I suppose Rainbow Dash had always been my favorite pony. I also like Doctor Who and anime.
Twilight Sparkle had been living a perfect life as the Princess of Equestria, then one day everything changed. During one of her experiments, the accidental temporal explosion threw her thousands of years into Equestria future She is now living her new and bizarre life as a police officer in a Neo Ponyvile.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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There are no technical areas in spelling, grammar, punctuation that I can see but I feel this should be more engaging and that Twilight isn't fully being expanded on to her full potential as there is not much to convey that and it doesn't really "grab" the readers attention either. I am no the future type kind of story but this just leaves me asking why?
8522564
The future story is just one of the options that I choose to work with, another option was to write Twilight who lives in a present-day Manehattan, instead of Poniville and Canterlot. If I worked on that idea a bit more I would have probably written that story instead.
You know what this fic needs? A COPS theme song
It's very easy to get into, however I feel like your jumping from one thing to the next to the next leaving me confused. It's fine for a little confusion if the MC is confused and such but it's feels like she knows what's going on but can't keep here train of thought. Kinda how I imagine listening to Pinkie's thoughts. But still like it just hope that it becomes a bit less Pinkie.
If the main OCs in this story were voiced, what would they sound like?
8528629
Silver Star is kind of like deeper voice of a female pony in her 30s
Dispatcher(I didn't decide what to call him yet) he is male pony about 24-25 with clear and crisp voice
I'm liking OP Twi. Also how long has she been in the future? I really want to see her talking to the original Spike. Is this true Immortality or is it eternal youth? I mean if she gets shot in the head is she going to die, and I know about the explosion in the first chapter but it could be blown off as high durability.
Could use a bit of cleaning, and the time frame is jumpy last chapter it sounded like she's been in the future for a while but then the beginning of this chapter it feels as though she is and isn't.
Also why would she Need to ask Celestia for replacement wings, when she is a CELESTIA DAMN ALICORN?!! I mean she is a one-mare army so even a Maga Corp would label her a major asset that needs to be in peak performance, which mean she needs her wings! Also......WHAT THE BUCKING HAY CELESTIA?? Twilight is your faithful student that you taught sense she was very young, even if you don't see her as a daughter she must have at least once thought of you as her second Mother. She literally tramitized the entire population of Ponyville to write a letter to you to make you proud! And she has to ask...ask you to get her wings replaced?! GAAAHHH!!
Ahh, now I feel better and I want you to know that rant was to Tia not the author or the story.
8558746
1) About a year.
2) Twilight cannot die from aging and disease but she is still somewhat vulnerable to trauma, she can reattach broken limbs, but she can't regrow them. she has a very thick head so she can just take normal bullets head on. However, if she gets shot in the head by a high explosive armor piercing round and somehow isn't aware of it then she is in a serious trouble of dying.
8559495
So it's not so much immortality but accelerated regeneration that keeps her youthful and allows for limbs to get reattached but won't regrow added with enhanced powers that came with ascending.
8558778
1) Partially it's because of corporate bureaucracy, by asking Celestia Twilight wants to accelerate the whole process, and Celestia can do it just by sneezing. It never occurred to Celestia to send Twilight an early Heartwarming gift because she was too busy scheming a grand plan of how to send Twilight back in time.
2) Megacorp treats Twilight as a test subject, she is the only one who volunteered to be a guinea pig. Megacorp wants to push Twilight past her limits, and the more she is under pressure the better the results. If they would actually provide her with artificial wings, which they would have to eventually, then that would reduce her value as a biological.
8563554
That's correct.
Twilight's prolly gonna have a love-hate relationship with donuts.
Bit of an odd ending, but overall a pretty good story!