This story is a sequel to The Sisterverse Social
What do you do when you're forced to choose between what you love, and what is right?
Radiance, the older sister of Twilight Sparkle, has finally gotten her dream job as an officer at the Canterlot Police Department. However, before she's even hardly found her bearings, she witnesses a group of police beating an innocent pony. Now she must decide who to tell about what's really going on--or even if she should tell anyone at all.
Written in the belief that it is not a crime to treat other people like human beings.
Set in the Sisterverse, established in "The Sisterverse Social." In this universe, the Mane 6 are composed of three sets of sisters: in this case, Rarity and Sweetie Belle, known as "Radiance" and "Moonlight Serenade", are the biological children of Night Light and Twilight Velvet, making them siblings with Twilight and Shiny.
Many thanks to my prereaders: Matt, Krack-Fic Kai, and PresentPerfect.
Super-Special thanks to daisychains and The Cloptimist, who gave an enormous about of help as dialect coaches.
Art by the wonderful LiaAqila. Go give her a comission!
Definitely a good start to this story. Loved Radiance's reflections on the job so far, as well as her frustration on what she was TRYING to type out.
On to the next chapter.
Again, really good job on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. And, yeah, I can kind of understand the banter between the rookies (though Radiance is ironically SLIGHTLY more experienced than the other rookies when you count adventures against Nightmare Moon, Discord, Chrysalis and MAYBE Sombra) before that incident with the Earth pony suspect (and, yeah, I can see an eventual "two of my best friends, as well as their siblings, happen to be Earth ponies!" line coming out). And Radiance's reflection on the bad habits her fellow rookies have been picking up already from the more experienced officers was another valid concern.
But, yeah, the start of this story is understandably emotional and I will definitely be looking forward to more of this.
Oh, this is going to be deeply intense. Looking forward to seeing where you go with it.
Law Enforcement story? That's quite new, but considering Law Enforcement is one of my favorite subjects, it's a welcome addition.
You need a solid emotional foundation to tackle a crack in your ideological one. If you don't have somewhere to stand, it's hard to get anything done. Now to see just what Radiance can do about this after the pick-me-up.
Excellent job on this latest chapter. Love the work that went into the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Yeah, I can definitely understand Radiance's frustrations, but her apartment-mates have an excellent point about her needing to do something about it. And, yeah, I can see where Radiance might be JUST paranoid enough to think somebody on the force might remove a negative report before it can reach anyone high up enough to make a real difference. Of course, considering she HAS probably helped save Equestria at least three or four times by this point, she could use that clout to take it DIRECTLY to the Princesses themselves (i.e. THE two highest authorities in all of Equestria and somebody her department will HAVE TO listen to) in pony.
Again, very certainly looking forward to more of this.
Hm, in the original blog discussing this story I remember a lot of conversation that was making it seem like it would lean toward a crystal pony story. Using earth ponies instead makes me wonder what changed during the creative process, but also how convincing the new dynamic will be. I'm having a hard time seeing why unicorns who have been integrated to live with earth ponies (and know their magic) for over a thousand years would have a somewhat sudden bias toward them. It would certainly make more sense if it had always been there, or at least in certain pockets of society, but the 'why' remains a head-scratcher.
Considering how shocked Radiance was of any possibility for wrong-doing, I do think that her motive in this chapter for not wanting to go the usual route (probable paperwork) came about too quickly. If she has never witnessed any hint of corruption and suspects an assault took place when she has only ever witnessed lawful application of force, it does seem odd for her to come to the conclusion that her report won't be taken seriously this quickly. This isn't to say that it isn't a realistic, clever display on Rarity's part to understand that ponies might not follow the rules, but it comes about a mite too quickly.
Your cover art is also gorgeous.
An ambitious project and one that's going to be tricky to handle respectfully, but I think you're doing a fair enough job so far. I'll be keeping an eye on this, and I wish you best luck.
And so we have the other side of the story... and some distressing past experiences. Now to see what Radiance does with all this information.
I don't suppose Twilight is still Celestia's student in this timeline? Going over the chief's head to blow the whistle would be a very helpful fallback option.
Excellent job on the exchange, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Yeah, that was a good chat Radiance had with Kingfisher. And, yeah, from the dialogue, I'm guessing this is set BEFORE (or at the exact same time as, at least) the return of the Crystal Empire/fight with Sombra. The detail of Scottish/Trottish Crystal Ponies IS a really good world-building detail. And, I can not only sympathize with Kingfisher's backstory, but I can also see Kingfisher being surprised by Radiance ACTUALLY treating him with compassion after what he went through with the more experienced officers. And, yeah, I AM surprised Radiance hasn't thought to take advantage of her connections (her younger sister being Princess Celestia's personal student, Princess Cadance being her sister-in-law and her AND Twilight being two of the six mares who freed Princess Luna from Nightmare Moon's influence) to go over the heads of the veteran officers.
VERY certainly looking forward to more of this.
Where were Twilight and Serenade? They really couldn't attend their own sister's graduation?
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To be fair, they probably moved to Ponyville shortly after the Nightmare Moon incident like Twilight did in canon and Radiance doesn't see much of Twilight anymore outside of "Mane Six business" (two hours there and another two hours back unless they hitch a ride from Rainbow Dash). Twilight and Serenade probably DID send a really nice letter of congratulations though.
And, besides, considering graduation was only four days ago, it's possible that Twilight was busy with the recent return of the Crystal Empire. Saving the world DOES kind of trump your big sister's graduation from the police academy after all.
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A little more than four days, but the point stands--it wasn't all that long ago.
I'll catch up on all the comments tomorrow, I promise!
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Gotcha. That's more than fair enough. Thanks very much for the correction.
Oh my gosh! Scottish crystal ponies! And a crystal pony that didn't disappear? This is a very intriguing idea, so much so that it was worth reading close to midnight during midterms! (There is a character tag just for the crystal ponies, by the way!)
I know this story is meant to be delicate and serious, but the accent gave it a wonderful charm, despite the somberness. It was so worth it for you to indulge in it. Please keep up all the good work!
This took me out of the immersion a bit. There are a number of assumptions that don't quite mesh with Equestria in general and Canterlot in particular, at least how I pictured them.
That aside, an excellently chilling scene. Because from the commissioner's perspective, it's justified. He just wants his people to go home to their families every night. It's just the heat of the moment, after all. Never mind that an innocent stallion has been beaten and left suffering for the crime of panicking at a jewelry store window.
Definitely looking forward to more.
Yeah, all I can say, again, is excellent job on the exchange, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. Yeah, Radiance has the point in that the stallion she was talking to DID NOT deserve the force that was used on him, nor to be restrained for that much longer than regulations permitted. But, yeah, I can also see why the Commissioner would, unfortunately, take that stance. While that perspective is wrong in this case, he's just trying to make sure as many of his officers get home in one piece as possible. And, unfortunately, her resigning would mean she could NOT stick around long enough to help things change for the better. Still, something DOES need to be done and it will certainly be interesting to see how she handles this setback.
Definitely looking forward to more of this.
Sorry for the delay in replying, everyone! I've been busy the last several days, but now I've managed to steal an hour or two. Mega-comment incoming!
First off, thank you all for your kind words. I've actually been discouraged the past several days, and seeing your reactions to this piece have helped me feel quite a bit better! Stay tuned for more writing, as always.
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That's a great line! Unfortunately, not sure there's room for it: I tried to write Radiance as a little more self-aware than that. Still--pretty funny!
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Excellent point! I must admit, though, I didn't quite have that in mind when I started--I just wanted to show how upset Radiance was by having her vent to her roommates.
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Y'see, I was going to respond to this comment... but, y'know, chapter 3 kinda made this a moot point
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I will admit, the timing of Radiance's paranoia may have been a slight oversight--I think this scene was originally supposed to go a little later on in the story--but I think it still stands. For one, she's gotten an indication from the other rookies that, as a wise man once said, "the Policemare's code is more what you'd call 'guidelines' than actual rules." Given that information, she's suspicious that such an inconvenient piece of paperwork might be "accidentally" misfiled, thus making the problem go away entirely.
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I will admit, that's one thing I've been worried about. I've tried to make the story a little more complex than simply "people good, police bad"--for example, the chapter posted today, which explores the police's motivations--but everyone I've had read it so far says it works pretty well.
M E G A C O M M E N T
P A R T I I
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I will admit that Radiance not going directly to Celestia is a slight oversight as well. Yes, Twilight is still Celestia's student, so Radiance has a line of communication straight to the top, but, as we'll see later, doesn't quite feel comfortable talking to the Princess(es?) just yet. She'll get there, though.
Also, Comickook--the exact timing of this story will be revealed soon.
And IceStar: yes, the art is gorgeous! It's done by LiaAqila on DeviantArt. She works quickly, her prices are exceptionally reasonable, and she's currently taking commissions! You should head over there and say "hi!"
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That photo in particular is important to Radiance, as it's her with the two ponies who had the biggest influence on her choice of career: Night Light, who has worked as a security guard for her entire life, and Shiny, who showed her that she could achieve her dreams. The rest of the family showed up in other pictures, but this one in particular is near to her heart. That was totally the plan all along, yes it was. It's not just a band-aid over another plot hole, no sir. Always part of the plan.
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just to clarify the timing: this takes place about two years after the previous story. Radiance has successfully passed the Canterlot Police Academy, and this is her first job stright out of school. She's probably been on the job less than a month at this point. The "four days ago" comment in Chapter 1 referred to the beating of Kingfisher; that happened four days before we saw Radiance at her typewriter.
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Ach, I cannae take credit for th' accent. As I said in the A/N, I had extensive help from multiple users to get it right. I may try the accent again in a future fic, but, as I said, it was kinda difficult to nail down. Nevertheless, I'm glad that you enjoyed it!
In my head: Kingfisher and the other Crystal Ponies were functionally expats from the Empire: they lived in small farms up in the mountains, far enough away from the Empire itself to dodge whatever Sombra did. However, there are so few of them that they mostly remain isolated from the wider world, kinda like the Kirin in that respect.
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Thanks again for your kind words--and that's exactly right! As I said a little earlier in this comment, I wanted to show that the police aren't neccesarily evil, at least not in this story. The Comissioner, at the very least, values teamwork, cooperation, safety, and at least some form of accountability for his officers. However, these values tend to come at the expense of the criminals they bring in. He's not neccesarily heartless--but his love is reserved for his colleagues, not for the common pony.
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Funny you mention that, since she was already on my radar. I'm about to have a horse book that will be in need of a cover once I have the last story revised, and she was at the top of the list of artists I was looking into.
Also, as for this chapter the stallion does have some points here, and I don't read his actions as seeking to intimidate. I do believe that his heart is in the right place, and logically he's only looking out with the ponies he's tasked to take care of. But Radiance is right, she just needs some more concrete evidence. That was probably her biggest folly here, approaching without objective evidence beyond her word. Hopefully she can recover from this.
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Oh? You have a book coming out? That's awesome!
If you need a higher-res picture, I would recommend the artist I used for Celestia XVII, Celestia XVII-2, and The Sisterverse Social. She works in vectors, so she can probably do a picture that works a little better in print. If you're interested, send me a PM, and I'll send you her email.
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Yeah, just a buncha short stories with Canterlot related to 'em so far. Thankies.
Night Light's a stallion after my own heart when it come to coffee. I'll happily take it with any number of adulterations, but I love a cup of something I can sink my teeth into.
A good fallback position. Not quite what Radiance had in mind, but it's still protecting ponies. In all, fantastic scene between those two. You made the father-daughter relationship sing between two characters who've barely even been in the same room in canon.
And I do admire her thoroughness and precautions. Documenting everything is a great way to keep your rear end covered. Keeping tangible records of having documented it just as much. And, of course, when you know ponies who know ponies...
Definitely looking forward to seeing how the dust settles on this one.
Again, excellent job on this latest chapter. LOVED the work that went into the characterizations, exchange and future chapter set-up.
Yeah, Radiance's chat with Night Light (with both of them proving quite perceptive and Night Light being supportive enough to provide Radiance with a good fallback) was really good. And I DID like the extra precautions Radiance made with her report (even though she acknowledges that it was probably excessive) before writing the letter to Twilight (presumably to ask to talk to Celestia AND POSSIBLY Luna as well).
REALLY looking forward to more of this.
It's the issue Dash faced with the canon Wonderbolts: Do you stick to your dream in the hopes of fixing the flawed reality from within, or do you dismiss it as a lost cause? And we know what choice Rarity made with Blueblood...
Ah, irony.
Yeah, it's a shame Sheriff Worker Ant never rubbed off on him.
Fiance. The double-e version is the feminine. Unless Cadence is into that kind of thing.
Again, magnificent family interactions between characters who aren't normally family. And that includes Radiance's soon-to-be aunt-in-law. This is pretty much the best possible outcome for all involved parties who deserve one. And there's apparently more! Looking forward to whatever's left. Especially Twilight's reaction to having her big sister in town with her.
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Thank you again for your kind words. I'm now starting to think I should exclusively stick to stories about parents and children!
Regarding Sheriff Grasshopper--Funny story, actually. I initially chose his name as a referense to Hopper from Stranger Things, but it turns out that "Grasshopper" is cockney rhyming slang for "Police" ("Grasshopper" = "Copper"). fun little coincidence...
Regarding "Fiancee"--I've actually been meaning to rework that sentence slightly, as the wording was bugging me. Thanks for the reminder! It's now functionally the same, but has been changed to side-step that issue.
Thanks again for reading, and I always look forward to your comments!
Excellent job on the second-to-last chapter. Absolutely LOVED the work that went into the exchange, characterizations and final chapter set-up in all the right places. I am glad Celestia laid down the law on Kingfisher's assailants and I can definitely understand why Radiance didn't want to accept her job back all things considered. And, while I can respect the wanting to do things as much on your own merits as possible, I really liked Celestia pointing out that Ponyville has an up-and-coming law enforcement division. And, obviously, this is set JUST before Shining and Cadance got engaged (so definitely before Chrysalis at any rate).
At any rate, very certainly looking forward to the epilogue.
Not much more to say that hasn't been already. Sometimes you've gotta know when it's still worth it to try to fix a sinking ship and when to cut your losses and bail.
Interesting choice to skip over the mess and tell about the incident in retrospective.
A great high note to end on. Thank you for an excellent journey through hard questions and difficult choices.
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You're very welcome! I'm so glad you liked it
Out of curiosity do you have any more stories for your sister verse?
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Aside from the prequel, unfortunately not.
- MLP: FiM
- Adventure
- Drama
- Slice of Life
Three very special sets of sisters meet, for the first time, at the Sisterhooves Social. Their relationships will never be the same--to say nothing of Equestria.This is a cute universe, and I'm fond of it, but I have a hard time finding story concepts that sing to me--especially since I have several other long-term projects I'm working on at the same time.
Excellent job on this epilogue chapter. Absolutely LOVED seeing Bluebook helping out Kingfisher with that snooty clerk, especially with the points about how dismissing potential customers because of race is flat-out illegal AND covering Kingfisher's expenses.
Anyway, great work on the exchanges, characterizations and general wrap-up.
And this is a beautiful picture Of Radiance and the Crusaders to end the story on. And I can definitely understand you having too many other projects for any more stories in this universe.
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Ok I understand it hard to come up with stuff. The only thing I can think of doing is focusing on sunset shimmer and her brother sunburst. Maybe throw in her acceptance to the school her insecurities about not being the smartest and have her brother help her accept she does not need to be the best
It's great to see Officer Radiance reaching for high places once more!
HORSE RESOURCES!
Anyway, it's lovely to see that Radiance was able to stay in the field she loved. Both she and Celestia knows that what she does is vital and that if anypony can make khaki work, Radey can. Though, I'm surprised that the Royal Guard wasn't brought up as an option.
Bluebook is good and he should feel good. That is all.
Oh gosh, I really hope you do more. Sheriff Radiance has too much potential!
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I came this close to make this exact joke.
I always thought Serenade's mane was curled like Twilight's? Or did I interpret that bit wrong in your original story?
But yeah, this was definitely a well thought-out allegory, and a fitting return to the Sisterverse. I hope more is to come for this in the future, because this is definitely an underrated AU.
Ending on a defeated but hopeful note is the best way to end things
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You know... I've always been fond of Sunset and Sunburst as biological siblings... however, these stories tend to focus on the Mane 6, and I'm not entirely sure how to fit the two of them in. Also, I'd like to put a little bit of a twist on their relationship, somehow, more so than just "siblings." I'll have to think about it...
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That fair, How about that stellar flair: the mom is an old friend of twilight velvet and decides to visit her. For a twist Spitfire from the wonder bolts is the older sister to the two siblings. the running gag is that spitfire teasing sunset for having a crush on shining armor.
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So what you're saying is: Stellar Flare makes one of her infrequent visits to her sister Twilight Velvet, bringing her three kids along, much to the consternation of both Radiance and Twilight?
That could actually be a lot of fun! I'll toss it on the list and see what I can do...
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Awesome can't wait to read it.
Maybe throw in a little joke about sunburst having a crush on a starlight by his twin sister
A couple typos
and begin sorting through the bowls, putting them in matching stacks - *Began
her gut turning her gut to ice. - Kinda redundant. *Her gut turning to ice
Anyway, great story. I enjoyed it!