Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season 4
By TDR
Plecostomus Twilight Sparkle,
Episode 2, Part 2
[?]
The landscape was broken.
There was hardly another word for the jagged and wiggling terrain that Twilight was standing on.
Looking around there were countless things wrong with this place. Trees growing out of clouds, the Maneterhorn mountain in the distance was spitting out hot chocolate and marshmallows like a volcano. The sky was pink with the moon high in the bright sky being bounced back and forth by clouds shaped like scantily clad mares playing with a beach ball. The ground itself rolled and undulated like something massive was moving underneath it without disturbing the sod, occasionally in the distance Twilight spotted a dirt spout like a whale or dolphin was swimming through the ground.
“Woof?” Rahs asked.
“What?” Twilight blinked looking back to see her brother looking around in confusion.” Oh... of course you got sucked into.... what ever this is too.”
“Ruff.” Rahs pointed out with a shrug.
“Yeah this is Discord's doing alright.... but where....” Twilight pondered.
“DISCORD!” bellowed a voice.
“That sounded like Celestia.” Twilight pondered and the pair rushed forward over the roiling checker board landscape coming up upon a rise that wasn't moving, but looked like a disco ball half buried in the ground. Sitting atop of it in a oddly mismatched looking throne made of plastic ninja swords sat Discord.
Before him at the edge of the disco ball hill stood two figures, a much younger, or at least less plump, Celestia, and Luna.
The pair of them were decked out in some sort of jewelry that Twilight recognized as the Elements of Harmony in a different form. Each of them wore three piece with Celestia wearing a crown like Twilight's Element became.
“Welly welly well, I was wondering when you were going to show up.” Discord grinned.”I somehow doubt it's to try and win me back however. Even if it is, that ship has sailed.”
Discord muttered the last and a model of the Enterprise D floats out of his hand drifting a little bit away from him before falling and crashing into the dirt next to his throne with a minor explosion.
“Hmm, guess they let Deanna drive again.” Discord shrugged turning his attention back to the two Princesses.
“You've gone too far with this Discord, return everything to how it is supposed to be.” Luna snapped.
“Oh you poor foal... this IS how everything is supposed to be.” Discord gestured. “Or did you forget that I was in charge of the entirety of 'Equestria' when your little ponies arrived here?”
“You gave that land to the ponies who were running from the Windigo, you have no right to take it back.” Celestia snarled.
“Celestia let me level with you here. I was in a fairly bad place when you first met me and our time together was quite delightful before it all came crashing down. As such I'm still willing to let your little ponies live in MY LAND, however, I am going to amuse myself however I feel like because this place is mine. If they don't like it they can move.” Discord snarled. “ Or not, because everything IN this land is mine too.”
“This is hardly the proper response to a break up.” Luna frowned.
“After what you did when your last date died. You don't get to talk about proper responses.” Discord snapped.
“Do not target us in this, we were not responsible for your actions in thine break up, nor our sisters. We simply stated thee was a twit, and let our sister choose her own path.”Luna growled.
Discord pondered a moment and shrugged.” Fair enough. But the answer is no, I'm not stopping. Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.”
“I was trying to be reasonable Discord, but ponies cannot live like this. I will ask you one more time to stop this madness.” Celestia snapped.
“Madness!?” Discord twitched standing up quickly enough that the throne flew backwards and took out a group of trees shaped like a triangle. An odd red X appeared in the air as all the trees crashed to the ground from the hit.
“THIS...”
Luna and Celestia frowned, the Elements starting to glow.
“...IS...”
A beam of rainbow light burst forth from the jewelry soaring through the air as Discord struck a dramatic pose.
“CHAOS!!!”
The cry reverberated around the land as the energy of the Elements wrapped around him exploding with a burst of white light leaving a statue of the draconequus mid pose like Twilight and Rahs had first seen him in the Canterlot Royal Gardens.
“Woof.” Rahs sighed.
“Yeah that happened pretty much exactly as I thought.” Twilight nodded as the world faded out.
[Back in the present]
“Right, so that's what the potion does, okay Rahs did you....... what the buck?” Twilight demanded as her head cleared from the odd fog of the potion's effects and she spotted the state of the library.
Rahs was laying on his back on the floor, with Sunset sitting on his chest.
Rarity, Spike, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie were all sitting on the couch with a big bucket of popcorn.
Sombra was buried under a bookshelf that had fallen over.
Zecora was simply gone.
The rest of the room was trashed and the source was readily seen as Trixie, who had Witch-Jack in a head lock, while Witch-Jack was flipping around the room trying to dislodge the mare all while chewing on Trixie's hat. Trixie in turn was gnawing on Witch-Jack's, hat trying to return the favor while shouting muffled curses as the pair smashed through a table.
“Applejack and Trixie both rushed over to check on Rahs when he fell over, completely ignoring me when I told them he probably got sucked into the potions effect.” Spike offered.
“The pair of them then got upset with each other checking on Rahs and started arguing which led to shoving and magic and then the pair of them just well... whatever this is.” Rarity offered.
“Sombra was in the wrong place at the wrong time and got knocked into the book shelf.” Fluttershy stated.”He's out cold.”
“And I made Popcorn.” Pinkie Pie stated.
“Woof?” Rahs asked from the floor.
“Good point why are you sitting on Rahs?” Twilight asked.
“Because those two are fighting over him, not fighting on him so this was the safest place. Besides he's comfortable.”Sunset shrugged.
“I know right, great place to nap.” Dash cackled. “So anyway Twi. How was the potion, was it sticky and salty?”
“It tasted like coconuts.” Twilight frowned.
“So it didn't taste like, baby batter, pale marmalade, pearl jam, penis colada, pole milk, ball barf, bonk juice, cuckoo spit, crack wax, cream, daddy juice, boy foam, nut butter, dong water, fish dip...” Rainbow Dash grinned as the fighting stopped and every pony looked at her.
“Flour water, fun gel, gentleman’s relish, happy trail mix, hot milk, jamba juice, chode nectar, nob slurry, throat yogurt, white honey, load, love liquor...” Fluttershy continued drawing even more stares, every ponies eyes widening. The shy mare meeped lightly and dove behind the couch after realizing what she said.
“No, it didn't taste a thing like, stallion chowder, erecto plasma, population paste, protean shake, buttermilk, fructis, clam sauce, rude glue, schlong jelly, worm gob, nizzle-drizzle, high fructose porn syrup, hemulsion, or willy milk.” Twilight concluded causing everyone's jaws to drop.
Twilight blinked a moment as she processed what she had just said. Rainbow Dash grinned even wider as she waited for the realization to hit.
“OH BUCK!! It is a pegasus thing!! I've got wings now craaaaaaaaaaaap!” Twilight wailed. “ I'm the element of depravity!”
“Calm down. Ah'm pretty sure you have some competition in that Twi.” Witch-Jack muttered.
“Applejack. It is not nice to bring up a ladies private interests like that.” Rarity scoffed. “ While I'm sure that comment means nothing to Rainbow Dash, must you be so insulting to poor Fluttershy?”
“Ah was talking about you.”Witch Jack snapped back.
“What?!” Rarity gasped.
“If ah got to explain to the Crusaders one more time about somethin they found under yer bed ah'm gonna sanitize yer whole place with some oil and matches.”Witch-Jack growled as Rarity turned bright red.
“Oooo, fire from the get go, we really are related.” Sunset grinned.
“Bork!” Rahs added.
“What right, get off my brother I've got two more of these bottles to go through. All that one showed me was when Discord got turned to stone.” Twilight sighed trying to force down her desire to go hide in the basement for a few years. She picked up the next bottle as Rahs whimpered about the stupid connection, as she downed it.
HAAAT FIGHT!
This is probably the most logical argument in this chapter.
sunset u also related to twilight since she date your half sister grandson
Cant stop snickering
Think that is a thing somewhere around this site.
Thank you for confirming that it is a pegasus thing to make sexual innuendos
i.imgur.com/3qY9Wkj.jpg
I think there really had been a episode where she was in command. If so, she's gotten better
The sisters turning Discord to stone is about what I expected. LoL for everything else.
But what happened to Zecora?
Catpone Sunset confirmed!
And nobody was surprised
Um...why are you publishing chapters as new entirely differently stories?
That’s a new one......
Lol
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Each Season is getting its own story.
...yeah you are definitely gonna end up on Cadance's shipping chart with a thread to Rahs
Isn't family fun
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She was smart and left
well~ haven't heard that one.. others I haven't heard in years
Deanna. Her name is Deanna.
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Yeah, be careful with her, she's got common sense
Under the bed is the last place you should stash your smut. Everyone knows it's the go to and least secure. Put it in a safe or say you did and put doodles of porn in there. Considering the CMC though.... I don't think even the working Vault-tec vaults would be a deterrent. More like probable cause.
This was frickin hilarious!
Windigo
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Better be Deanna, because its a horrible low blow otherwise.
As Harry is finding out.
Still thats what you get with messing with The Firm.
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It would be better to tell them everything at once, so Applejack does not have to answer any more awkward questions.
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in command she's fine. She was actually in the drivers seat in the movie.
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I'm not i'm just hitting the new chapter button not new story button.
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Can't wait to see how she hold the court with human's common logic.
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The Element of Debauchery has already been removed from this site.
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Wait, we have common sense?
I was not aware of this
Well, there goes Applejack's family tree.
10048291 Apparently, every ones but mine
Thats an image...
(Censored)
(Censored. Censored censored BANANA BREAD censored)
Buks!
Alright, flashback time! So, same as the main timeline, or all knew things showing a different villain? And how will this 'verse Tree of Harmony work out?
Well, given the number of wars and major events, that really doesn't narrow it down as to what is going on.
Ah, Hi Discord! So we will be getting that at the very least... and also skipped over the whole NMM thing.
Still prefer Canterhorn.
Okay, so Dream Dog at least comes along for the fun.
Hey now, Celestia isn't 'plump', Mrs. Cake is plump, Celestia is 'well rounded'.
Okay, nice one story.
Hmmmm, Starswirl just tossed the Sirens through the portal, or did he just break up with Aqua?
Oh boy... yeah we all know what's coming....
Very well played story, Well played indeed.
Eh, can't argue with that one.
So, watching the show of Twilight reactions, or what happened with the Harem Wannabe's.... given the lack of AJ on the couch... yeah, watching the wannabe puppy lovers having fun.
And yeah, what did you actually expect Twilight? I'm blaming Trixie. Though, how'd Sunset end up on Rahs?
Giving him the advanced course of 'living in Ponyville'. Not too late to change your mind about moving there....
Proof the Pinkie is the smartest one in the group.
Well, can't fault her logic.
Reminder that RD would totally screw Rahs if he wanted, just because RD.
You had to go there story....
Oh right, this running joke.
Well then......
Well then.... can't let them show up Book Horse in knowing words.
..... Or this........
Okay then...... once again story.... Well Played!
I'm sure Cadance would be MORE then happy to handle that if you asked AJ.
Speaking of, yeah none of you are even a tithe of what Princess of Kinkyness can do.
Hey, it got you godhood, so don't go bitching that much.
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And the second time she was in the drivers seat, she crashed the Enterprise E into another ship.
Dude here's a challenge for ya you have to find 2 moments filled with pegasi or Griffin's that are totally inappropriate for this kinda rant and you have to chain it till your outta ideas and then figure out how to salvage the situation
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Is it me or can you imaging rarity living with sunset right now or then gossiping about the best ways to screw over the canterlot snobs
Hahahahaha I was thinking of that as well
You used "boy foam" twice.
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Also "nut butter"
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She was ordered to ram the Scimitar.
Most lovely Pegasus traits
Mares just wanne have fun ~♡
Here we go... Another load of white goodness
Do not turn the robot voice on at the sexual innuendo part you will die of laughter
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Too late.
That explains so much.
I love Pegasus innuendos ♡
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Most fun logic
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Snickering,giggeling,laughting
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Just less kicking in a Pit to collect dirt and water.
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And everyone mature loves it
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She did the smart thing, probably sleep it off in the bedroom.
The innumerable innuendo string is probably mot favorite running gag here 👍
Should the potion magic not also effect Shining Armor? Spike as a dragon might be immune or incompatible but Shining Armor is a pony like Twilight.
With Zecora testing it, it isn't a godhood only thing.