The screaming continued for long enough that Tracy’s ears began to ring. But however confused he was, it wasn’t enough to stand in place acting like an idiot. He looked pointedly away from the things he wasn’t supposed to see, fixing the other creature with an intense glare. “Look, I’m sorry if—”
She blinked, expression changing swiftly into a smile. As though he’d flicked a switch, and she hadn’t been bellowing at him moments before. “I’m sorry, I hope you’ll forgive my manners. I’m a little easy to startle, i-if you can’t tell.”
She approached casually, as though she wasn’t completely naked directly in front of a total stranger. Maybe this is a good thing. If I’m facing someone directly, then I don’t have to look at anything.
Tracy knew on an intellectual level that it shouldn’t feel weird at all. She was just an animal, right? It wasn’t like he’d ever felt vicariously embarrassed for farm animals, or the creatures of a petting zoo. But they never tried to talk to me.
“Y-yeah.” He retreated from her, until his rump was against the wall and he didn’t have anywhere else to go. “It’s f-fine, really. I was just—”
“Landlord said I should expect a new roommate,” she interrupted, clasping his hoof with both of hers and looking him over. It was hard to tell for sure, but it felt like she was staring at his… wings? Why was that so embarrassing? I’m not even supposed to have those! “I just didn’t expect you to come in through the back, he said I shouldn't go out to the vacant lot back there. Ooh, were you insect hunting?”
She flushed, letting go and covering her mouth. “Sorry, that’s probably insensitive. I shouldn’t repeat stereotypes.” She spun around, gesturing near the living room. There were several boxes there—the ones containing his gaming consoles and undersized television. “I guess you moved in during the night? Sorry, you’re probably just getting home from work or whatever. Do all bats work at night? No wait, that’s insensitive again. I’m sorry.”
Was Tracy’s mind going on him too, or did the horse seem just as embarrassed as he was? Like she was afraid of even a moment’s silence. I’m not going to look I’m not going to look I’m not going to look.
“I was, uh… just finishing my move-in,” he said lamely. But anything would probably help keep her from a nervous breakdown. “And yeah, I guess I am pretty tired.”
He walked past her, over to the front window. His last time in this room had been overwhelmed by many other things, but closer inspection proved he hadn’t been wrong after all.
“It’s daytime out there?” he asked, staring through the shutters. Hadn’t the sun just set? His mind reeled for a moment, trying to reconcile the evening he’d seen with what was obviously the light of morning.
“Uh… yeah.” She glanced briefly towards the kitchen, where something sizzled on a skillet. “I was just working on breakfast. And I probably shouldn’t let it burn, excuse me!” She darted past him, taking a spatula in her teeth and tending to her meal. French toast, by the smell of it.
Good thing I already ate. For all I know, eating anything here is like tasting anything from the underworld. One bite, and I can never leave. “I’m going to, uh…” He backed away again, towards the stairs this time. “I’m going to get some rest. It was nice to meet you, uh…”
She tossed the spatula aside, grinning back at him. “Roseluck! Sorry, I’d like to stay and chat. But I’ve got to get to work soon, and if I don’t eat I’ll end up snacking on the merchandise until lunch. Hopefully we can catch up later.”
“Y-yeah…” he said, finally turning for the stairs and darting up as quickly as he could. Which actually wasn’t very fast with four legs. He nearly tripped twice, catching a hoof and sliding along the wood.
At least the pictures online had been accurate. The upstairs had one larger bedroom facing the street—his, then a smaller bedroom and the shared bathroom on the other side. A bright rose was painted on that door.
Finally he got through the other side, slamming it shut behind him and slumping down to the floor with exhaustion. He remained there for a good few minutes, feeling his heart racing in his chest. This whole situation is impossible. I’m drugged, I’m hypnotized, I’m in VR…
All the rational explanations felt hollow to him now. His bare ass was on the carpet, how was he supposed to pretend he couldn’t feel it? So what do you do, Tracy? Give up now and go home? Give up your future?
More than just his future at Apex, if Discord was honest with him. Given everything else that had come true, that seemed like a safe assumption. Is it really that bad?
Tracy rose to his hooves again, moving cautiously to the open window. His disorientation faded a bit as he looked outside into the city’s entirely normal streets. An amber streetlight glowed through the slats, and a pair of headlights passed just outside.
Oh god, what would someone think if they saw me through there? At least his landlord had done him the decency of closing the shutters while moving everything in.
The order of it all was almost insulting, each box precisely stacked and every loose article of clothing folded neatly. And… washed apparently, if his nose was any guide.
How will I know if I’m properly dressed in the morning, living here? His entire outfit had turned into a half-vest and some almost socks, covering nothing and only making him feel more naked.
One night, and I can get the form to HR. How long would it take to get mail here, a few days? Once I get the verification, I can sleep in my car. I don’t have to come back if I keep paying.
Work had a shower, a gym, and everything else an aspiring engineer needed to never want to leave. All he had to do was use the services they provided, and this could be a… an embarrassing secret he never shared and pretended never happened.
Alright, Tracy, you’re doing this. A week, it can’t take more than that. Then you live in your car for three months, and you keep paying for this place in the meantime. The Devil doesn’t steal your soul and you don’t live in horse town.
Tracy barely even cared about the bedroom itself, but it was nicer than anywhere he’d stayed since his mother died. No black mold on the ceiling, a decently-sized walk-in closet, and a fresh mattress. He stared for a few seconds at the label, eyes wide with amazement and frustration. The Devil ordered a fucking ghost bed. What bizarro-world had he been trapped in where any of this made sense?
He didn’t do much to unpack, just moved the boxes down off his bed and searched through a few of them until he found what he was looking for: his bedding. It smelled freshly washed like everything else, though nothing could be done for the holes in the sheets and the lifetime of mysterious stains in the quilt.
Doesn’t matter. I’ve still got the sleeping bag for the car.
He settled his backpack by the door, then glanced briefly at his toiletries. No, I don’t care about that either. He could brush his teeth at work.
Tracy slept restlessly that day, which he’d fully expected. Sleeping on his back just didn’t seem to work, but a lifetime of instinct prevented him from getting comfortable any other way. He heard his new roommate passing his door several times during the night. He did his best to ignore it, resolving to purchase earplugs the next day.
Eventually his phone started vibrating with his work alarm, and he jerked upright. Crap, I forgot to adjust that. Before today, he’d been sleeping in an empty lot a few blocks from work. I’m going to be late.
He jerked out of bed, fumbling around in the groggy light until he found the outfit he’d left there—the same one he wore the day before, since he couldn’t be sure how anything else would work.
It wasn’t a simple matter of just slipping everything on—the vest was easy enough, but his stupid legs weren’t very cooperative. In the end, he had to resort to holding the sock in his mouth, pulling it down into place. It’s okay, nobody cares. You’re almost out of here.
He dragged the bag along behind him, not even trying to fight with the backpack today. He’d probably do something wrong, and it would come tearing off his back the instant he stepped outside anyway.
He held the stupid thing in his mouth, ignoring the unpleasant taste of half-oxidized rubber on the handle. It wasn’t quite so bad as “dirty socks,” anyway.
He stumbled down the stairs, nearly tripping twice on the smooth wood. He caught himself on lower floors only barely, holding himself in place with a narrow save with an extended hoof. Walking on four legs was awkward and stupid, but at least it was easy to stop from falling over.
He emerged onto the ground floor, turning to see three entirely naked people gathered around the kitchen table. They all turned to face him, and this time there were no screams of terror.
“Daisy, Lily! This is my new roommate! Whose… name I just realized I never learned. Why don’t you meet my sisters, roommate!”
The window behind them was entirely dark, with a few flickers of orange visible beyond. It seemed what was true in one direction was the same in reverse—his world and horsetown were direct opposites to each other.
He dropped the backpack, which landed with an unpleasant thump on the polished wood. “Tracy,” he said in his pre-coffee voice. “Sorry, I… late for work. No time to talk.”
How is everyone in this whole mad place naked all the time? Did I move in with a family of nudists?
“Oh, uh… bye then,” Rose said, her voice exasperated. “Have fun in the… vacant lot…”
Tracy ignored her, shutting the second door behind him, then practically galloping for the back. He stumbled out into the light, fighting back terror. What if it didn’t work, what if he emerged into the real world carrying his delusions with him? He’d be the Devil’s prisoner forever, unable to escape the nightmare.
His fears were in vain. He stumbled forward a few steps, and nearly fell over on his face. His mouth strained, as he struggled with the backpack his teeth didn’t want to lift anymore.
He kicked the door shut behind him, catching the bag in one hand and hurrying to his car. He’d still be late, but if he could get to work before the shift lead got there, he’d probably get away with it…
So time is "backwards"; he leaves for our daytime at ponyville nighttime. Helps make the bat-pony work.
Still, as much as Roseluck was trying not to be stereotyping, the whole "programmers work nights" implication (making the programmer a batpony) is ... :-)
Next chapter: Lets find out what's going to keep him coming into Ponyville, and not just staying in his car. Yes, Discord only needs him to keep paying rent, but it's heavily implied that both of them are someone else's pawns in a bigger game.
10142247
To be fair, there's a kernel of truth that every stereotype started from before becoming a counter-productive caricature of it.
I've been struggling not to be nocturnal ever since high school because school was so mind-numbing compared to programming that I'd stay up late getting the mental stimulation I craved, and that built a strong habit of procrastinating letting tomorrow come.
You'd think the ponies would notice that the scenes through a few of the windows ain't right. Or is that due to Discord? Either A: making it so they don't notice, or B: they do notice and know Discord's the "landlord" and so ain't concerned because it's basically "don't question
The Pink One, She Who Laughs LastDiscord"?Also I wonder what would happen if a pony goes through to our world? Do they turn into a human? A proper one, not the EQG sins against all that is sane? Many questions.
There’s those questions answered, I guess.
I wonder what form Discord takes on the pony side of the portal. Or whether the ponies know he’s a landlord. Or whether anyone would believe Tracy when he said Discord was his landlord. Or whether Roseluck also got some interesting terms in her lease.
I wonder how hard it will be to be to convince Roseluck to keep her shutters and the first-floor shutters closed at all times. That wouldn’t work if someone comes poking around the outside of the house, though; we’ll have to see whether the rest of the neighborhood actually exists or whether any human other than Tracey would have a reason to stop by.
Hopefully he doesn’t forget his lease, too.
Narrator: He didn’t.
More seriously, though, he probably does get away this time, perhaps with a warning, but I wouldn’t be surprised if making it to work in time despite the shenanigans in Ponyville doesn’t become a problem later.
Ah think this is yer best chapter yet! Yay!!!
This is an interesting development and I hope he manages to adjust to his new situation. I wouldn't be surprised if he simply tells the flower ponies about his contract with Discord. I'm wondering if all of the clothes he had with him also changed to suit his new body.
I wonder when she will learn the truth
My gosh dude you just started a story recently and here you are going all in on another :P
Well, looks like everything is nice and tidy legally (mostly). It wouldn't be a story if Tracy never goes back to Ponyville. So what will keep him going there?
10142317
I'm assuming Roseluck's lease is a bit more mundane than those of outsiders. As a subject of Equestria, she certainly has the protection of an authority that can deal (mostly) with Discord. No centuries of torment for her. Tracy, not so much I assume. Now, I'm wondering what sort of scheme Discord is running here. It certainly isn't to make a living as a landlord. And Roseluck doesn't appear to be in on it, either. I'm still on the fence whether he specifically targeted Tracy, Tracy got involved by sheer (bad) luck, or something in between.
So Discord arranged for the timeframes to be offset? clever. I wonder who Roseluck thinks she's bought a lease from? I'm pretty certain that it's not Discord, she faints at the sight of a bunny stampede.
10142291
I was under the impression that it was just Tracy's bedroom window that overlooks "his" world--the rest still overlook Ponyville as expected. At the very least, we know the living room window overlooks Ponyville from Tracy's initial first visit to ponydom, so it at least must depend on the window. So as long Roseluck and other ponies keep looking out the windows they're supposed to...
10142532
You're likely right in that Discord probably can't get away with quite as much on the Equestrian side, and even if he tried Roseluck probably wasn't under the same kind of time pressure as Tracy to sign whatever lease Discord might have presented, which makes getting away with questionable clauses more difficult.
Even then, I'm wondering whether there are any strange but unobjectionable clauses in there --- stuff like "Keep the south windows shuttered at all times" that might make a potential leasee go "huh" but wouldn't be a dealbreaker in and of itself. There's also the fact that Roseluck seems to think that the door Tracy entered through just leads to an empty lot, which hints that maybe there's something weird(er) going on than just a normal portal. Perhaps it was a recent change by Discord, or something specific to humans and/or Tracy.
What a "ghost bed"?
Came from Never The Final Word.
Presumably, this is a reformed Discord, so I wonder what Fluttershy would do if she learned.
But, this is Romance Slice of Life. I guess he hooks up with Roseluck and Fluttershy doesn't disapprove if she learns of this thing of Discord, after that happens...
Constant nudity, always a problem with florists.
Oooh
"Ghost bed"? It's just a standard cloud bed, nothing special...
So Roseluck is also a tenant, and Discord is just acting broker to the landlord? Tricksy. Wonder if she instinctively knows the "back lot" isn't what anyone else would consider such a thing, and the portal enchantment just helps keep the conscious from thinking too hard on it?
All the stuff so orderly-like is hilarious! Nopony would suspect Discord was involved!
Tracy. Trace See. Hmm, how will he explain his Cutie Mark? Only so much you can explain away through supposed culture.
Butt hey, plenty of time to practice learning restraint! Problem is, staring hard into the eyes is probably just as lecherous.
Keep going! ;)
10142882
Gotta give those flowers plenty of air and sunshine!
Not exactly the strongest first impression. Everyone in that house is in for interesting times in the near future, Tracy especially.
10142757
It's a name brand. A very high-end one at that.
10142616 Well, batponies are nocturnal, so sleeping all day in Ponyville is only expected.
10142973
Suspected that might be the case. Would have web-searched, but figured having the answer publicly posted would be better (and I didn't think to search-and-then-post).
I liked how in the story he has trouble sleeping with wings - the same thing would be a problem for pegasus too. I guess they all sleep on their stomachs, or their wings are stronger than I would think they would be.
If Roseluck isn't supposed to go out the back and the back in Ponyville is the front in Silicon Valley, where does the back in Silicon Valley lead to? Tracy has some exploring to do in the coming days once he stops freaking out.
Sisters? The Flower Trio has always been friends, by all evidence. But no matter - it's your story.
Never understood why this trope took hold. In your entire llife, have you ever seen a horse wearing clothes? No?
Then why would anybody be shocked to see a horse not wearing clothes?
10233775
I think that their innate magic project some sort of modesty aura that hides their hmm stuff
Gotta love how chaotic this is by everything being so orderly.
I think the concept of dirty laundry just might not exist in Equestria. Probably why Discord suggested finding a laundromat on Earth. Things probably get dirty but just don't express it on the equestrian side of the portal.
10265871
The most chaotic thing the Lord of Chaos could do is be ordinary
Oooo Come on just except your reality and do your job!
10265871
This way, no SDPD or FBI criminologists or forensic psychologists will ever be able to trace the issue back to
John DeDiscord. ♪♫Clever making him sleep in the day. No way for Luna to find him.
10738954
reminds me of a story where Discord drove Celestia crazy by hinting that he was going to prank her and then doing nothing.
Diabolical!
"Ponyville" actually, but the mix-up is understandable
ok, i've just got to post this:
also, i just remembered a short by Estee about someone with a talent for dimension-hopping, who got attacked by a vampire, and brought it into Equestria, where it was daytime.