Words
Parting
By Wanderer D
o.0.o
The assembly hall was packed. All students and staff had gathered to hear, and condemn, Sunset Shimmer.
From Octavia Melody—looking at the podium with cool and detached (and calculated) indifference—to the jeering and chattering of Daisy, Lilly Valley and Rose; to the silent, angry judgement of Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.
Row after row of students, all barely holding back their eagerness to accuse, and bring Sunset to justice. For a week, the whole student body had argued and debated in between the fights caused by the MyStable profile which had exposed all their secrets, on how to handle Sunset when the truth came out.
And finally, the time had come. Not because any of them had absolute proof of her guilt—not that they needed it, it was fairly obvious—but because Sunset herself had summoned them all, promising to put a final lid on the case.
How she would confess was a matter of constant discussion. Some, like Trixie, argued that Sunset would accuse someone else. Easy way out. Others thought that she would beg for forgiveness, promising to never do it again, and of course each and every one of them imagined themselves the heroes of the story.
Lyra would listen to Sunset beg, then—in an act of indisputable grace and nobility—she would lean down, extending a hand to help her up. "If you promise, I will believe you, Sunset Shimmer," she would say, and the students around them would melt and admire her eternal generosity.
Rainbow Dash closed her eyes, imagining herself stepping in front of the bullies that would surely rush to attack Sunset. She would hold them back, then glare down at the girl who had dared betray her. "One last act of loyalty, from me to you, Shimmer," she would say, "so you never forget who the better person is. I did this for you. One last time. Now go away."
She would feel the pats on the back from her friends, and glower down anyone that would dare attack Sunset after she had her say.
Trixie would use her magic to hogtie Sunset, and she would dismissively wave Bulk Biceps to pick Sunset up and throw her in the trash. The whole of Canterlot High would chant her name and carry her on their shoulders. That would teach the interdimensional hag to not take Trixie's crown next time.
Each student was the undisputed hero of their own narrative. Righteously vengeful, or saintly in their forgiveness. Heroes who knew right from wrong; who would act ethically and earn the praise of their friends and peers.
Heroes who, knew that Sunset would never repent, not really, but they would still prove to be the better person in the end.
The hall quieted down when the door to the side creaked open. Sunset stepped through, and the hush that followed her entrance was so thick it could be cut with a knife.
o.0.o
Sunset's eyes roamed the hall, looking for sympathy.
She found none.
Taking a deep breath, she pressed her hand onto her chest. A few students frowned. Had there been a light? A slight glow of some sort?
Sunset stumbled, but caught herself on the wall. She visibly gulped and slowly walked forward, the weight of a thousand eyes on her. When she reached the base of the stage, she hesitated.
"Get on with it!" a voice shouted. It sounded like Pinkie.
Sunset bit her lip. No, it couldn't be Pinkie. She wouldn't be that cruel. Not now… then she remembered where she was and chuckled. They couldn't know.
Slowly, her hand slid down from the wall, relinquishing its purchase, and she slowly made her way up the short staircase. The strength of her legs seemed to give at the last step, and she stumbled again, hitting the stage with her hands and knees.
Laughter rumbled through the assembly hall. There was no one there to help her up. Her head turned, against her will, to look down at the crowd. On the front row were her friends. The only ones she had ever known in this world.
They looked at her without pity. Their eyes betrayed that there was no sympathy for her plight. For how much that fall might've hurt. Perhaps the one that hurt the most right then was Fluttershy's small smirk.
No doubt, it had brought back memories of the many times Sunset had made her fall. All in all, she could hardly blame any of them.
Among jeers and chuckles and more calls to "get a move on", she struggled to her feet, then finally reached the microphone. She balanced herself, locking her legs into position so she wouldn't fall. The microphone stand was thankfully sturdy enough to help her balance.
"H-hello, thanks for coming."
"Just confess already!"
"We know it was you!"
"Don't thank us, bitch!"
"Just say whatever and get the hell out of our school!"
"Go back to your world!"
Sunset closed her eyes. "I want to apologize."
The microphone whined, making people cringe and shout more, so she moved it a little, and repeated from a better distance: "I want to apologize."
Slowly, the shouts faded as the students looked on curiously, wondering what she had to say.
"For the last week, I have tried to convince you all that I am not Anon-a-miss," Sunset said breathlessly. "I-I thought… I thought I had been forgiven, you see…"
Below her, Fluttershy shifted and Pinkie frowned, her eye twitching.
"I thought… that what I had done before was… water under the bridge…" she smiled tiredly, "a cloud in the breeze, as pegasi would say."
Carefully, she dragged a hand down her face. "I did so much damage to you. I hurt you all so much. I thought at the time that there was no place for me that I didn't forge for myself. I thought I could manipulate you all. I did. Back then, this wasn't home to me, but a stepping stone for some stupid plan I had in mind." She coughed into the back of her hand.
"I-I did h-horrible things," she said, "I broke friendships, and I.. I-I just…" she shook her head, taking a deep breath.
There were mutterings from the crowd as slowly they forgot their anger and daydreaming. Sunset's voice was soft... hesitant. It didn't carry the usual strength and assurance it had before, even when she had swore she wasn't anon-a-miss.
Even when she lied.
"I wanted to leave it behind… to be a better person… to not be a monster again."
Some students exchanged glances. Was this where she would confess?
"I thought you had forgiven me… despite all the horrible things I did… a-and I just took it, this second chance I thought I had. This forgiveness I thought you'd gifted me with, despite my failures and my hubris and my machinations."
Sunset swayed, but her balance held.
"I was very happy."
Some people in the audience shifted uncomfortably.
"This doesn't sound like a confession," Daisy whispered to Rose.
"I-I don't have…" Sunset licked her lips, "In… back home, Tartarus is a real place, where they send those that have committed unforgivable crimes and are unrepentant." She smiled. "We have no idea what's beyond however… green pastures? A great library?"
Pinkie was now twitching uncontrollably, eyes wide, unable to say anything as the others looked in concern.
"Anyway," Sunset said into the microphone, which produced a loud rumble when she leaned forward more than she apparently intended, "we do have a-a way, to atone… those that-feel remorse, but cannot be forgiven."
The last word was a harsh whisper, and Sunset braced herself on the podium, her head leaning forward. She chuckled. "I-we… usually it's done after a speech. N-not before."
She looked down at the assembly of students, some confused, some wide-eyed.
"Anon-a-miss showed me that I am not forgiven yet," Sunset said. She giggled. "It's funny, the Princess told me this kind of thing wouldn't—it wouldn't hurt." She shook her head. "Head on the message, Shimmer."
She looked up.
"I'm so sorry I for what I did to all of you; that your anger would run so deep, that even my friends were hurt so badly by me that I never had a chance to defend myself… my actions caused this… they caused Anon-a-miss to do what she did."
Sunset shuddered. "So, I-I want to leave… to leave you all with-with a message, now that I am… going…"
There was a screech as her legs gave under her and she held on to the microphone, dragging it down with her as she fell to the side, knees and elbow hitting the floor, hard.
The microphone hit the wood with loud thump that shook the whole room, amplified as it was. She dragged it closer. "I know it was my fault that you had so much cause to doubt me," Sunset whispered into it. "but everypo—" She chuckled. "Everyone here can do better than me. Even… anon-a-miss."
The microphone rolled from her hand, her breathing raspy. Deep, but slow. Too slow.
"Sunset!"
"You idiot!"
"Don't!"
She couldn't see them, but she could hear them. It didn't matter. They would know, now, that she was sorry.
o.0.o
As the spell completed, Sunset's body exploded into dots of light that moved on an invisible breeze, floating down and touching every person in the room.
"If anyone could be the Queen of the Prom it would have been you. I'm sorry I stole it from you."
"Your plants and flowers were always amazing. I hated what I did to you three when I drove you apart. Your garden was beautiful. It was the only place in school I could find calm."
"I remember you. Be more sure of yourself, you're wonderful as you are. I'm sorry I chased you and made you regret so many things."
"I'm sorry you felt I was cheating you away from your sister."
"I'm sorry I made you feel insecure after all the effort you put into building your body into what you want it to be."
"I'm sorry I mocked you when you were being kind."
"I'm sorry I made you look like you had played a cruel joke on Applejack."
"I'm sorry I ruined your parties so many times out of petty anger."
"I'm sorry I never really told you how I loved your dresses."
One by one, the specks of light faded as they touched each frozen student and staff member, each with a single, heartfelt message, until they were all gone.
It was sincere. It was honest. It was heartfelt and true.
Trixie wished that she could say back she was sorry too… for wanting revenge. For hiding Sunset's homework after the fall formal.
Rose wanted to apologize… because she had seen many times before the serene smile Sunset had had when she had been in her garden before, but hid away the new one they had worked on... because she didn't want Sunset to be part of it ever again.
Apple Bloom just wanted to say she should have just talked to her.
Fluttershy wanted to say she had forgiven Sunset but this last thing had been too much a reminder of days past.
One by one, the heroes realized they also were petitioners. That they had fed and fostered their own hate as well, past beyond reason, and beyond proof. That they had wanted Sunset to be guilty; to prove that they were better than her... only to finally come to the understanding that it was they who had truly given Anon-a-miss the power to bring their hate forth.
And—like a window cracking and crashing down into pieces—they all realized right there, that they had lost their chance to say what they wanted in return.
End
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Holy Shit.
~Skeeter The Lurker
So.......did Sunset die or...... go to Equestria.....
Ah the feels! That was well done. I hate that I like these stories, cause I really like Sunset, but my mind is always like, "What if?'
Well, that was a bit more than I was bargaining for. Should have known better with D involved.
Thanks for the read.
...
Whelp. That's it everypony. Anon-A-Miss is officially over. D wins.
Great shit as usual, D.
9205482
Considering the 'Death' tag, I would assume so. As well as the point that she implied that it was a practise inside Equestria. I would assume it's sort of a 'tear yourself apart to show everyone the truth' type deal.
9205478
I concur.
~Cyclone the Signatureless
9205631
Okay. That makes sense
Huh, that’s one way to explode into apologies...
That was neat, I’m glad a big name did a non piss take crack at this (not that Justice’s take wasn’t hilarious, just happy there’s something else), and didn’t shy away from the over the top edge the stories are known for. I do think the story line has a ton of potential that hasn’t been tapped yet and would love to see more attempts.
I do wish there was more, but I do love the different perspectives and the idea that everyone thought of themselves as a hero until it was too late. It works for what it is.
Wonderful job D. Really makes someone think about things unsaid.
...what?
Dang it. Where’s that box of tissues when I need it?
I prefer this ending to many of the Anon-A-Miss stories that revel in how unfair Sunset was treated and how terrible her friends feel for not believing in her.
I can count on my hand the number of stories that point out that Anon-A-Miss was just a symptom of a larger problem, of people personally not forgetting what Sunset did in the past, that people can hold grudges even if they make an effort to be civil and "give someone a chance". The old adage of forgiving but not forgetting, such that at the first sign of duplicity they jump on it for those that actually did forgive, and fed by those that never felt that Sunset made up for the crimes she did to them in the past. Forgotten Friendship was along the same lines, just with a single person who had the means of targeting Sunset for revenge magically.
Too often Anon-A-Miss stories don't believe in the power of friendship, of forgiveness. And because of that, I think the vast majority miss the whole point of the thing. Anon-A-Miss wouldn't have worked if Sunset was so easily forgivable. It also doesn't work if she gets high and mighty about it either, because that just defeats the purpose of her even being there in the first place (to make up for what she did). That was the reason she gave for remaining there after her defeat, after all.
Lastly, this method being a thing that happens in Equestria is a very interesting concept. It might explain why ponies seem able to forgive so easily, to give others second chances. Because the alternative of not giving second chances is being subjected to this. Its existence created a whole culture of giving second chances.
I am not sure how I feel about this one. I have read it over three times, and still can't form a full opinion of this.
I think mostly because it feels incomplete. Suicide affects people far more than just... minor regrets. The idea of this being about forgiveness, rather than what sunset did being a horrible act...
Maybe you can blame it on magic, but the aftermath of seeing someone kill themselves, as a direct reaction of ypur own actions, would lead to far greater trauma than the initial repentance of Susnet Shimmer would provide.
I guess that is probably my issue... it waves away the suicide with magic, and seems to present it as a valid solution. And while that might not have been Wanderers intention, it is how it came off to me.
Ultimately Sunsets act would have a far more devastating consequence than she intended her act to have. And maybe that is why it feels incomplete, because it has the action without a real reaction or response. Witnessing the death of someone, no matter how noble that death supposedly is, is a traumatic experience to anyone, let alone the close friends who did not believe her, and would live with the knowledge, either justified or not, that they could have prevented this. And without proper grief counselling, this festers into a very dangerous mindset.
I want to like this, as it is an interested concept, but the execution rubs me the wrong way.
Wow dude. This is powerful. Another very well written and impactful story. Thank you.
9205820 I'm afraid I don't follow your logic. The story is essentially, exactly about what you're talking about. It ends where it should: the moment of realization that they now won't ever have a chance to forgive or be forgiven. I don't and never intended to go beyond that point, because that is exactly where this should end.
That's why the last paragraph is what it is.
At no point in the story was Sunset's decision made "noble" or "right". It denied them any chance thereafter. She had given up after she realized why so much of the problem were her own actions. But she also gave up on them, in a way.
9205674 I feel more would have taken away from the message: There comes a point where you just don't have the option.
9205807 It is a horrible thing to have to deal with when all you needed was to be open to forgiving, or at least believing in someone.
What you've written here is poignant and thought provoking, but I'm kinda stuck on the fact that Celestia taught young Sunset the suicide spell. Is that a standard part of CSGU curriculum, or does she only teach the spell whose only apparent purpose is to tear apart your body and soul as a final act of atonement to her personal students? Is this why Twilight is so afraid of disappointing the Princess?
9205841
What disappoints me is that it seems like this action was necessary for these students to become better people in the future. They have the potential to come to that realization, but it requires being shown how wrong their mindset was, what the consequences and losses would be. But was there any way to really understand that without having the consequences of their closed nature thrown in their faces with Sunset's sacrifice? Is there any other possible outcome?
~Skeeter The Lurker
Hm
I know you say you don't know just why you wrote it and don't doubt that, saying that, you're not consciously aware of the reason, but just in case, are you doing alright?
(The potential reasons you mention are plausible, but I thought it'd be better to ask, just in case.)
That was refreshingly original.
This was pretty deep, and really powerful. Probably the most introspective Anon-a-miss story I've read since Myriad Thoughts, going by the length.
The ultimate escape option.
The problem is, it does not solve any problems.
9206017
From the story, ponies seem to believe it does. It's basically described as the last option for somepony who is repentant but can't make up for their sins. Of course there's no proof if it actually does anything or just kills the pony in question, but seeing how it's apparently Harmony-based magic I'd say the chances are pretty good.
9206116
Did it help to integrate Sunset into the society? No, for obvious reasons.
Did it make her better? No, for same reasons.
Did it make other people better? Don't think so. Most likely it made them traumatized by their classmate suiciding in front of them.
9206158
It seems to be a pony-religious thing. It's literally not meant to do anything in this world except show the ponies you've wronged that you genuinely regret what you've done without room for duplicity or misinterpretation. Every other intended effect of the spell concerns whatever comes after for the pony who cast it.
I'm not saying it's a great or practical spell, but it's a choice, part of pony culture, and there's definitely a difference to regular suicide (assuming it works, which considering ponies have magic and cutie marks and thus likely souls, I'll assume it does).
As for the trauma thing, that's why it's a last resort. From her point of view Sunset might even think it gives them peace of mind instead of nightmares.
The implications of that spell’s existence are also profound. It sounds like something that Sunset found on her own, and Celestia talked to her about rather than risk a young student reaching her own conclusions. But it strikes me as also being relatively well known - or at least known of - though certainly not used much in modern times.
In the silence between the lines, I think this is also a profound argument against suicide as a form of penance. After all, is it impossible that her friends would come to their senses? That she could have successfully atoned over time?* Perhaps most of all, would Sunset have used the spell if she had known who Anon-A-Miss was?
I think not.
.
.
.
*Though I think her activities after Movie 1 should have made significant in-roads along those lines.
9206180
That's just stupid.
If you have done something wrong, simply dying won't help anyone. Simply being apologetic also won't. Those two combined - they won't help either.
The only way to atone is through good deeds. If you can, do them yourself. If the one you wronged won't accept it - do it anonimously.
And Sunset didn't make it. She gave up and run away. Sure, the spell must have given her solace in that everyone will get her apology. But the consequences are not her problem anymore.
9206185
I think this is somewhat like seppuku. Sure, it's all romantical and stuff, but in reality it's gory and painful and useless. Might be found by Sunset in some book. Then Celestia tried to explain that it's not a good thing to do. And now she feels betrayed and worthless, remembers about this and decides it's the only thing that can restore her honor. Or something like that.
A pity, really. Because if she changed on inside, the solution would be just to change the outside, like transferring to another school, and maybe some psychiatric help to support her in first times.
And apologising for her earlier behaviour can come later. Because time does indeed heal.
9205855 I don't think it was necessary, exactly. There were ways things could have gone differently, of course, but in this "what if" Sunset felt that it was her best choice, given the pain she had given others before. Of course, that's up for debate, as really in the end, even if they did change their minds, or understood the depth of her regret, it would be too late to really say or do anything to make things better.
9205852 I was thinking more along the lines of what 9206185 said; Sunset found it on her own and Celestia explained what it did and why they did it. I don't think she ever considered Sunset would think she needed to use it.
9205883 9205834 I'm okay guys, thanks for asking.
9206180 9206158 Cultural differences, personal beliefs, extreme measures... in the end, however well-intended, Sunset's decision will leave a lot of questions that CHS students are ill-prepared to confront... I imagine in Ponyland, given their nature, no one suffers alone and understanding and forgiveness is shared by all of them with all of them. Humans however...
9206185 Sure, you can incorporate it!
9206218
Yeah, I mostly agree. I think her choice was made, not out of honor or nobility, but from feeling trapped. Like there was no hope left, and no point. Depression is a mind-twister, and I think she had it in spades. But I imagine there is or was a mystique around it among some ponies, rather like forms of suicide have in our world.
And, of course, she had changed, and even become a hero. But this Sunset wasn’t able to face the pain, and genuinely thought she had done so much she couldn’t be forgiven. And even one voice saying, “Hey, I believe in you” would have prevented her suicide.
D,
This is haunting. Such a terrible waste and loss, on all sides. Well done.
May I incorporate that spell into my own stories? I have no intention of re-doing your tale, but I would like for it to be discussed and examined in my Equestrias. I have been looking for a puzzle-piece to fit a few of my future Sunset Rising stories together, and I think this might be perfect.
Yay, thank you!
How exactly did she cast the spell? She can only use magic when singing or ponying up and I doubt she's in the right state of mind to do that.
I anticipate this will go down in history with Blink and the like, drawing strong but divided opinions from all corners. For my end, it was pretty darned original.
I'm split. On a Watsonian level, you acknowledge the reputation that made blaming Sunset for the slander campaign not just attractive but reasonable in the eyes of many... but at the same time, this fixes the problem much in the same way that burning down your house means you don't have to worry about a stopped-up toilet anymore. On a Doylist level, that comic was so infuriatingly stupid that it doesn't deserve a story this good, and there are still a number of unanswered questions that neither addresses.
All told, I'm really not sure of I liked this one or not. Still, definitely one of the better Anon-a-Miss stories on the site.
9206225
Ah, good. :)
(By the way, I do wonder what the actual mechanism of the spell is. If it was just a piece of unicorn magic, could Sunset use it while in human form? I suspect it may be ritual magic or somesuch thing, depending on how this particular universe's magic system works. And it would presumably be just as usable by the other tribes, if someone in human form can cast it.)
9206340 well, you are a fan of most everything
Readers:
If it left you feeling unsatisfied, then I did a good job. The story is about that moment of missed opportunities. When you realize that there are things you wish you could have said to someone, but they're gone forever. In this instance, it's obviously a sad, and regrettable circumstance, just like Rose could have told a happy thing to Sunset—like about their new garden—she can't now, because she held back before, just as surely as Apple Bloom could have told Sunset she felt that she was taking her sister away from her.
Unsatisfied is the right feeling.
Uneasy and wishing for more are the right feelings.
Feeling incomplete because there is so much pending... and no longer a chance to say anything to the one that needs to hear it... that's what this story is about.
Given the theme -People, please! Even if there is a tag for death, openly stating there is a suicide occuring should be considered a spoiler!- I was expecting something really nasty but I must say I am surprised and glad I read it. Hopefully this will be the end of all the anon-a-miss stories.
Sunset doesn't feel so good.
Obvious joke, but it had me laughing my ass off from the moment she dissipated.
9206979
No. Why? Why would you say that? Too soon! Nooo!
Further proof Magneto was right about humanity. What they fear, they reject. They are nothing more than savages.
9206823
Sorry to burst your bubble.
But it's far from over.
9206265
As someone mentioned above, it could be some form of Ritual Magic (With some form of material and/or Somatic (The hand wavy bits) components used beforehand) activated by a keyword she spoke, possibly the last "Anon-a-miss" but that's just a guess. Or she activated the spell beforehand and its effects just take time, almost like an acid slowly dissolving your very essence from the inside out before you finally just break apart, bearing your soul to the world at hand, quite literally, it seems.
Edit: Formatting and spellchecking due to being on mobile and having massive thumbs.
9207119
these are fictional peple lol. the point of advancing and progressing is to move past that shit
9207302
Magneto has the worst of it. In his eyes, we will never progress.
9206823
Bro, the Anon-A-Miss stories are far from over.
Holy fuck. That was a new take on an old path. Well done. Also, fuck you for making me sad you killed Best Pony.
It hit me beautifully; well done. Succinct.
As neat (and childishly edgy-while-trying-not-to-be) the idea of a pony ritually sacrificing themselves to prove a point is, the story just doesn't click. This is Sunset. She's never 'all alone, lost and forgotten'. Regardless of anything else that's happening, she has her FIRST friend, Princess Twilight, who supports her. She has an out that she might want to use before, but reconsidered because of her connections here. The connections are gone now; she's free to leave them behind. If they broke as soon as the first half-baked attempt at framing her came rolling, they weren't worth much anyway.
The most likely outcome of Anon-a-miss, besides resolving it, was Sunset giving middle finger to human Equestria and leaving for good. 'And have fun with the next Star Swirl's relic that comes calling!'. This whole 'oh woe is me, people don't like me, I'll kill myself to prove a point'... No, sorry. Tag this AU, because this is an entirely different character we're talking about.
One angle that does come to mind would be 'suicide bomber' style, with sanity damage instead of health damage. Although Sunset should know that she would have stronger effect (and do more damage, if she chose to) alive than dead, so even that's not good enough.
9208109
Clearly the story is not for you if it's past your understanding what it's about to this extent. Thanks for reading, I guess, and condescendingly throwing your opinion in there on character traits while ignoring the underlying message.
Also... no, it doesn't need the AU tag just because it doesn't cater to your perceptions of what a character should/shouldn't do/feel/perceive/say. If that's your metric, you also don't understand how tags work.