Rainbow Dash always thought she'd be ready for anything. She always thought she was too brave for anything to truly scare her.
But now, in this hostile and dark town, with a broken wing, Rainbow Dash will know the meaning of true terror.
Can she survive being Hunted?
IMPORTANT NOTE: This has a T rating only because I don't want fans 12 or under to get nightmares.
The one I had that I based the story off of was terrifying, even for me, and I'm Age of Majority. So yeah.
Prereader: N/A
Cover Art: N/A
Based off of a dream I had.
Chapters (3)
This is amazing so far, I can't wait to read more. It sure had my heart racing and can't wait to see how the story turns out.
Wow, just wow. This is honestly one of the scariest things I have read, and I'm not scared easily. I hope everything turns out good in the end. I can't wait until the next chapter! Also, what are the creatures around there and what did you base the story on?
9256362
Thanks for commenting!
I based the story off of a dream I had.
The creatures are basically famous slashers like Jason, Scream, and Freddy Krueger, but in my dream, they were quite literally demons chasing me with machetes, mostly, and one witch, whom was featured in this chapter.
9256404
That must have been an intense dream! That's pretty cool that they are based off famous slashers, I never would have thought of that! Good work. 👌👍
Damn, a cliffhanger anyway it's pretty good, nice job.
9257131
Thanks!
Me and you have very different dreams. I once had a dream about a penguin on skis while singing this-
9257748
Wow. That..
I have no words.
9257748
Clearly those penguins are off to seize the means of production.
As for this story:
9257791
Thanks.
OH SHIT THAT'S SPOOKY
This is amazing! I'm impressed!
(Who were you in the dream? Had it always been Rainbow Dash, or was a change made for the purpose of this fic?)
She was in what seemed to be a massive atrium of sorts, which reminded her of the main room in the Castle of Friendship. There were banners of some sort, hung from the ceiling, all of which had an abstract design on them.
'Of sorts' is used twice, so I personally would recommend a slight change.
Rainbow got up carefully, not wanting to bother her already-broken wing, and was immediately hit with a rushing sensation. She leaned against the barricade, waiting for it to pass.
Why did she get the sensation?
Looking around to make sure no other unwelcome surprises lay in wait, she cautiously got up. She walked quietly to the base of the stairs, before climbing them and sticking her head over the top.
Explain here that her motivation was to find an exit without making a loud noise (The result of possibly dismantling the barrier), instead of describing her escape attempt a few paragraph later.
Also, why didn't RD try to escape the night before, instead of falling asleep?
She turned slowly and saw the being that had been whispering to itself a few metres away from her tail.
I find the fact that she turned slowly very cliche. Most would whip around immediately with parinoya. Something to keep in mind.
9257748
Okay, sure, why not.
I hope that you don't mind my edits! I really do like this story, and what it to be the best it can be! I'd love to be your personal editor, if you'd like, but you're allowed to decline, if you wish! Please think about it!
9282599
It was a ponified story, so I dreamed it as myself and then wrote it as a ponyfic.
9282640
Cool.
9282617
Flugel, read the first paragraph again. The rushing sensation is a result of her headache, and I specifically stated that she woke from her exhausted sleep. Remember, she's been running for a long time from the thing chasing her outside.
Why would she take the risk of getting ambushed by the thing outside and dismantle the barricade? She was getting chased, and it might've stayed at the entrance, trying to get in. Unlike most cliche horror characters, Rainbow has common sense, and won't put herself in danger.
As for your other points, thanks for bringing them up. I'll edit them.
9282649
I didn't think of it like that. Thank you.
9282625
I have a possible series coming up, so I'll need one. I'll take your offer.
9282673
Sounds good!
9282711
I need to find a second prereader, a cover artist, and then I'll begin writing it.
9282733
Oh, I'm first prereader, wonderful!
I'd love to help with your art, but honestly, i suck, so yah.