This chapter took an...interesting turn. Not a bad one, just not one I had been expecting.
I am aware that there are the sex and fetish tags in this story, so I expected there would be stuff like that, just not the way it went. First off, I enjoy the way this started. The first chapter gave me the impression that The Sirens had broken up, I'm glad I was wrong about this. This shows that even after Adagio had failed, Sonata and Aria still care about her. It makes a lot of sense Aria would be the one who comes and checks on her, she was obviously the more direct one out of the three. Her reaction to Adagio's living situation, and particularly her reaction to Adagio's scars, feel very real and in character for her.
Aria then reveals she had the idea of giving Adagio a pet to give her meaning in life, which is a very fair assumption and a legit working method in real life for people who show sings of depression and suicidal tendencies, there are emotional support animals for a reason. I'm just slightly confused on how exactly Aria set up this appointment. If she had called the place and Fluttershy just happened to work there, that makes sense. But I'm getting the suggestion that Aria set it up with Fluttershy personally, which is what bothers me. Are the mane seven okay with Aria and Sonata now, or is it just with Fluttershy? Either way, will other members of the mane seven be important somehow later? A bit of clarification on this relationship would be appreciated.
Now this is when things get a little wonky.
Aria drops off Adagio at the pet store, which I find a bit strange. She knows at this point that Adagio sees no meaning in life and no point in doing anything, so why would she settle on just watching her enter and then leaving? If she doesn't trust her not to just enter and then leave, wouldn't it make more sense for Aria to go in with her? though I do think that could be blamed on naivete, Aria does not seem like a naive person.
Fluttershy workng at a pet store makes sense and is entirely in character, her interactions with Adagio is what I feel is a bit off. Fluttershy having a bondage/ master slave fetish is something I've seen done before, it also isn't too strange for her to have these fetishes. But I feel like she was too...forward? Confident? Fluttershy may be kind, but she is also kind of a scaredy cat. Adagio may be human now, but Fluttershy would be justified to still be a bit afraid, if not worried, especially considering it's Fluttershy. I might believe that Aria had convinced her Adagio was no threat, but there's not really a lot of reason for her to trust Aria either.
Her forwardness with flirting with Adagio is also a bit off, she seems very confident, which is not at all Fluttershy. She might be different when it comes to sex and sexual related things, but that does not seem like something she'd be with someone she really doesn't know, certainly not an ex-enemy. Adagio's willingness is...believable, honestly. Her will is broken and her life means nothing, she doesn't have much of a reason to care about anything. But I still feel she'd be somewhat more resistant, especially when it comes to sexual stuff, she seems like she'd be a dominant. Though if she's a switch it makes sense, but I just don't feel like she'd trust someone who kind of took away what she was. At least not with something like letting her put a collar and stuff around her, she might not really care about much anymore, but she doesn't seem stupid.
Everything after that is fine, it fits the rest of the theme you've been putting so far. With the exception of two things. The first being that Adagio claims to never have dated, never. Out of the centuries she's been on the earth, the hundreds of humans she's met, how curious and bored she must have gotten at times, she never once tried dating? Ever? That just sounds unrealistic, though I guess not entirely out of the realm of possibility if she believes herself to be far superior to humans and that they aren't even worth her effort. The other issue is the fact that she didn't get a pet, which was kind of the whole point of her going there. I get that it set up the whole pet play thing, which I don't mind, I can like pet play. It also served the purpose of giving Adagio a reason to live, in a sort of roundabout way. So it kind of all worked out, actually better because now she has Fluttershy caring for her. But Aria is still expecting Adagio to have some kind of pet, though I assume this will be explained somehow in later chapters.
Over all, this story is progressing interestingly. It seems to be both a story that does very kinky sexual story, along with being a redemption story. Which I've never seen done successfully, but this one seems to be doing fairly well so far. I'm interested to see where this goes.
9727009 You make a good point about Fluttershy. My co-author Zervon Tora and I spoke at great length about the character we wanted Fluttershy to have. We agreed that in general, EG Fluttershy is not a timid scaredy cat. With the exception of two examples, one being in EG1 when mean Sunset is bullying her against the lockers and two, in Rainbow Rocks when Snips & Snails chase her with the light when they sing "Shake Your Tail", EG Fluttershy is shown to be far more confident and self assured than her equine counterpart.
Examples are when Mr Cranky had her do the math thing in front of the whole class, teaching Sunset to drive, calming Twilight in Friendship Games and with RD on the rollercoaster in Rollercoaster of Friendship, plus she stood up to Vignette in Me, Myselfie and I.
Another reason for her confidence was the fact that she was in her environment. In the pet store surrounded by animals she was the queen of her kingdom, so to speak. Aria did call ahead, which happened 'off screen', so she was forewarned. The fact that she ended up being a pet rather than getting one will be addressed in the next chapter.
The reactions of the main cast will be addressed in upcoming chapters. The main cast are paired off with each other and there will be an 'interlude' chapter that brings the main cast in, just as there will be one such chapter with Aria & Chestnut and Sonata & Wallflower. In fact, one of the main cast's reactions will play a huge part in the story coming up.
I really hope you continue to read and enjoy the story, and I continue to look forward to your comments.
Hmm, Fluttergio, or Adashy, I can't pick a pet name for this pairing. *rimshot*
Speaking seriously, I was a bit worried about the length of the chapter: 8000+ words is, like, four times the size of last chapter.
But, this was a decent chapter nonetheless. I'm not someone who cares much for fetishes, but I give credit where credit's due, this fetish has a point in the story.
Keep up the good work, I'll see how things go from here.
P.S.: is Sonata coming next chapter? Just curious.
I think pet play makes perfect sense as a kink for Fluttershy. Her shyness seems to never include her relationship with animals, where she is always in charge of the relationship. It seems perfectly natural to me that as soon as she sees Adagio as a pet, Fluttershy is able to deal with her from a position of leadership and confidence.
Also, maybe I'm reading too much between the lines, but Aria didn't really intend for Adagio to get a pet at the pet store; she was really knowingly setting Adagio up with a Dom who would take control of her and get her life on track. At least that's how I read it.
Loved the update. I'm excited to see what comes next.
9727276 Well, Aria did intend Adagio to get a pet, what happened was just a very happy accident. You are right, in that where animals are concerned, Fluttershy is far from shy. In her space, she is the queen, as it were. Plus I don't see EG Shy as being all that shy anyway.
Okay, I like where this is going so far. Keep up the work my friend.
This chapter took an...interesting turn. Not a bad one, just not one I had been expecting.
I am aware that there are the sex and fetish tags in this story, so I expected there would be stuff like that, just not the way it went. First off, I enjoy the way this started. The first chapter gave me the impression that The Sirens had broken up, I'm glad I was wrong about this. This shows that even after Adagio had failed, Sonata and Aria still care about her. It makes a lot of sense Aria would be the one who comes and checks on her, she was obviously the more direct one out of the three. Her reaction to Adagio's living situation, and particularly her reaction to Adagio's scars, feel very real and in character for her.
Aria then reveals she had the idea of giving Adagio a pet to give her meaning in life, which is a very fair assumption and a legit working method in real life for people who show sings of depression and suicidal tendencies, there are emotional support animals for a reason. I'm just slightly confused on how exactly Aria set up this appointment. If she had called the place and Fluttershy just happened to work there, that makes sense. But I'm getting the suggestion that Aria set it up with Fluttershy personally, which is what bothers me. Are the mane seven okay with Aria and Sonata now, or is it just with Fluttershy? Either way, will other members of the mane seven be important somehow later? A bit of clarification on this relationship would be appreciated.
Now this is when things get a little wonky.
Aria drops off Adagio at the pet store, which I find a bit strange. She knows at this point that Adagio sees no meaning in life and no point in doing anything, so why would she settle on just watching her enter and then leaving? If she doesn't trust her not to just enter and then leave, wouldn't it make more sense for Aria to go in with her? though I do think that could be blamed on naivete, Aria does not seem like a naive person.
Fluttershy workng at a pet store makes sense and is entirely in character, her interactions with Adagio is what I feel is a bit off. Fluttershy having a bondage/ master slave fetish is something I've seen done before, it also isn't too strange for her to have these fetishes. But I feel like she was too...forward? Confident? Fluttershy may be kind, but she is also kind of a scaredy cat. Adagio may be human now, but Fluttershy would be justified to still be a bit afraid, if not worried, especially considering it's Fluttershy. I might believe that Aria had convinced her Adagio was no threat, but there's not really a lot of reason for her to trust Aria either.
Her forwardness with flirting with Adagio is also a bit off, she seems very confident, which is not at all Fluttershy. She might be different when it comes to sex and sexual related things, but that does not seem like something she'd be with someone she really doesn't know, certainly not an ex-enemy. Adagio's willingness is...believable, honestly. Her will is broken and her life means nothing, she doesn't have much of a reason to care about anything. But I still feel she'd be somewhat more resistant, especially when it comes to sexual stuff, she seems like she'd be a dominant. Though if she's a switch it makes sense, but I just don't feel like she'd trust someone who kind of took away what she was. At least not with something like letting her put a collar and stuff around her, she might not really care about much anymore, but she doesn't seem stupid.
Everything after that is fine, it fits the rest of the theme you've been putting so far. With the exception of two things. The first being that Adagio claims to never have dated, never. Out of the centuries she's been on the earth, the hundreds of humans she's met, how curious and bored she must have gotten at times, she never once tried dating? Ever? That just sounds unrealistic, though I guess not entirely out of the realm of possibility if she believes herself to be far superior to humans and that they aren't even worth her effort. The other issue is the fact that she didn't get a pet, which was kind of the whole point of her going there. I get that it set up the whole pet play thing, which I don't mind, I can like pet play. It also served the purpose of giving Adagio a reason to live, in a sort of roundabout way. So it kind of all worked out, actually better because now she has Fluttershy caring for her. But Aria is still expecting Adagio to have some kind of pet, though I assume this will be explained somehow in later chapters.
Over all, this story is progressing interestingly. It seems to be both a story that does very kinky sexual story, along with being a redemption story. Which I've never seen done successfully, but this one seems to be doing fairly well so far. I'm interested to see where this goes.
9727009
You make a good point about Fluttershy. My co-author Zervon Tora and I spoke at great length about the character we wanted Fluttershy to have. We agreed that in general, EG Fluttershy is not a timid scaredy cat. With the exception of two examples, one being in EG1 when mean Sunset is bullying her against the lockers and two, in Rainbow Rocks when Snips & Snails chase her with the light when they sing "Shake Your Tail", EG Fluttershy is shown to be far more confident and self assured than her equine counterpart.
Examples are when Mr Cranky had her do the math thing in front of the whole class, teaching Sunset to drive, calming Twilight in Friendship Games and with RD on the rollercoaster in Rollercoaster of Friendship, plus she stood up to Vignette in Me, Myselfie and I.
Another reason for her confidence was the fact that she was in her environment. In the pet store surrounded by animals she was the queen of her kingdom, so to speak. Aria did call ahead, which happened 'off screen', so she was forewarned. The fact that she ended up being a pet rather than getting one will be addressed in the next chapter.
The reactions of the main cast will be addressed in upcoming chapters. The main cast are paired off with each other and there will be an 'interlude' chapter that brings the main cast in, just as there will be one such chapter with Aria & Chestnut and Sonata & Wallflower. In fact, one of the main cast's reactions will play a huge part in the story coming up.
I really hope you continue to read and enjoy the story, and I continue to look forward to your comments.
Dusk.
Hmm, Fluttergio, or Adashy, I can't pick a pet name for this pairing. *rimshot*
Speaking seriously, I was a bit worried about the length of the chapter: 8000+ words is, like, four times the size of last chapter.
But, this was a decent chapter nonetheless. I'm not someone who cares much for fetishes, but I give credit where credit's due, this fetish has a point in the story.
Keep up the good work, I'll see how things go from here.
P.S.: is Sonata coming next chapter? Just curious.
I think pet play makes perfect sense as a kink for Fluttershy. Her shyness seems to never include her relationship with animals, where she is always in charge of the relationship. It seems perfectly natural to me that as soon as she sees Adagio as a pet, Fluttershy is able to deal with her from a position of leadership and confidence.
Also, maybe I'm reading too much between the lines, but Aria didn't really intend for Adagio to get a pet at the pet store; she was really knowingly setting Adagio up with a Dom who would take control of her and get her life on track. At least that's how I read it.
Loved the update. I'm excited to see what comes next.
9727276
Well, Aria did intend Adagio to get a pet, what happened was just a very happy accident. You are right, in that where animals are concerned, Fluttershy is far from shy. In her space, she is the queen, as it were. Plus I don't see EG Shy as being all that shy anyway.
9727274
Sonata will be in an upcoming chapter, as will the main cast
9727316
Got it.
interesting plot for the second chapter this got me inspired and hope that this can give me an idea for my story.
9737246
Oh? Planning a pet play story?
9737466
just a pinch
9737922
Can I get details in a pm, promise I won't tell anyone