Critique of any kind is always welcome.
Trixie's experience with the Alicorn Amulet has left her just a little bit more bitter. Searching for an outlet to express her frustrations, she decides to go back to a town that once shunned her in pursuit of long overdue vengeance.
Others might call her plan just a little bit petty. They would be wrong. Trixie doesn't do anything "little".
Page generated in 0.149 seconds
Total duration
737 users online
734,524 hits today, 2,364,530 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This was an excellent Trixie story. An introspection into all of her facets, from the boasting showmare near-obsessed with putting down hecklers the moment they raise their heads, to the bitter and vengeful mare who turned to dark magic in a search for power, to the still bitter and vengeful mare who is learning to live and thrive with those feelings (and nightmares) and find her own path to redemtion through them... all shown in a single chapter without distracting from the main story.
You made her the smart, resourceful and slightly sassy character I secretly want (almost) every pony on the show to be, without taking away any of her flaws. Her shown and implied skills are plausible, well chosen and wonderfully specialized to fit her special talent, and it makes them way more awesome than just suddenly being on par with "Little Miss Friendship" would ever be.
All in all, a great story and I'm going to keep an eye out for more from you.
Yesssss... join us. Embrace the pony fiction.8614682
Well, that was a lot faster and a lot more positive than I expected. I honestly wasn't even sure how long the approval would take let alone anyone finding it.
Thank you very much for the feedback. What you said about her still being bitter but channeling it in a new, better direction is pretty much exactly what I was hoping to convey. As to her skills, I figured that as a stage magician she would be less about mastering a whole array of spells and more about finding creative applications and combinations of a smaller set of standbys.
Also, it embraced me and now I can't get it off. Seriously, I've been writing for weeks.
This was amazing, I had a big smile on my face when I realized what it was building up to and while it wasn't as satisfying as more personal forms of revenge, I'm glad to see Trixie is rising above being directly hurtful and is becoming a better pony, and this clearly would be the best example of a fully redeemed Trixie if I've ever seen one.
8614754
Thank you for reading. I'm glad to hear that it provoked a smile. The idea for what form revenge should take just sort of popped into my head while I was walking one day and I knew I had to use it somewhere. It's good to hear that it works in actual written form.
8614775
I wonder what would Miss Friendship had to say about Trixie's revenge.
8615652
I'm not sure. Maybe something about how the ends don't always justify the means. I'm sure she'd probably disapprove to at least some extent. I mean, Trixie's methods weren't going to win her many friends in the audience, were they?
Man! This is great. I wish I had a drive like you do to write. I've been watching the show for four years or so now, and I haven't really ever contributed anything. I just wish I could find something I could do to show my appreciation, like you have.
Need I say how awesome this was?
9149252
I'm just happy you liked it regardless of its exact awesome rating.
You really captured that 'I want petty revenge feeling' that everyone gets at some time or another.
9616629
Thank you! Let's just say that I wrote what I know with this one.
Fortunately for Trixie's plan the vegetables weren't rotten.
9680091
That's why she set it up next to the local market. They only bring fresh things to sell.
9680133
Smart.
Honestly, initially we get the impression that this very much about revenge, but I feel like a lot of it was about Trixie giving herself closure to a severe past hurt.
She isn't there to throw the produce back at the crowd or to give a lousy performance, and she helps a charitable cause while she's at it. She came there after years of working experience with a better stage presence and a tougher skin - to look those who hurt her in the eye and acknowledge within herself that she was stronger now, and that they couldn't hurt her anymore. 🍅
So it was honestly a lot deeper a story than I was expecting at first glance. I'm not one to approve of revenge, but I will say that Trixie was very in-character and that this, having more dynamic aspects to it which I did not expect, all culminated together into making this a uniquely enjoyable read. I guess I just needed a little time to collect my thoughts before I could give you a decent review for this piece. Thanks for the share!
9680840
Thank you for your feedback, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Part of it is closure, part of it is revenge, and part of it is her finding better ways to express her anger without resorting to dark magic. She gets to have her petty satisfaction by turning it into something good and ultimately harmless. Trixie has a temper and probably always will. She just needs healthier outlets. This is prooobably not the healthiest, but it's a start.