The Foal Help Line

by DanishDash

Pip's Camera

Ring ring, ring ring.

"The Foal Help Line, this is Stardust."

"H.. Hi, my name is Pipsqueak.."

"Hello, Pipsqueak! What can I do for you?"

"I'm calling because I... I have a problem."

"Calm down, sailor. Problems exist to be solved."

"It's because I... I stole something, down at the market."

"Oh, and what have you stolen, kid?"

"A camera."

"A camera? That's nothing to be sad about, Pipsqueak. That's an excellent start."

"I've just laid in bed all night, thinking about what I should do.. Sob.."

"Well how were you supposed to know? You're new to the trade, kid. Listen hear. You go to Swift Hoof's garage, and say hello from me. He may seem a little harsh, but he's actually fair enough. Just don't pet his dog. "

"But I didn't-"

"You just have to put a little pressure on him. He'll probably offer you a few hundred depending on the quality. If I were you, I'd stick to ten percent of the recommended purchase price. Don't let him push you around, kid."

"But didn't want to steal the stupid camera at all! ...Sobs.."

"No, of course you didn't. You went for a JoyBoy. Calm down, Pip, all beginnings are difficult."

"But can we not-"

"Practice makes perfect."

"I'm not-"

"Good luck, kid!"

Click!

Comments

[Thelumpmeister]

this is gonna be horribl......

....y good.

[Thelumpmeister]

I finished reading it.
It would make an idealistic philosopher cry.

[DanishDash]

11081706
No idea what that means, so I'm gonna take it and twist it into a compliment! XD

[Thelumpmeister]

11081707
it means that the most straight to earth, most good natured philosopher would read it and cry.
now i know that the danes have a bad rap with the english, but that's what english comedy is laik

[DanishDash]

11081736
I've consulted a third party, a native English speaker, and we have concluded it is a compliment.

[Communist-Party]

As soon as I read the description I thought: "Huh, sound like uncle stewart from that danish comidians works." I'm not disapointed

[DanishDash]

11081813
Nicely spotted, this is the pony version of him. ^^

[Boopy Doopy]

I read through this all, and it was... not great, honestly. I was expecting an adult swearing and giving advice that doesn't make much sense or is from fifty years ago that doesn't apply today or an adult that is completely confused by the situation. Instead I got an adult making fun of foals for things they can't control and encouraging child abuse.

[DanishDash]

11082337
That is indeed the way he is, he also drinks a lot, not that I mention that. Sorry you didn't enjoy it, but thank you for reading it nonetheless.

[Blaze the draconic mage]

I love how horrible this guy is!