AhhhahahaHHH I finally found a story with the silent king in it hahahahahahahaha

Hy 40k yaeee haaaa

Hmmm. Interesting topic for a displaced story.

Unlike the blocky skeletal forms of traditional Necron units the Silent King was described as being almost organic in appearance, though I kept a few things from overlords, and from scraps and hints in the lore, plus a few long forum discussions, I elected to use a nearly gray faded purple heavily accented with dull gold as the color pallet.

A bit too big of a run-on sentence. Try shortening it. As for the rest of the chapter, it's good, just needs a bit more meat and polishing. Just between you and me, though, I'd recommend staying far, far away from the usual trope of conventions. It's just far too cliche, and you're not typically likely to get any traction with the description that kind of beginning entails.

I'd recommend just making up Displacers that

A: Fit Midnight/Witching Hours rules

And B: Are unique and have a reason to displace someone away from a convention.

I myself have made Trader, the Merchant's daughter, as well as a few others. Anyways, I'll be keeping an eye on this one. Do feel free to shoot me a PM if you need any tips, by the by. I've been in the Displaced Story genre for at least 5 years, and writing in general for more than that, so if you want advice or help, don't be afraid to ask.