouette bounding over, only for her hooves to scramble in tandem with her magic when she realised the haggard state she was in.

“And when you find it, keep it.”

The front door swung open, just as she managed to brush away the last splotches of dirt from her dress.

“Keep them close.”

Yet as frazzled of a state as she may be in, the sight of the other pony alone kindled in Twilight a calm she never knew she needed. And with it, a smile no amount of practice could ever replicate.

“For there is no greater comfort than knowing there’s somepony in your life who wants to take care of you.”

A smile that soon made way for the most important question of her life.

“Can we talk?”

Comments

[Captain_Cosmos]

Nice story, though I can't help but wonder.

Who is Twilight talking to in the end?

[WritingSpirit]

11094971
Don't know, really. Could be anypony you want it to be.

[ShivalWolf]

This is soo wonderfully sad and beautiful.

[new55]

That was a good story.

[Block]

This whole story was confusing, but weirdly heartwarming. Very poetic and beautiful, yet incomprehensibly complex.

[WritingSpirit]

11099434
Yeah, this is probably one of my more obtuse stories in recent memory. Glad that you enjoyed it regardless though! Thanks for reading!

[Block]

11099482
No problem!

[daOtterGuy]

Howdy, hi!

I read this during the contest it was run in and I still enjoyed reading it again. It's beautiful and complex. There are so many threads and emotions weaving through the story that really brings forth this gorgeous prose. I enjoyed the ambiguity, surprisingly, despite not liking it in other instances. I think the ambiguity is a selling point, the sort of je ne sais quoi that makes the writing grip you when you read.

That you also leave it up to the reader to decide whom Twilight went to after gently rejecting Luna was a great moment. Let's you kind of puzzle it out and think the answer, which I think then says more about the reader then the story when they eventually decide on it.

The writing is beautiful, the prose thoughtful, and frankly it's an enjoyable read.

Thank you for the story!

[Scribblestick]

Hi there! I saw your story recommended over here and thought I'd give it a look. It turns out I had marked this story to read later anyway, so I was happy to take some time for it!

I love the mood you set in this story. I've found it hard to capture the feeling of a moment of quiet contemplation, the feeling of staring at the heavens on a warm night with nothing but your thoughts to keep you company. You did a wonderful job of it here, so much so that I'm a little envious, and may have to give it another read to piece together how you did it.

The conversation between Luna and Twilight was well done as well. Beginning with a humerous, but potentially symbolic, anectode was a good choice, and the way Luna expresses her regret is really beautiful. There is hurt there, but also a recognition that the hurt is of her own making, and that interrupting Twilight's life for her own sake would be wrong. It's especially appropriate as Luna's time is coming to an end, and so she has decided to finally make peace with herself. The fact that it is also a warning to Twilight is just an added, and wonderful, bonus.

I usually try to offer some advice or explain something that didn't work for me, but I'm having a hard time doing so with this story. I did find the occasional phrase to be clunky or hard to understand. For example:

“You should get used to being referred to by that soon.”

I know this is Luna, and she has odd phrasing sometimes, but this particular line forced me to stop and figure out what she meant. That's not always bad, but in this case, it did pull me out of the story, so I do consider it a very small flaw.

Great story. Keep up the good work!

[Bicyclette]

and agh, ending it on that last line is perfection. as is the decision to leave just who that bounding silhouette is ambiguous. i loved this fic during the Quills gift exchange commenting, and i love it now as i am rereading it. thank you so much for it, and for giving me a level of writing to aspire to

[PinoyPony]

After reading this through once, the knowledge gained prompts a second read to catch the details contributing to the buildup. That is just the thing I did.

But of course, even though she may quite be the most important pony in the room, Twilight remained content with taking up the familiar role of impassive observer.

She chuckled at herself, recalling how she spent the past few weeks agonizing over the idea of making this year’s function more interesting, only to have her responsibilities be relegated to Spike instead when she almost tore upon a rift into another dimension while deciding what colour the tablecloths should be.

The Twilight we all know and love.

“I should look for her,” Twilight opted. “It’s her last gala, after all…”

Very thoughtful of her. Normally, we do not see those that are missing, so adds depth that the Princess of Friendship is cognizant of others.

“Nothing of that sort. You’ll understand when it happens.”

Seems less spontaneous and more intentional now. In hindsight, this is the most organic the interaction can be, as Celestia must have some idea of what Luna’s going to talk to Twilight about, but not the entirety.

The cool air of the night lacquered her cheeks…

Oh! Nice description!

“Tell my sister she need not fret. I’ll return to her side once the gaggle has dwindled some.”

Like the characterization here. I relate to Luna, as gatherings can be taxing. Enjoyable, yes, but can drain your energy.

“…lest I become beguiled by their masquerade…”

I didn’t expect such a strong reaction/aversion.

…pallid trumpets that sang in silent chorus to their twinkling counterparts high up above.

“These flowers were a gift from my dear sister, you see. To celebrate my coming home.”

The metaphor sets the stage to what Luna has to offer. Datura/Thornapples; an honest mistake done in good faith. A mistake that would later become a regret

“Those are the insidious ones, Twilight Sparkle. Those are the ones you have to look out for.”

Not very comforting, Luna.

“Not every sacrifice is worthwhile.”

“regretted not doing?”

“Sometimes, what might seem cruel may be the kindest thing you can do.”

This keeps keying into the big reveal at the end. Every subtle hint.

I like the unexpectedness of everything set before us:

Yet it did not seem frail or forlorn as she had expected. Rather, there was a vivacity in it. A mischief. As though this was all according to plan.

Yet, when she was done, she would still make time for me to chare my own afflictions.

This parallel’s Twilight’s cognizance of Luna’s absence from the gala. Perhaps there is something deeper here. A double meaning. She is referring to

both Equestria and Twilight

simultaneously. That may be what you are getting at here, but at the same time, I might mistake.

That, and the ending. No doubt that Twilight was caught off-guard and not just by the sudden wing-hug.

This carries onto the next chapter where we are met with a Celestia POV:

Before Celestia could ask her sister about it, however, Luna suddenly cantered up to her and, without uttering a single word, buried her face into her chest, the softest of smiles growing on the elder alicorn’s lips when she heard the quietest of whimpers.

Luna is being emotional today, undoubtedly a change of pace for both Twilight and Celestia.

Finishing off with a Twilight POV:

It was a place she knew she would come back to, solely with the intention of having the conversation she hoped would one day take place.

Something about this makes me feel empty. It feels like a promise unfulfilled, but will be fulfilled in due time.

At first, I looked back to see if there were any clues I missed towards the identity of the pony Twilight visits, but looking at the other’s comments, I realize it is stylistic. Left to the reader’s imagination.

Altogether, glad I read this!

[DarkSnowGaming]

Ya I have so many questions, my curiosity is gonna drive me crazy now, thank you.