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I never asked for power or leadership. Royalty was a collar around my neck and a weight on my heart. A mask of superiority was born to keep them from realizing how our world was crumbling down to dust. No longer will my people live in the shadows. This plan has to work.
Art by Yula586 on Deviant art https://www.deviantart.com/yula568
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Nicely written, I look forward to more!
10987840
Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.
seems like a different take on Chrysalis. I'm in.
so far everything sounds interesting. Let's wait to see what happens.
An interesting first chapter. I look forward to more.
I'll be curious to see if the human (on his cell phone) is in equestria. Or if Chrysalis got blown to Earth.
parece que te has puesto un reto, porque no puedo pensar en una forma satisfactoria de que termine esto. buena suerte
10988989
You know what they say about assumptions.
I have to say that I love the picture for the cover. Also a very interesting start. I wonder if Kelly and the unnamed counter part are the results of being alone without contact with others for too long or if there's an actual body share going on.
10989611
A good question.
Very neat story, well written and it has good flow. You get a follow. Any idea when we will get more
10990434
The next chapter is coming within the next few days. After that I'm not sure. Hopefully weekly or biweekly updates.
Good
Promising start. Always up for a good Chrysalis story
looking forward to the next chapter
You're doing a good job with this story so far cant wait to see more
Really nice story can't wait for the next update ^^
is this some kind of crossover with the series "Stargate"? Because Alison with her "sister" is reminiscent of the symbiotic or parasitic union from this series. Although the description of our man's armor does not at all look like the armor from the TV series. (For some reason, my head paints this armor to look like the crusader armor from "Darkest Dungeon")
I love you
10993404
Nope. I hadn't seen any stargate until a friend of mine pointed out the similarity with the Goa'uld. Purely coincidental.
10993407
And I love you, random commenter!
10993416
then you can find out who or what became the source of inspiration for the creation of this character?
10993434
He's a character I've wanted to write about for years. His inspiration doesn't really come from a singular place. More just a style of character, headstrong and wellmeaning but not the brightest. Which a lot of main characters fall under.
Additionally the armor clothing, is suppose to be a mix of jet flightsuit and semi futuristic spacesuit. Which Chysalis would have no knowledge of and wouldn't be able to compare them.
Im really liking this so far. Hope it keeps going!
I need more of this.
More please. I'll give you my love supplies.
Interesting start, always up for some good Chryssie stories.
A-plus diplomacy from Chryssie, there.
'This is Steve, my talking tapeworm friend."
I like it so far. I think the only mistakes are random tense shifts and capitals.
One question: Will there be romance between Chrysalis and the human?
10997324
Nothing planned, no.
Oh noo, not the feels, Nooo
Starts crying
I'm not crying you are
Stealth stargate crossover?
10998326
Nope. But similarities exist.
10998025
I see this as a major win, by the way.
10994653
Thank you for the actual criticism. I appreciate it.
10993926
Where they at?
Enjoying it so far, keep it up.
11011224
Go for my head. Probably in there.
This is heartwarming. I can't wait for the next chapter. I hope it comes soon.
Can't wait for the next chapter
I’m enjoying it but I felt their was a little too much exposition from you’re OC.
That's valid. Dang it.
Where Alison and kelly come from is different from both equestria and earth so most explanations are difficult to keep simple. When I try and give a truncated answer, I feel as though it just causes so many more questions. But I am trying to work on that.
This is amazing and feels really compelling, can’t wait for more!
11076039
Thanks! I hope to actually do more work on this soon.
I've been stricken with the writers curse.
As soon as I started writing this story like 5 major things happened which sucked up all my time. Dang it.
Very not dead though. So thats good.
This is wonderful, waiting patiently for more
11150103
I'll do my best to make the wait shorter then.
11150893
just came back to this out of curiosity and this fills me with much hype, hope you're able to continue, I'm gonna reread this and enjoy it all over again
Update?
11321233
You drive a hard bargain I must admit.
This is great! I had to make an account so I could keep track of it, good job 👌👌👌
Really nice story.
I really like the 'Mama' vibes that Chrysalis gives in this chapter. Just in general, I really like this version of Chrysalis that shows feelings while also understanding her mistakes that she made.
Pls give as more of this piece!