On the longest day, of the thousandth year, the stars aided in her escape.
Then Nightmare Moon looked out upon the land that would soon be her empire, and found a world she no longer existed in. In a thousand years, she had been all but forgotten.
She could conquer, and continue to be hated. She could put aside her pride, and be redundant. Or, she could disappear, and fade into the glorious night.
AN: While Princess of Equestria takes place before this, neither are required reading for the other. Rather, they complement each other.
Chapters (1)
Well, now I want to read all about Nightmare Moon's adventures in Ponyville and her increasingly convoluted attempts at avoiding Celestia.
First I found this for you "Ruble had been cleared." [ Rubble ] Was hesitant to read this at first Anthro, Nightmare moon on a throne overlooking Equestria. I thought oh nuts another dead world ending. took a look and was pleasantly surprised. Different ending, story handled quite well. I really like the take on the nightmare. I don't think I have seen just this one before, well done
Imagine if this what episode 1 was like... :) This is so much better:)
10076976
I have enough stories on my plate right now. But I agree, it would be a fun story.
10076985
Thanks, fixed that.
Also, hadn't considered that it might evoke that image. I need a better description, but couldnt come up with anything. And thanks, this feels like one of the few original ideas I've had for writing. Most of my other fics I can point to sources of inspiration.
10077014
:)
Why'd you change the cover art?
10077077
Felt this worked better. The original was mostly a place holder and I forgot to fix it before I posted. Lol
Shall there be more to this tale? It is rather enticing and refreshing. It hadn't occurred to me that Nightmare Moon could have chosen to remain at the castle alone.
10077525
Maybe. Again, I have a lot of other stories on my plate right now that I want to finish. But I also would like to see where this story goes.
And on the other end of the spectrum, I can see Celestia lamenting how she has had to take care of everything herself, how she lost a student to unbridled ambition because she couldn't spend enough time to guide her properly, how the one after that nearly became a friendless recluse before Celestia finally noticed, how she's growing distant with her nephew who's becoming an aimless fop as a result, how her little ponies try to settle in more and more places that end up being dangerous and she can't help them all, how ponies end up haunted by nightmares but the dream realm is closed to her...
... but mostly, how she can't bring herself to face Nightmare Moon. Not again.
10077539
Very good. I look forward to the possibility of more.
I like this bit more realistic,mature take there on Nightmare Moon and exploring her character throught self reflection ,out of first person view and actually allow her to open up.Glad you decided to push on with Fluttershy idea,felt really natural and hey now you can continue this story sometime if you would like to. I would read it. I genuinly enjoyed it.It was a pleasant surprise among the many oneshots in featured right now which go nowhere or dont explore their own story elements themself.
10076976
Same
This fic....It's so good. I actually felt the emotions coming from the characters, especially Nightmare Moon. I really liked how you wrote the characters. And most importantly, I love this fic. Keep up the good work. I'm going to be keeping an eye on your stories from now on.
This rather depends on WHICH Nightmare Moon this is. Is she the possessed one? The one with a dark power that took on a mind of its own? The one infected with Dark Magic? Or just angsty Luna who threw a tantrum because she be jelly?
I'm guessing the last one, because the other 3 lack the capacity for self-reflection, given that they're basically outside agencies supplanting/suppressing Luna's mind.
Huh, a lovely piece. A story to make you wonder, which is always valuable.
10077824
Woooooo!!!! Angry woona best woona
This turned out very heartwarming. I would say that the could continue if you so wished but at the same time if left here it is a nice and wholesome place to end as well.
a rather sweet take on the Redemption of NMM. Hee Hee Hee, I might actually get along better with this version of Celestia than I thought as I too have a penchant for Pasteries and a sweet tooth the size of SWEETEN (I'll be here all week).
Interesting take on this. Why are they there, then, if this isn't to stop her? Did Celestia set them up to stop the Mare in the Moon, Nightmare Moon… who then didn't show up and Twilight felt very silly for spending the day before the Summer Sun Celebration freaking out, only for Celestia to then send her to fetch the elements after nothing happened?
> Like a flip had been switched
…?
10077553
I can see that too. Celestia, at least in this version, isn't ready to face her sister.
10077661
:D
10077674
Thanks. I have considered writing more, and it would be interesting to see how things would change, but that's not in the cards right now.
10077815
Thanks :)
10077824
I'm not really sure it matters. Regardless of the who and the how, she still returns to nothing. An emptiness so complete it cuts right through everything else she was feeling.
10077848
10077943
10078078
:)
10078511
My thought was that Celestia had expected for the girls to activate the elements and save her sister. When absolutely nothing happened, when Nightmare willingly lowered the moon, Celestia panicked, having no idea what was going on. So she gathered the girls and sent them in to at the very least try to retrieve the elements. The six of the embody the elements, weather they've become the bearers or not, and the elements are still vital to the safety of Equestia.
now I want to see the continuation of this story
10078587
You and everyone else. Maybe
Yes, I too would like a sequel. However, I'm not sure if I want a full blown novel-length story or simply small, individual chapters like this. I actually think the later would tell a much more compelling story. Regardless, well done.
Hm
Definitely worthy of a sequel if you care to write it. I’m honestly surprised this is the first time I’ve come across Nightmare Moon having an existential crisis.
You know, this story leads me to an insteresting headcanon regarding both seeming stasis of Equestria and dream realm being left uncontrolled during Luna's banishment.
Since dream realm is closed to Celestia, how could she keep ponies safe? My guess would be some kind of crude and inelegant solution, something that blanketed their dreams. It would make it harder for whatever predators are lurking there to attack them, but it'd also smother ponies' creativity to an extent, preventing them from drawing inspiration from their dreams.
10078542 Motivation and agency ABSOLUTELY MATTER, because in actual people THESE ARE THE PRIMARY DRIVERS OF BEHAVIOR.
Sheesh.
This was sad and nice at the same time. I look forward should you feel like continuing this AU.
turned out better due to fluttershy.
Let me just say, that cover art is quite horrifying.
At first when i read this I didn't notice the anthro tag so when i heard the usage of human body parts it threw me off lol mb I need to read the tags better. Though I'm not saying the anthro part was bad just that I didn't expect it. Anyways! I really really loved this fic.
I thought it was amazing and that this nightmare moon was a lot better than canon. I felt like she was more emotional and real as well as I could relate to her. She felt like a person ya know?
But also I loved that fluttershy approached her and offered kindness. The main 6 were there to get the elements, but instead, made a friend. I think the ending was very nice and you could absolutely leave it as is, but if you ever wanted to or felt like it the way it ended absolutely leaves room for a sequel. Maybe that was purposeful who knows except for you.
10079747
10078542
Alondro will always be an asshole, but I agree, if we were to follow that line of thought. I don't agree that that line of thought is relevant, however. Nightmare Moon is a very flexible literary device, as is most of the MLP canon. These characters were not developed by the show to a significant depth, nor did they need to be. We owe this entire fandom to that fact.
10079747
10080717
I agree that agency and motive matters from a character standpoint. However, I meant that it didn't matter in the context of the story. It doesn't matter how NIghtmare Moon came to be, only that upon her return to Equestria she had an existential crisis. If I do continue with this world, it would matter, as then it would inform her decisions and character development.
Im not a big fan of Anthro stuff but I did enjoy this one quite a bit. Good job!
10077553
.... Damn you. Damn you and your literary ear worm.
I am a big fan of Nightmare moon. And I loved this story. But could you perhaps change the references to "hands" to "Hooves." It really would read better. And of course, as the others have said, there simply MUST be a sequel to this. You are relieved of all other duties. Begin subsequent chapters immediately.
10082293
No. I wrote it how I wanted to. I wanted some physicality to the story, which I write better with hands involved.
It's an anthro story which, to me, means hands.
OMG, how did this slip my notice for a whole three days? This is wonderful. It's perfectly thematically appropriate to the show, addressing the problem of Nightmare Moon's return by the liberal application of friendship, starting with Kindness. And it's entirely plausible that Nightmare would observe the world around her as she was going from Ponyville to her castle, and see her ruined castle swallowed by the Everfree Forest, and with all of that fall into a state of despair upon realizing that she no longer had any purpose in this new world, a thousand years after the one she knew.
I really like this thing. I would love to see further stories of Luna adrift in this new world, gradually being given purpose and a sense of belonging by her friends until she felt able to approach her sister again. This possibility vibrates with potential; thank you for providing it to us. :)
10082241
Does that mean a sequel is in the making..?
10081358 Well, okay then, but with so many versions of NMM floating around, including 2 completely different canon versions, it would help to know how she came to be in THIS story. If she was invaded by a demon, for instance (the second main comic arc), it wouldn't really be her fault. If this was taken directly from the cold opening of Season 1, where the only statement we had was the story of Luna being jealous and giving in to envy, then it would make more sense she'd experience severe guilt if she'd been able to self-reflect.
Hmm, thinking of the comic for a moment... wouldn't it have been a nice tie-in if the same breed of entity which made NMM had also made Sombra? At least something would have had a connection in the awkward, jolting comic canon.
A good short story.
An interesting alternate take!
The biggest constructive criticism I can give would be to strongly consider dropping the Anthro aspect. Now, I actually don't mind a good Anthro story too much. Sure, it rarely is TECHNICALLY a good thing to me, but if it helps the writer think things through better so they can write it*, I'll take it over no story at all, or a poorly written one because the author was awkward or underplaying the physical motions of the characters because they couldn't "think horse shapes and body-language" enough. Here? There wasn't were a few hugs and such, but most of the action was verbal and objects that we don't see them interacting with in a very physically detailed way. Makes it seem a bit unnecessary. [EDIT] After reading the rest of the comments, specifically one of your replies( 10082318 ), I see you really do rely on human form that much in your head when writing to get the physical expressions of emotions right. 🤷 <-Shrug[/EDIT]
*Or, more rarely, helps the average reader envision things better in their head, but that is more rare I think, unless uses too advanced of equine anatomy terms (cannon for part of the leg, etc), for ones target sub-set of Bronies.
That last one could have been a GOOD thing even by modern standards. Just because there was only one combatant on one side of it doesn't make it an unjust war...
10086574
I appreciate the criticism. I have no issues writing ponies, but I specifically wanted to make this anthro as a way for me to better express the characters. It's subtle, yes, but helped me write what was in my head.
And Nightmare never said what she did was unfounded, or that she didn't have good reason. She just feels incredible guilt over what she did.
sequel ? please ?
This is an awesome and touching story
.
10082318
I noticed you have gotten similar comments already But I feel like I still should say my piece.
Personally the anthro tag was a turn off, something about it has always pissed me off. HOWEVER that was easy enough to ignore and like many others I agree you got emotional aspect as well as it possibly could. While I may have not personally felt anything, there was not a single moment that felt out of character here and that deserves praise.
Yeah I did not add anything to the discussion, but hopefully it makes you happy to know that something you did was worth someone elses time.
It'd also mean that Celestia would be one of, if not the, most ineffectual, inept, and neglectful rulers ever conceived.
I'm not sure if you, Luna, would be pleased or angered about that, since it'd highlight just how much you actually mattered, how much Celestia needed you - and there wouldn't be anything left for you to return to.
Hmm...
Any chance for a sequel, or following chapters? Because this looks like it could be so much fun, and what you got already is nice n sweet.
10139834 I agree. Anthro added nothing for me. You could change 'hands' for 'hooves' and 'arms' for fore-legs' in this story, and it would take away nothing of significance. And there is significance, as this is a good story.