Even the most famous supermodel in Equestria needs some time off, and Fleur de Lis is that supermodel. She takes a vacation to recharge her batteries, but what happens when her sweet tooth rears its head?
A little entry for a contest in a Discord server. Haven't written Fleur yet so I had some fun with this one.
Enjoy!
Such a good story.
This text needs to be formatted with a proper endline/paragraph character. The highlight is for me to comment that fruits are high in sugar, and I think it'd be more appropriate for the dietician to suggest grasses instead. Not grains, because their carbs can also be fattening... Also, somewhere above the quoted text is the word "conceited" where you should have "conceded".
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Thanks much
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The formatting is pretty janky on this site admittedly. And think of it as the dietitian being a know-nothing-know-it-all
But thanks for the critique
Very well written and enjoyable. Also, love Pinkie's breaking the fourth wall. Don't question it, it's Pinkie Pie.
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She just does that, it's fine don't even worry about it
Thanks!
i guess slimmin is really sleeping on fleur's new look.
Now that was a fine read!
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Hehehehe
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Thanks much